minimammoth

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Offline (the 11/21/2014 at 8:27am)

minimammoth

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 June 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1669
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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minimammoth's page activity

Visits<b>moo_mima_moo</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 11:42am<b>OhHeyItzNim</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 4:21pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 2:21am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 1:01pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 8:58pm<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 8:16am<b>eriicaaaf</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:13pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:54pm<b>snowaholicmxz</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:50pm<b>thedeej</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:22pm<b>gabix3</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 8:49pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:45pm<b>lovelypink7</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:41pm<b>Landesanity</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:37pm<b>AGB10</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 1:04am<b>dk1991</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 4:57pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 10:00am<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 2:52am

minimammoth's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

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Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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minimammoth's favorite FMLs

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

by ananymous / 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML

by Anonymous / 10/16/2012 at 8:36am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML

by stop it ninja / 10/14/2012 at 3:00am / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I completely shaved my head as a gesture for my boyfriend's mother, who was suffering from cancer and having a terrible time undergoing chemotherapy. Turns out she doesn't even have cancer, and my boyfriend thought I wouldn't have the guts to do it. FML

by horriblejoke / 10/10/2012 at 11:05am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cousin suddenly confided in me that he had tried to commit suicide by overdosing when he was 17. Shocked and not knowing how to respond, I blurted out, "Did it work?" FML

by hahagirl / 09/12/2012 at 1:40am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. They jokingly asked me if I was only with him for his money. I didn't hear them properly so I just smiled and nodded. They now think I'm a gold digging bitch. FML

by Ashley / 09/06/2012 at 8:46am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I turned on the TV just in time to see my picture on the news. I have no idea what they said about me. FML

by masterman / 08/27/2012 at 2:45am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found my husband's journal, and along with it the real reason he took so long to show up to our wedding rehearsals last year. According to the journal, it was because he was too busy wooing a married mother of five and sticking his "slut-banger all up in that fat booty." FML

by divorce? i think so / 07/20/2012 at 10:12pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2012 at 2:40am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I caught my stylist in the mirror attempting to get his colleague to laugh by spitting on my head while washing my hair. FML

by MonCoiffeurAdoré / 06/27/2012 at 10:43pm / Miscellaneous

Today, if you live in California, you might have seen a crazy drunk guy naked in front of a McDonald's, waving at everyone. Yeah, that was probably me. FML

by smh / 05/13/2012 at 6:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

by viviham / 05/04/2012 at 8:08am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I accidentally took my mouthwash like a shot. I don't know what burned more, when it went down or when it came back up. FML

by halfasleep / 03/27/2012 at 10:00am / United States (Connecticut) / Health

Today, my dad made me deliver a welcoming cake to our new neighbors. While I was making small-talk, I saw him climb over their backyard fence. A minute later, he climbed back over, with a plastic deck-chair in hand. I feel like an accessory to the pettiest theft in history. FML

by wtf dad / 03/02/2012 at 9:24pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML

by jess / 02/15/2012 at 12:47pm / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous