Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 15 April 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6568
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About jadeluv : Dude, stop being a stalker and just message me already (:

jadeluv's page activity

Visits<b>cameronaka</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 1:56am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 10:07pm<b>blcksocks</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 5:17pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:36pm<b>nygiantsfan85</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 4:46pm<b>ibChase714</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 6:19pm<b>tyler_jay</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 12:34pm<b>mexeuphemism</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:15am<b>HelloMatey</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 10:29am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 5:18pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 3:55pm<b>flupsht</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 8:28am<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 11:18pm<b>mookie10</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 10:03pm<b>Madridsta</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 11:23pm<b>ImagineCrazy</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 6:09am<b>saba_ajira</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 5:45am<b>Faddyy6</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 3:55am

Liked!<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 7:16am<b>mookie10</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 5:39pm<b>24jfred</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 5:54am<b>baseball27LD</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 2:02am<b>Zacky_Chan</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 10:56am<b>apgreen69</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 2:58am<b>pratikp03</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 12:53pm<b>IamHercules</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 5:38am<b>_just_joshin_ya</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 3:41am<b>cutiegirl12326</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 7:25pm<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 12:46am<b>Noah_Lynx</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 4:24am<b>Stoppy23</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 9:49pm<b>nathansmith1211</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 5:47pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:18pm<b>WhiteCrimson</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 10:51am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 1:23pm<b>sevazilla</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 1:11pm

jadeluv's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of jadeluv's badges

jadeluv's favorite FMLs

Today, I was using the urinal when another guy came in. His friends decided to scare him while he was using the urinal next to mine. They jumped out at him, he turned around and ended up peeing all over me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49287) - you deserved it (2851)

On 07/19/2013 at 12:29am - misc - by the unfortunate man - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at the park playing Frisbee with my friends, when I saw a boy sitting on a bench looking rather sad. "Hey!" I yelled, and he looked up at me. I lightly threw the Frisbee in his direction, and it hit him in the face. He was blind. FML


I agree, your life sucks (54777) - you deserved it (17072)

On 07/17/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by WasntMe - United States

Today, trying to be funny in front of some friends, I held my cat above my head Lion King style. The height must have made him nervous, because he shat on my head. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28421) - you deserved it (50584)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML


I agree, your life sucks (57352) - you deserved it (6796)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44405) - you deserved it (32470) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/16/2013 at 9:18am - health - by Aliiiice (woman) - France (Haute-Normandie)

Today, I baked strawberry muffins for my family, putting half a strawberry on each of them. Only when it was too late did I realize that they looked like extremely creepy breasts. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35559) - you deserved it (6820)

On 07/16/2013 at 8:01am - misc - by muffin (woman) - Austria

Today, my naked boyfriend walked up to me with my towel around his neck and with a hard-on, then declared he was "The Penis Man" and slapped me with his junk. I thought I was dating a man, not a man-child. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49727) - you deserved it (17045)

On 07/14/2013 at 1:03pm - intimacy - by peniswoman (woman) - United Kingdom (Renfrewshire)

Today, I announced my third pregnancy to my family. My dad's only reaction was to scoff, "Really? Stop breeding already." FML


I agree, your life sucks (43574) - you deserved it (14377)

On 07/13/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when a girl came out of nowhere, screaming at me for cheating on her, and saying she was dumping me. I've never seen her before, and she was almost grinning during her little act, but my girlfriend believed it, and I'm now single. FML


I agree, your life sucks (65927) - you deserved it (3787)

On 07/13/2013 at 1:33pm - love - by fuckingtrollingskankwhoreshitwankcuntfuck (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML


I agree, your life sucks (52350) - you deserved it (21160)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59030) - you deserved it (10880)

On 07/04/2013 at 3:03am - intimacy - by Never Going Back To The Doctor (woman) - United States

Today, I tried acid for the first time while camping with my best friend. A drunk driver smashed into my car, leaving it totaled. I had to explain the situation to a cop all while thinking my car was bleeding green ooze. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25201) - you deserved it (64715)

On 07/02/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was accused of shooting drugs at work. I was only feeding a baby bird that was tucked into my arm using a medicine syringe. I've been smuggling it to work because it has to eat every 2 hours or it will starve. Now everyone there thinks I'm a hardcore dope fiend. FML


I agree, your life sucks (45485) - you deserved it (8200)

On 06/27/2013 at 7:56pm - animals - by Gribby - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML


I agree, your life sucks (80955) - you deserved it (7394)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my neighbor knocked on my door to borrow my laundry room key. He was bare-ass naked. When I refused to open the door, he tried to break it down. I had to call the police before he would leave. FML

Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: