About irgndsondepp : Studying physics in Germany, playing guitar and sucking at life!
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irgndsondepp's favorite FMLs
Today, I went in for my 2nd day working at my internship. My bosses greeted me and told me we were going to have a meeting. The meeting was to listen to the drunk voicemails I left them on Saturday. FML
by Noname / 02/16/2009 at 1:23pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, I was instructed by my boss to welcome the 2 new foreign business partners since I am the only one who could speak their language. When they arrived I greeted them in their language. One of them scratched his head and asked his companion in plain and clear English, "What did he say?" FML
by Salaryman / 02/15/2009 at 1:21am / Philippines (Rizal) / Work
Today, I'm in Spain, and told the kids with whom I will be working that I was excited to be working with them. Only the form of excitement I used apparently refers to sexual excitement. Basically, I told the kids I was sexually aroused to be working with them. FML
by thegoldenboy3 / 02/12/2009 at 7:14am / Spain (Andalucia) / Intimacy
by Evil_Egbert / 02/12/2009 at 6:54am / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Intimacy
Today, a girl entered the public washroom I was washing my hands in. When she saw me, she stopped dead in her tracks. I then saw her go to the door to make sure she was actually in the girl's washroom. FML
by a manly woman? / 02/09/2009 at 6:57pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I auditioned for the musical at my school. Before I sang my song, I gave my music to the director. She said "Oh, I love this song!". After I sang it, she told me, "Its okay, I still like the song." FML
by None / 02/08/2009 at 12:18pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I thought I was going on a date. About 20 minutes into it, after giving her my arm to hold (like a true gentleman) it came up in conversation that my brother is gay. Her response: "oh, so both you and your brother are gay?" FML
by max / 02/07/2009 at 6:33pm / United States (New York) / Love
Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone pulled the fire alarm, and my boyfriend couldn't find the key. So he left me, and the Resident Advisor found me. The fireman had to cut the chain. FML
by hahahehehohohoo / 02/06/2009 at 10:55pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I woke up to my car covered in shaving cream and tampons and the word CHEATER written on my windshield in lipstick. The guy a few doors down from me in my dorm has the same car as me. I'm a virgin. FML
by CB4 / 02/05/2009 at 5:34pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation
by Noname / 02/04/2009 at 6:23am / Canada (Alberta) / Animals
by leez / 02/01/2009 at 5:43am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was discussing my family heritage with my girlfriend's parents. The moment I told them that I came from a German background, her seven-year-old brother pointed at me and yelled, "HITLER!" FML
by razzmataz / 01/28/2009 at 8:38am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was hitting on a girl that was getting ready to walk into the same class as I. We were waiting outside the room, and I told her that I heard the Professor for the course was a total bitch. We walked into the room. I sat down in a desk. She stood behind the podium. FML
by footinmouth / 01/21/2009 at 6:15pm / United States (Iowa) / Love
Today, I have -$700 in my current account, $500 from overdraft fees because I spent money they told me I had. I don't get paid till the 15th and when I cash in my paycheck all of it will go to bringing me even. So the $9 I found in my wallet this morning will have to last me untill the 30th. FML
by Celina / 01/12/2009 at 4:55am / United States (California) / Money
Today, I invited a girl I really like to spend the afternoon at my place. Everything went great... with my sister. They became really good friends, and me, well, I tried to alleviate my boredom in front of my computer. FML