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minimammoth

Offline (the 11/21/2014 at 8:27am) | Search for a member

minimammoth

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 June 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1004
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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minimammoth's page activity

Visits<b>OhHeyItzNim</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 4:21pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 2:21am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 1:01pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 8:58pm<b>Semperfi92340</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 1:47pm<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 8:16am<b>eriicaaaf</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:13pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:54pm<b>snowaholicmxz</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:50pm<b>thedeej</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:22pm<b>gabix3</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 8:49pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:45pm<b>lovelypink7</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:41pm<b>Landesanity</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:37pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:04pm<b>AGB10</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 1:04am<b>dk1991</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 4:57pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 10:00am

minimammoth's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of minimammoth's badges

minimammoth's favorite FMLs

Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML

#20142294
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35002) - you deserved it (2516)

On 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm - kids - by ananymous - United States (New York)

Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML

#20119371
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32138) - you deserved it (18536)

On 10/16/2012 at 8:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML

#20116072
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23502) - you deserved it (4295)

On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)

Today, I completely shaved my head as a gesture for my boyfriend's mother, who was suffering from cancer and having a terrible time undergoing chemotherapy. Turns out she doesn't even have cancer, and my boyfriend thought I wouldn't have the guts to do it. FML

#20110360
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32819) - you deserved it (4814)

On 10/10/2012 at 11:05am - misc - by horriblejoke (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my cousin suddenly confided in me that he had tried to commit suicide by overdosing when he was 17. Shocked and not knowing how to respond, I blurted out, "Did it work?" FML

#20068483
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8714) - you deserved it (30390)

On 09/12/2012 at 1:40am - misc - by hahagirl (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. They jokingly asked me if I was only with him for his money. I didn't hear them properly so I just smiled and nodded. They now think I'm a gold digging bitch. FML

#20060240
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22990) - you deserved it (9369)

On 09/06/2012 at 8:46am - love - by Ashley - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I turned on the TV just in time to see my picture on the news. I have no idea what they said about me. FML

#20043967
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31170) - you deserved it (2613)

On 08/27/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by masterman - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found my husband's journal, and along with it the real reason he took so long to show up to our wedding rehearsals last year. According to the journal, it was because he was too busy wooing a married mother of five and sticking his "slut-banger all up in that fat booty." FML

#19965581
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29455) - you deserved it (2853)

On 07/20/2012 at 10:12pm - misc - by divorce? i think so (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

#19926709
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35102) - you deserved it (4383)

On 07/12/2012 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I caught my stylist in the mirror attempting to get his colleague to laugh by spitting on my head while washing my hair. FML

#19858220
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31639) - you deserved it (1901) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/27/2012 at 10:43pm - misc - by MonCoiffeurAdoré -

Today, if you live in California, you might have seen a crazy drunk guy naked in front of a McDonald's, waving at everyone. Yeah, that was probably me. FML

#19618137
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8761) - you deserved it (32348)

On 05/13/2012 at 6:30pm - misc - by smh (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

#19572319
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30841) - you deserved it (1933)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)

Today, I accidentally took my mouthwash like a shot. I don't know what burned more, when it went down or when it came back up. FML

#19356706
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17415) - you deserved it (12235)

On 03/27/2012 at 10:00am - health - by halfasleep (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my dad made me deliver a welcoming cake to our new neighbors. While I was making small-talk, I saw him climb over their backyard fence. A minute later, he climbed back over, with a plastic deck-chair in hand. I feel like an accessory to the pettiest theft in history. FML

#19205333
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23413) - you deserved it (1915)

On 03/02/2012 at 9:24pm - misc - by wtf dad (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML

#19085397
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26631) - you deserved it (1965)

On 02/15/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by jess (woman) - United States (Montana)



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