Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents over lunch. Unfortunately, I showed my dad her Facebook profile beforehand and he wouldn't stop making cracks about her duckfacing. It started with, "Don't let her eat the bread, it'll puff up in her stomach and kill her", and ended in tears. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. The first thing my dad did was comment that given how pretty she looked in our photos, and compared to how she looks in real life, she's amazing at using Photoshop. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Dinner was going well until her dad secretly fed the asparagus to the dog under the table, and then "discovered" what a childish thing I had done. My girlfriend believed him. FML
Today, I proudly told my elitist dad that I now have a beautiful girlfriend. He didn't believe me, so I showed him her Facebook. He demanded that I stop seeing her, saying that the duck-facing in her avatar was the hallmark of "a lower form of being" who would only ever shame our family. FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my dad. I thought it was a good idea at the time, at least until he took her aside for a private chat. During the chat, he told her all about my two previous marriages and advised her to "get out while you can". FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML
Today, I was introducing my boyfriend to my parents for the first time. I meant to say, "Mom, Dad, this is Tom." Instead, I said, "Mom, Dad, this is Mom." My boyfriend is now jokingly reconsidering our relationship, and my parents won't stop making fun of me. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Within minutes, they said I needed to leave. Their reason? Apparently, I was mocking her dad's speech impediment. I also have one but they wouldn't believe me. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. They thought it would be funny to pretend that they're nudists. FML
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Top comments
rileyrae0000 23
She's kinda asking for it by duck facing but that is a little messed up of your dad for a first impression
Dave_Davington 34
I want to buy your dad a drink.
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Comments (108)
9a_1z 12
He must have driven her quackers. (sorry)
HollyQuinn 21
She needs to lighten up, that's funny shit.
SecundusSecunda 27
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
She deserves it for duckfacing
SecundusSecunda 27
But making her cry was uncalled for
goose12321 11
Maybe it was the push she needed to bring an end to it once and for all. You gotta do what ya gotta do. #StopTheDuckFace
BiGTiMeNeRD 29
He's just making harmless wisequacks.
HarryWholock87 17
Get out
LastResort318 14
Who ruffled your feathers?
BiGTiMeNeRD 29
Never.
isaak_sanchez 18
I love how people are saying people deserve to be reduced to tears. I'm glad I'm not friends with any of you.
LikeYouGiveAShit 27
They never said it was her tears, could of been tears of laughter anyway. Either way if you duckface be prepared to get called out on it.
lavapants 15
Dude what the **** are you doing on FML then?, a site that purpose is to laugh about the misery of others.
Fairyjoshy 13
Sure, it's a site for funny quotes, but that doesn't justify being a sociopath.
TheNewGuy03 29
Your dad and I would easily be best friends or something close to that just based on his response. He may have crossed the line a bit, though...
newzealand 28
Dad for the win
TomeDr 25
Sounds like my father-in-law. One or two jokes were fine but he'd run with a joke to the point of cruelty, never getting the hint to back off.
mrlawlor7777 26
Most guys do not get hints. If he goes too far, plainly and calmly tell him that. If he still continues, he's just a dick.
G_wiz 5
Your dad's a true bro. And you deserved it for dating an idiotic chick.
ladycoco8 20
I find that funny, but maybe I'm just a little less insecure than your girlfriend seems to be. Yeah, we all duckface once in a while, but if all or majority of her photos are duckfaces, then that was her own fault. Or yours. Because you showed your dad the photos. Actually, I'm blaming you now. **** her life.
itsme82 18
I have never duck faced and I never will. So by all of us a you mean a small majority of women. Don't put me in that stupid ass shit.
ladycoco8 20
Small majority? I think not. Don't get me wrong, I think the duckface is absolutely absurd. I would never post a picture making that face. However, almost every female does it.
Nessco 36
Another one right here that wont do it.
bandaidstations 28
Yeah, ditto. No way I would ever take a picture of myself making a duck face. Maybe by majority you mean most basic bitches post them. No self respecting woman does this.
littlekellilee 45
Duck faces are cute, because ducks are adorable! A human trying to look like a duck is not cute.