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knoll4007

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knoll4007
  • Town/Country : Singapore
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 July 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 637
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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knoll4007's last visitors

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It’s in the can

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knoll4007's favorite FMLs

Today, I was spending Saint Patrick's Day with my girlfriend, when she started pinching me for not wearing green. To my complete shock, when she pinched my nipple, I got the biggest, most noticeable erection I've ever had in my life, and no matter what I did, it wouldn't go away. We were in public. FML

#15355329
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38789) - you deserved it (8141)

On 03/17/2011 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by Mr. Sensitive Nips - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. Within seconds of getting my drink, I spilled it all over the table and my scarf. When the waiter was helping clean up the spill, he knocked over my boyfriend's drink. All over my pants. FML

#14999054
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25854) - you deserved it (4377)

On 02/16/2011 at 2:40am - misc - by Tori (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while sitting on the couch, my boyfriend came over, pulled his penis out of his fly, and started stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. FML

#14990668
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43129) - you deserved it (12559)

On 02/15/2011 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that the candy bracelet my sister gave me a few days ago was actually a candy cock ring she'd used on her boyfriend just a few hours prior. Apparently, she didn't like the taste. I however, did. FML

#14973308
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33310) - you deserved it (4002)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)

Today, I arranged to have some flowers delivered at work for Valentine's Day so that my colleagues will think someone likes me. FML

#14967945
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23705) - you deserved it (18406)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:34am - love - by alone (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got a parking ticket in the mail. I don't have a car. FML

#14967692
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29180) - you deserved it (2228)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by Roxas (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found some nude vintage pictures in my house. I decided to beat my meat to them. Later I found out it was my grandma. FML

#14583340
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14402) - you deserved it (71859)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:05pm - intimacy - by Gabriel A - United States (Ohio)

Today, a month after my 21st birthday, I received my health exam results. I don't remember the night of the birthday because I was hammered. However, I called my friend and it's now clear that the stripper they paid to have her way with me, had Chlamydia. FML

#14545291
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12952) - you deserved it (28431)

On 01/11/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized the birthmark I have on my chest isn't a birthmark at all; it's a third nipple. FML

#14534141
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34987) - you deserved it (3798)

On 01/10/2011 at 3:35pm - health - by triplenipple (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML

#14305984
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38591) - you deserved it (8374)

On 12/23/2010 at 1:36am - intimacy - by nemo518 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that if I try to resist a 70 pound bulldog that's humping my leg, I will end up with stitches. FML

#14294130
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22205) - you deserved it (2144)

On 12/22/2010 at 2:54am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, an attractive guy told me he wanted to get to know me and see me again. When I told my boyfriend, in hopes of stirring up some jealousy, he said "he'll regret it when he finds out what you're like in bed, trust me." FML

#14282148
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19137) - you deserved it (36021)

On 12/21/2010 at 4:38am - intimacy - by fail (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, after an argument with a coworker, I sent him "Sorry about being such a jerk" in a reply to a mass email he had sent. I accidentally hit 'Reply All'. I now have 32 "It's okay" messages in my inbox. FML

#14274889
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6987) - you deserved it (23231)

On 12/20/2010 at 5:26pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out my girlfriend of four years is legally married to a man in prison. He gets out next week. FML

#14254809
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38702) - you deserved it (3245)

On 12/19/2010 at 12:14am - love - by fouryearswasted - United States

Today, I saw Saw IV with my boyfriend. He held me close and said, "I'll protect you." A few seconds later, he jumped up so violently, he gave me a bloody nose, and ran screaming out of the room. FML

#14248345
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28545) - you deserved it (3349)

On 12/18/2010 at 2:14pm - love - by asdfghjkl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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