scorpia208

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Offline (the 03/04/2015 at 11:29pm)

scorpia208

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 25 January 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 127
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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scorpia208's page activity

Visits<b>Doritozilla</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 4:44am<b>Miss_Klutzie</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 12:43pm<b>Zezifus</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 11:37am<b>marmar9407</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 12:57am<b>EverestMelting</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 12:24am<b>Pwib</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 3:23am<b>RodzillaX</b> - the 07/03/2013 at 1:24am

scorpia208's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of scorpia208's badges

scorpia208's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

by oh shit / 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML

by bad in the sack / 07/05/2014 at 12:26am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

by boob sisters / 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, thanks to an efficient diet, I reached my target weight. Unfortunately, my chest has disappeared. My boyfriend suggested we have a funeral for my bras. FML

by BrefODM / 06/12/2014 at 11:15pm / United Kingdom / Health

Today, my psycho neighbor finished building a cannon. An honest-to-god, on-wheels, could-be-on-a-pirate-ship cannon. And now he's testing it in the forest by my house. I'm pretty scared for my life, to be honest. FML

by ldrik1 / 06/11/2014 at 4:36pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing some soccer with my buddies, when a kid came over, yelled "CUP CHECK!" and nailed me in the nuts then ran away laughing. Millions of my unborn children died in agony. All his fatass mom did was chuckle nervously and pat her satan-spawn on the head. FML

by wish his dad had worn one / 06/07/2014 at 5:16pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I was teaching my 4 year old daughter how to use "stranger danger". Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML

by imnotastranger / 05/08/2014 at 11:01pm / Kids

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I was taking the bus to work, when a man sat down beside me. The guy was nuttier than Ron Jeremy's ballsack, and had a face like a shovel and the worst meth mouth I've ever seen. I had to sit there for ages while he frantically muttered to himself and picked at my hair. FML

by fuckingfloridahowihatethee / 04/26/2014 at 3:55pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad and I got into an argument. When I was proven wrong, he said, "Good job, genius." I shot back the first thing that popped into my head, which was "I am not a genius!" He laughed and says that if I die before him, he's having that engraved on my tombstone. FML

by Anonymous / 04/25/2014 at 5:42pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, on a train, I nearly choked while sleeping with my mouth wide open. The little old lady sitting opposite me was entertaining herself by throwing little pieces of balled-up tin foil into my mouth. FML

by Anonyme / 04/24/2014 at 2:57am / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Transportation

Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML

by fuck you, Odin, FUCK YOU / 03/03/2014 at 5:35pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was playing an intense game of Flappy Bird. I was so excited at being about to beat my high score that I got a hard-on. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2014 at 5:26pm / Russian Federation (Moskva) / Intimacy

Today, my students unanimously agreed, in front of me, that the only reason they take my course is to look at my ass. FML

by jseid2 / 01/15/2014 at 12:54am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my grandma added to my elephant collection by giving me some underwear with elephant ears on the hips, and a long, sock-like nose. She has no idea they're meant for a guy. FML

by ElephantLover / 12/11/2013 at 3:14pm / United States (California) / Intimacy