Today, I noticed a flashy car badly parking itself in a handicapped space. I hate the asshats who do this, so I went up to berate the driver. After an opening salvo of coarse language, a glint of light on his wheelchair in the back caught my eye. I then had to apologise for being a shitehawk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told a guy he should be ashamed of himself for parking in a handicapped space. He hit me with his prosthetic leg. FML
Today, I got back to my car with a note cussing me out for parking in a disabled space when I’m clearly not disabled. They also smashed my windows. It’s true, I’m not disabled, but I also wasn’t parked in a disabled space. I was parked in a normal space next to the disabled spaces. FML
Today, after parking in the handicapped spot of a lot with my placard, an older couple with their 7-year-old grandchild came up and yelled at me for being a lying asshole and taking the parking spot. When I showed them my prosthetic leg, the kid started crying and guess who got yelled at again. FML
Today, as I was getting out of my car, an old and obese lady walked up to me and called me an "inconsiderate heartless bitch" for using the last handicap parking spot. I guess she didn't see my wheelchair. FML
Today, the car in front of me in the drop-off area at my son's school parked, and the driver got out. I basically leaned on my horn and gave her every dirty look in the book. She said nothing but stared at me as she opened the back of her van to unload her child's wheelchair. I'm an asshole. FML
Today, I went out with my girlfriend to a restaurant. After parking up next to a badly parked Audi, I commented, “Typical shit parking by an Audi driver.” Unbeknownst to me, the owner was walking to his car at the exact same moment. FML
Today, I parked in a disabled bay so I could drop my son off at his appointment. My son uses crutches and has a blue badge. As I was trying to leave, an absolute Karen started chewing my ass for using a disabled bay while “not looking disabled”, then lay under my wheels to stop me leaving. FML
Today, I went to Safeway. Go in, get stuff, come out, and I have almost no room to get into my car because an SUV was parked in a compact spot next to me all crooked. Irritated, I got a pen and paper and wrote 'Nice parking you F*ing idiot' and stuck it on the windshield. Then I notice someone was in the SUV. FML
Today, I'm so bad at parking that I saw the guy next to me openly cringe as I pulled into a spot. FML
Today, I was parking my car outside of my apartment, but the big truck next to the spot went over the line. I squeezed in anyway. Later, I discovered the truck had left and someone keyed my car. They left a note saying, "Good parking job, asshole." FML
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Top comments
fatblackguy 3
asshat
FruityLoooons 8
Hah. Shitehawk. Anyway, why are people solving things by being impulsively aggressive, nowadays? Geez.
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Comments (230)
Elizabeth198 1
Maybe you should work on something's in life. Including grammar and being observant first. Best Wishes-
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
Oh the irony.
paschale 7
You sir are a nob end as well as a bell end
hellbilly205 17
Lol funny 'cause OP's name is bellend. I see what you did there
tylahgrace 12
That was awfully careless of you but, I dislike you more because you use words like asshat and shitehawk
kimmy91 12
I have a disability and I get abused by people for using handicapped parking spaces all the time despite the fact i'm in a wheel chair or using canadian crutches. Apparently if you're young and drive a nice car you're not allowed to have a disability. I dread going anywhere because I get abused by people like you for something that isn't my fault. I know you thought you were doing the right thing but now you know not to be so quick to judge people.
thiscrazything 1
I can understand OPs reasoning. It also makes me angry when I see healthy looking person pop out of their car in a handicap spot, and take off at a fast walk to a store, leaving the truly disabled people nowhere close to park. Mean people abuse the system, getting their doctors to give them a plaque for things like a broken finger .
KelBelAndNats 7
29, I understand your point but you need to recognize that just because someone looks healthy doesn't always mean they are. They may not have a wheelchair, walking frame, crutches etc but they may still be very unwell. You never know what medical issues a person has so you shouldn't judge on what you THINK you see. I understand there are people out there who abuse the system, but you can't assume everyone who looks healthy that uses a disabled space is abusing the system.
HannahWho 8
If you feel someone is abusing the space it is still not your place to say something. I understand people who abuse the system should be poked with hot sticks, but you never know what they are going through. They might be having a good day or be used to the pain so they can walk fast. They might have a lot wrong with them, until you know then it is not your place to be the Handicap police.
MissHayleyJames 7
My stepmom has a severely screwed up back. She can walk normally for the most part if she doesn't have to do it for very long. It still causes her extreme pain though. She has the handicapped thing for her car and gets shit for it all the time. Like the others said, just because someone looks fine, doesn't mean that they are.
jkamme54 2
All of you have some well thought out bullshit ideas!
kimmy91 12
90, I could not agree more!!
kimmy91 12
And 29 you cannot get a mobility parking pass for a broken finger...I don't know anyone who has ever managed to do that (at least not in Australia where I live). Some days I look healthy and can walk unaided but I'm always worried I won't make it back to my car. You can never assume there is nothing wrong with someone just because they look ok on the outside. My Aunty has chronic lung disease so she has to park close and people abuse her all the time because she 'looks healthy'. I would gladly trade all the parking spaces in the world to be healthy and live a normal life so anyone whining about it can trade with me anytime.
rillastyle 1
I know a guy who looks fine but get's so out of breath after walking 100m he has to sit down, good ol 1 bung lung. Can't judge a book by its cover
ElegantlyLovelyy 6
Yet still at the end of the day it's not your place to judge.
Enslaved 38
If you weren't planning on parking in that same handicapped spot, what do you care? You're still a shitehawk even after your apology.
rubberduckie94 13
You could park their for having a handicap known as being a dumb asshole.
Pelreskovich 11
Oh the irony..
chubbles 9
I hate people that use stupid words like 'asshat' and 'shitehawk'
boomhauer18 3
Your cute
DocBastard 40
The only thing worse than people abusing handicapped parking is assholes like you who yell at people who use them appropriately. I can only hope that someday you actually NEED one of those spaces.
Bullettrane 1
my what colorful language you got there.