Today, I worked construction building a hotel. I was taking out the trash when I suddenly felt an extreme urge to poop. I ran into one of the rooms and found an empty cardboard box to poop into. Finished, I closed the box and made my way to the door. I then saw my boss staring at me from the closet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML
Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML
Today, while my roommate was taking a bath, I became horribly sick out of nowhere. Since the bathroom was occupied, I ended up having explosive diarrhea in an Amazon box in my bedroom, which I immediately ran out to the dumpster. FML
Today, I took a massive dump at work and clogged the industrial toilet. Since I used the unisex one at the end of the hall, I watched my super hot coworker walk in after me. And then she ran out immediately. Everyone had seen me walk out before her. FML
Today, I walked into the ladies' bathroom to find my male boss taking a dump with the stall door wide open. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Today, I had to take a dump in a box for a stool test. FML
Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML
Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML
Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML
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Top comments
Druu 53
"Oh, I'm sorry. sir. I didn't realize you were using the room. Did you need the box next?"
PaulieXP 16
The real question is what was your boss doing in the closet?
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Comments (20)
Druu 53
"Oh, I'm sorry. sir. I didn't realize you were using the room. Did you need the box next?"
Oh_No_Not_Him 25
There are just so many things wrong with this I don't konw where to begin!
Lalala579121 28
Does a construction worker shit in a box?
Murgray D. John 12
I hope you were carrying the box, and didn't plan on just leaving it there.
jessicasoho 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
So when you buid things you use them? A bedroom you sleep? A pool you swim?
Arashikage 18
The hell are you trying to say?
PaulieXP 16
The real question is what was your boss doing in the closet?
Nutbar_2416 2
Isn't it obvious? He's not ready to fully come out as gay, bisexual, or trans yet.
pjsr 33
Working, of course; it's a construction site
Glowworm56 27
"Oh, sorry sir. I just wanted to experience how a cat does it in a litter box. It's not half- bad. Would you like to try it?"
Pixiewolfe 46
Don't you have portable Loo's on site? How did you wipe? Where did you leave the box after? How did you wash your hands? Most importantly, what on earth did your boss say after he came put of the closet??
idk_rose 25
Oh, shit.
RichardPencil 32
And in a few days, we'll see: "Today, I have a Ph.D. in medieval Hungarian poetry and to make a dent in my $200,000 student loan debt, I took a job cleaning up at a construction site. In one room, I found a sealed cardboard box and picked it up, and it seemed heavier than an empty box would be. I was excited as discovering lost property would contribute to advancement in my new career. Before bringing it to my boss (a closeted fellow, but that's another story), I wanted to examine the contents of the box to ensure it's value. As I opened it, the stench punched me in the face as I stared at shit -- not items of low value, no, literal shit (feces, excrement, dung!) I felt at that moment, I saw my life as this metaphor: a box of shit. Am I violating the 300-character limit? Hell, yeah, but did you not see "box of shit?" FML."
Cali 57
*slow clap*
Pixiewolfe 46
*slower clap*