Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up at 4 a.m., my back sore from being twisted like a pretzel due to my toddler. I successfully moved him, then my sick baby woke up, tried to nurse, screamed because he couldn’t breathe through his nose, screamed because I suctioned his nose, tried to nurse a blanket, then screamed when I offered him an actual boob. FML
Today, my newborn daughter has kept me up all day and all night for the past few days. Usually my husband sleeps. I finally cracked and yelled for his help, only for him to scream at me that he needs sleep and gives her to me anyway. FML
Today, it was my brother's wedding so my mother-in-law was taking care of my 8-month-old son. When I came back to our room to check how things were going, I saw her "breastfeeding" my child. She said it was the only way to calm him down because he didn't have a pacifier. FML
Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML
Today, I drove to the hospital to see my newborn. I went to the room, picked him out of the crate and held him. Then I heard the toilet flush and saw a woman who I didn't know come out. She screamed. My wife was in the room next door. FML
Today, my 10-month-old kept me up all night after a gruelling day. I finally fell asleep with her at about 2 a.m., and I woke up half an hour later to her hands on my throat, and her biting my nose. Startled, I took a big breath through my nose and snorted an ungodly amount of slobber. I’m awake now. FML
Today, I finally got my fussy newborn back to sleep after the creaking of my chair woke her. I then crept two rooms over and opened a pack of chips, the crinkle of which woke her again. FML
Today, while breast feeding my 7 month-old before his nap, I hummed his favorite song as I rocked. He pulled away, stared at me, and cried til I shut up. FML
Today, my four-year-old daughter started screaming and lashing out at me as I was getting her ready for a bath. It seems my idiot husband told her she was still small enough to be feasted on by the "drain monster". FML
Today, at 2:30am, I heard my baby crying on the monitor. As I got out of bed, she stopped crying and started laughing. There's nobody else in the house. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
That screaming was actually your daughter after your baby latched on. I hear that hurts.
Ace132 20
You know the saying kids grow fast?
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Comments (71)
interesting33 37
I hope she was holding him properly!
suckceed 17
Half the freaking world has their babies sleep with them and they haven't excludively produced insecure adults. Seriously hate the bs the West spews about other countries/cultures methods. Pretty sure all those Asian and African babies who slept in the same room as their parents, are not only secure but more caring of their parents.
Shade1982 21
There actually has been no undisputed study to show any correlation between the two. For every example people come up with saying this is true, you can come with another example showing the exact opposite...
avaeba 14
Most of what I've read says that children who co-sleep grow up confident. Not everyone "in the West" is closed-minded about different parenting techniques. If anything, a lot of mothers (you'd be surprised how many) aspire to the parenting ideals of other countries. I for one have a lot of respect for how most European countries handle their business; their mortality rates are far lower, and parents get much more time to bond with and raise their children at home
Bonibo 0
Holy shit, your kid is insane!
ViviMage 40
She may have been trying to quiet him with her nipple as a pacifier. Still, so very wrong! I hope she didn't wake the kid up for this!
Glitter_taco_ 10
Like mother like daughter
avaeba 14
Can't vote either way on this one- that's just too precious. Sounds like she was trying to help. She'll make an awesome big sis
Myo_fml 20
Not really an FML but I'm happy you shared such an adorable moment. Thanks for making my day. :)
pennies_lane 6
Really? Was that last part necessary???
ElTigre995 4
Hey, you gotta start sometime
Yoyo2002 10
that's kinda sweet weird but sweet