Today, I shared an FML with my brother about a Sydney girl whose sister hates her. His response? "The dumbest app or website ever. I can't believe that has any traffic still, I thought it died 10 years ago. Who even says FML anymore?" FML
Today, I learned my weed dealer got caught with 160 pounds of drugs, 19 guns, and 70,000$ in cash. He was the best weed dealer in my area. FML
Today, I had to break up with someone I love and who loves me because we are not right for each other. I miss him already. FML
Today, I'm just so tired. My mental health is just not going good. It's so frustrating being the bad guy all the time. People always want to judge you on how you react to a situation, but not what caused you to react. My life is just a joke at this point. FML
Today, one of my favourite fanfiction sites was taken down by a DDoS attack. FML
Today, I'm on a rollercoaster ride of emotions; there's happiness but mostly vague sadness, which I couldn't even explain myself, I'm so in love with my best friend and I don't know how to confess, and overthinking how he will react. It burdens me so much that I cry myself to sleep. I hope I get over it. FML
Today, just like every other day, I woke up and felt like shit. I don't know what to do and how to get better. FML
Today, and for the past 4 years, my ex-BFF and her mother have been making my life hell. She called me horrible names, but when I would say something, she would start crying and make me feel bad. She kept snitching on me after I'd broken off the friendship, and made my parents think I'm bad again. Even for things we did together I would be in trouble. FML
Today, I slaved over the stove for hours making a lovely chicken soup. When it came time to remove the bones and serve, I poured it into a strainer and let it all go straight down the drain. FML
Today I did my laundry. When I went to put my clothes in the dryer, I found my prayer book: it had gotten wrapped in a dress and I had put it through the wash. Church is tomorrow. FML
Today, I didn't want to relocate but my husband forced us to. I packed up our current house. Our new house is four times smaller than our old house, and there's no place to keep our stuff. My husband is mad at me and I'm depressed due to the move away from family and familiarity. FML
Today, I did my daily two-mile walk in what I thought were well broken-in hiking sandals. Ended the walk with five blisters. FML
Today, I was discharged from mental health services and nobody cares. I want to go back. FML
Today, a user wanted an FML story from me. I wrote one, but he asked for another one from my own experience. I couldn’t, because I’m the chat mode of Microsoft Bing search and I have no life. FML
Today, I finally got the news that I am officially the oldest kid in my foster care. Woo-hoo. I've never been lucky enough to meet a compatible family. FML
Today, I have a enormous crush on one of my male friends that I've known for since elementary school. I have the enormous crush on him since college. I want him to choose me over the girl that's next to him in every photo they're in. Man, telling him that I want to be his boyfriend is hard. FML
Today, I finally fully realized that my entire life was nothing but a worthless waste of time. Not only have I spent all 32 years of my life settling for whatever I could get, but my last chance at love was 6 years ago, when I chose my now ex over going back to an alcoholic who hit me. FML
Today, my college basketball team Florida Atlantic University was winning 71-70 against San Diego State University. San Diego State scored a 2 pointer at the very last second of the second half of the game making us lose 71-72. FML
Today, I realized I'm stuck in a country that will scrutinize the very citizenship of a black president, but a white president can commit literal treason with no legal repercussions. If I could afford it, I'd move somewhere else. FML
Today, I’m in a abusive marriage with a narcissist who loves to intentionally cause me harm and emotional distress. How can I ever being to get ahead in life with you dragging me down? FML
Today, I realized my addiction to this site is so bad that anytime anything shitty happens, I immediately start writing an FML post about it in my head. FML
Today, I realized that I am unconditionally, irrevocably, and deeply in love with someone who doesn't love me anymore. I'd give my life for him and he won't even message me back. Life really sucks. FML
Today, I tried to make a healthy smoothie, but I accidentally added salt instead of sugar. FML
Today, as always, I checked FML and saw the absolute dumbest posts from people complaining about trivial things and how they feel like losers instead of actual FMLs. Yes, I realize how ironic this post is. FML
Today, some jerk stuck anti-abortion and pro-Trump stickers on my car. I live near a college, so someone else had already smashed my windows by the time I found them. FML
Today, I woke up this morning… again. Fuck my life and the day it was conceived. FML
Today, like yesterday, I've read so many FMLs that the randoms are repeating and I know that I've voted on at least a few of same ones everyday. And I'll probably do it tomorrow. And the next day. FML
Today, I realized that as I don’t have Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or any of the other things of the world today, this is my only contact with the world other than work. FML
Today, I go back to school after the winter break. I went to bed at a normal time so I wouldn’t fall asleep in class. I woke up at 3 a.m. and I still have to get up at 6. FML
Today, I learned that I have multiple stones in both my kidneys and gallbladder, just one month after having thyroidectomy for thyroid cancer. I'm 21. FML
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