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xX_LilSammie_Xx

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xX_LilSammie_Xx

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 30 January 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1352
  • Number of comments : 140
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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xX_LilSammie_Xx's page activity

Visits<b>kashgillingham</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 12:35am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 4:28am<b>soulnumber9</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 8:49pm<b>noctali_Solstice</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 9:47pm<b>LiveDreamsG</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 2:31am<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 3:55pm<b>thecman25</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 12:34am<b>sanuxo_</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 10:21pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 9:22am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 10:01pm<b>joliexoxo</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 8:44am<b>Smeagol1861</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 4:43am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 12:26pm<b>nothemother</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 9:38am<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 12:49pm<b>fmltrc</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 7:21pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 1:05am<b>greenbeanlol</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 10:44pm

Liked!<b>Nathan23xx</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 9:55pm

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Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

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xX_LilSammie_Xx's favorite FMLs

Today, I askd my boyfriend to give me a back rub . He claimd tat e ad a sore and, so I retortd, "You ave two ands, rigt?" Still bitter about not bieng able to ave sex wit me wile I'm on my period, e sot back, "You ave two oles, rigt?" I give up . FML

#20540243
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33091) - you deserved it (50996) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/11/2013 at 8:21pm - intimacy - by Lilypad (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, an got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time thier around, my boyfriend always looks stoned an constipated, an his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

#20460771
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42852) - you deserved it (7373)

On 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm - love - by Bella (woman) - United States (Florida)

yesterday after sharing mah first night in bed with mah boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were mah cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

#20412240
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43831) - you deserved it (8418)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, While I Was Using Mah Computer, Mah Cat Ran Up To The Power Strip, Looked Me In The Eyes, And Hit The Power Switch, Turning Everything Off. She Does This Quite Often. FML

#20116072
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23428) - you deserved it (4285)

On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)

Today, my wife posted on Facebook, "FUCK THA POLICE!" She got 40 likes. I'm a police officer. FML

#18829619
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41224) - you deserved it (9752)

On 01/16/2012 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got into an argument with mah wife over how she spends too much time with her gay best friend. Now she says that if I want to ever get intimate with her again, I'll have to let her watch as I give him a striptease. fat FML

#18806135
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35896) - you deserved it (10093)

On 01/14/2012 at 2:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

TODAY, I WAS DIAGNOSED WITH A CLOGGED MILK GLAND. I AM NOT, NOR HAVE EVER BEEN, PREGNANT AND THEREFORE HAVE ALSO NEVER BREASTFED. THIS CONDITION IS CAUSED BY MAH BOYFRIEND'S OVER-ACTIVE URGE TO SUCK ON MAH NIPPLES. I'M IN HORRIBLE PAIN, AND HE WON'T STOP LAUGHING. FML

#18698902
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34150) - you deserved it (5790)

On 01/03/2012 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today , mah 18-year-old son asked me if I was a virgin . I still don't knowhat to say to him . FML

#18626435
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42310) - you deserved it (8330)

On 12/27/2011 at 4:50pm - intimacy - by blegh (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, mah girlfriand rafarrad to har yaast infaction as ( making braad. ) I can navar look at braad tha sama way. FML

#18623921
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25030) - you deserved it (2822)

On 12/27/2011 at 10:15am - health - by themuffinman (man) - Japan

Today, dad finally decidd to give me the "sex talk." It was going fine until he said, "If u ever decide to have sex, picture face like this" and pointd to his face,hich had a creepy, intense stare!! He just ruind sex 4 me!! Forever!! FML

#18467751
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44052) - you deserved it (5361)

On 12/09/2011 at 10:40am - intimacy - by Aly (woman) - United States

Today, I got into a car accident. Te oter party left te scene immediately after witout excanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

#18267814
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26975) - you deserved it (7978)

On 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today.. . at work.. . mah mouse cursor kept randomly moving all over the screen.. . an messed up an entre day's attempted work . As I was leaving.. . I overheard one of mah co-worker saying he'd plugged a wreles mouse adapter into mah computer.. . an had been trolling me all day . FML

#18156228
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35533) - you deserved it (4155)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:05pm - work - by tech_support (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today , my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights r activated by "clap on , clap off." It killed the mood. FML

#18150434
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33991) - you deserved it (9015)

On 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by KayleeXLoVe21 - United States (New York)

Today... two Jehovah's looool Witnesse rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied... ( Basic reasoning? ) A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits u in the eye. FML

#17468167
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36149) - you deserved it (9862)

On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my twit of a husband admitted to falling for an internet scam involving a dead foriegn politician, the promise of a share in million of dollar currently stuck in a bank, and him having wired a large amount of our money to "bribe an official". FML

#17364485
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30451) - you deserved it (4358)

On 08/04/2011 at 5:15am - money - by Username - United States



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