bryan788

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bryan788

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4216
  • Number of comments : 173
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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bryan788's page activity

Visits<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 12:44am<b>aimbug</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 1:20pm<b>Googolman</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 2:16pm<b>that_average_guy</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 2:48am<b>Steffi3</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 6:42am<b>dtbaby01</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 7:35pm<b>TypoFairy</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:14am<b>miguelghs</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 5:55am<b>Gingerness23</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 2:34am<b>xnyletak</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 1:20am<b>troubledlace</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 10:19pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 7:51pm<b>Sriehl</b> - the 10/23/2013 at 11:32am<b>Oihana</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 5:45pm<b>angelitared</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 10:01pm<b>toaster012</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 5:04pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 7:37pm<b>loriprieto</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 10:59am

bryan788's FML badges

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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bryan788's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking to this guy that I like a lot and I think he likes me back. When he told me I was beautiful I laughed so hard that I farted. Loudly. FML

by ECullen / 05/21/2009 at 3:13pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I installed high performance brakes on my car after fearing that my old brake system was to weak and I could get into a crash. On the test drive a car in front of me stopped short. My new brakes worked, the ones on the car behind me didn't. I now have whiplash and a totalled car. FML

by Lex / 05/11/2009 at 11:13pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was running a cute guy was coming towards me. As he was passing me, he yelled "nice tush!" I said thanks and slapped my ass flirtatiously. He stopped running, laughed and pointed to my crotch, replying "No, I said nice BUSH" I looked down to see my shorts had rode up a bit too high. FML

by schmoodles / 05/06/2009 at 8:20pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I worked a car wash as a fundraiser. Being nice I figured I'd bring my car, get it washed, and donate some money. When it was my car's turn to be washed, everyone was conveniently busy washing other cars. My car was in front and needed to be washed and moved. I paid $10 to wash my own car. FML

by fail / 04/26/2009 at 1:38am / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, I received two withdrawl grades in school for droping the classes due to a kidney infection that kept me in the hospital. I wrote a petition to the dean asking to remove the grades. He replied to send a doctor's note. I did this, and he said that I was faking and the note was forged. FML

by snoozer / 03/23/2009 at 2:12am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 12:46am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I saw an attractive man outside the club I was trying to get into to. We talked, and ended up having sex in my apartment. The next day when I was dropping him off, I discovered he was homeless and was outside the club begging for money. My house is suddenly out of bread and cheese. FML

by Melaknee / 03/18/2009 at 8:10pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I was going to attempt to compliment my girlfriend, I planned on telling her that she smelled really nice. In a loving tone, I confidently told her, "Baby, you have a certain stench to you." FML

by DSM / 03/14/2009 at 7:05am / United States (North Dakota) / Love

Today, I arrived at work only to be arrested and accused of stealing over $8000 from my job. 5 hours later at the police station, the discovery was made that the actual thief had an employee ID one digit different than mine. He works at another location over 1200 miles away. FML

by Jong / 03/09/2009 at 10:35pm / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, at the dentist, I was getting my teeth cleaned. Looking up at his nose, I saw runny snot dripping onto his lip. I tried to slowly move away. He told me "Stop!" The movement of his lips caused the snot to fall right into my mouth. FML

by Noname / 03/05/2009 at 2:44pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, I went on a blind date that my sister had set up. When I arrived at the coffeeshop, I approached a man waiting by the counter, asking if his name was Tim (my date's name). He looked at me and said no and then left with a drink clearly labeled "Tim" in bold letters. FML

by oprahahaha / 03/01/2009 at 11:20pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I drove into my school. Literally drove into my school. FML

by shilpajayseanfan / 02/24/2009 at 8:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, when I visited my grandmother at her nursing home, I was looking at pictures she had of all the grandkids. All were normal graduation pictures etc. but mine was a cutout where she made me skinnier. FML

by Noname / 02/18/2009 at 4:55pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was pressed for time, I opened some canned food for dinner. When my children were served, they said, "Mmm, this is best meal you've ever cooked for us!" I cook healthy, balanced meals every day. FML

by Lola / 12/20/2008 at 7:23am / Kids