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pureportedpear

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pureportedpear

39Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 14 June 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2690
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About pureportedpear : Just send me a message if you want to talk, or if you need a reccomendation on a anime/manga/manwha and I might be able to help you. Got a few books too but not as many

pureportedpear's page activity

Visits<b>Seashells77</b> - 5 hours ago<b>CarmenCnh</b> - yesterday at 11:00pm<b>adelime</b> - yesterday at 10:22pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - yesterday at 4:10pm<b>am1717</b> - yesterday at 1:33pm<b>misfit_14_</b> - yesterday at 12:45pm<b>Bethaneey</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 3:38pm<b>Psychotique</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 12:54pm<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 9:14pm<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 5:09pm<b>viktoria3</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 5:34pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 3:23pm<b>emlizcat</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 12:19am<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 7:34pm<b>Rocklegend_16</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 6:05pm<b>wassuploves</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 4:11pm<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 2:16pm<b>ashrose95</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 6:28am

Fucked!<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - yesterday at 10:10pm<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 3:14am<b>misfit_14_</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 8:20pm<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 8:16pm<b>mikotomisaki</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 3:06pm<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 8:09am<b>Sansa_Kroma</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 4:40am<b>2C0OL4SCH0OL</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 1:20am<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 8:02pm<b>ally_sanderson</b> - the 10/03/2015 at 2:51pm<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 5:09am<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 12:10pm<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 10:44pm<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 2:19am<b>randy98</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 12:12am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 1:28am<b>afrostybird</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 2:14pm<b>lindacollins423</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 8:49am

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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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pureportedpear's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss brought his cat to the office. Despite our no pet policy, I still managed to get the blame when the crazy animal scratched 3 colleagues and peed on the floor after my boss left for bathroom. Apparently I was supposed to be "looking after it". FML

#21350702
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30064) - you deserved it (2225)

On 02/06/2015 at 12:16am - animals - by anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, in an effort to avoid my school's strict no-gum policy as my teacher made a b-line to me, I swallowed it. By the time the teacher reached me, the gum was on my desk, as well as my breakfast, thanks to my overactive gag reflex. FML

#21350431
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25483) - you deserved it (15387)

On 02/05/2015 at 4:03pm - misc - by gumchuck (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I took a nice relaxing dump at school, in my pants, in the middle of class. FML

#21350418
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33181) - you deserved it (7936)

On 02/05/2015 at 3:42pm - misc - by m33p - United States (California)

Today, at work, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head on my cash register. A second later, I heard roaring laughter from the security room, followed by someone saying to play it back. I'd almost convinced myself it wasn't about me, when one of the guys came out and gave me a thumb up. FML

#21349710
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35787) - you deserved it (3392)

On 02/04/2015 at 2:28pm - work - by fxck (woman) -

Today, I had a one night stand. After holding in my farts all night as is done, I decided enough was enough and to calmly let one slip out. One did not calmly slip out instead I shit myself in her bed. I was naked at the time so was unable to hide it. FML

#21346279
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34077) - you deserved it (15837)

On 01/29/2015 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, what a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. FML

#21342921
265 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41491) - you deserved it (7639)

On 01/23/2015 at 2:25pm - kids - by nosexforthee (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I signed into my online class, got bored, and took off my headphones to argue with my roommates about anal sex. At the end of the argument, I put my headphones back on to hear my professor asking if someone could call me to tell me to turn my damn mic off. FML

Today, I met an American guy at a bar. I felt flattered when he said, "You know what they say about Swedish girls, all so beautiful." After a pause, he filled in with, "What the fuck happened to you?" FML

Today, my wife and I drove two hours from our rural town to buy a new sofa. When we got home, it took us an hour to figure out there was no way to fit it through our door. We made the two hour drive back to return it, only to find the store was closed. FML

#21308507
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30584) - you deserved it (9399)

On 11/30/2014 at 1:09am - misc - by davy0540 - United States

Today, my little sister asked if she could play on my laptop, but I said no because I was writing an essay for school. She then bit herself hard and showed the mark to our parents, saying I did it. As they bitched me out, my sister got on my laptop and deleted my half-finished essay. FML

Today, I was walking back to my dorm with my boyfriend. He was being really sweet as he held my hand. We were about to kiss goodnight and as he pushed some hair out of my face he said, "Can we hurry it up? I'm about to rip one." FML

#21289293
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31528) - you deserved it (3564)

On 10/31/2014 at 8:39pm - love - by grossedout -

Today, as I was walking home from work, I got chased halfway home by a wolf. Yes, a wolf. I live in central Norway. FML

#21288944
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37564) - you deserved it (2929)

On 10/31/2014 at 8:31am - animals - by noxiffic (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job, mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

#21283795
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38441) - you deserved it (4688)

On 10/23/2014 at 2:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was giving lifeguard instructions to a couple of teens. When I quizzed them about what they should do when someone is choking, one of them said, "Take a step back" and winked at me. FML

#21282836
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35120) - you deserved it (3875)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:18pm - work - by Australian Lifeguard - United States (Arizona)

Today, my little sister decided it would be funny to hide in the washroom closet while I was taking a piss. I wasn't pissing, I was wanking. FML

#21281971
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42439) - you deserved it (13869)

On 10/20/2014 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by John (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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