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birdfreak

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birdfreak

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13067
  • Number of comments : 496
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About birdfreak : Stuff about me is supposed to go here, but I have nothing interesting to say...
Have a lovely day!

birdfreak's page activity

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birdfreak's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of birdfreak's badges

birdfreak's favorite FMLs

Today, I got my wisdom teeth out. My doctor said it was okay to eat, so, I had some mashed potatoes. Apparently, my body disagreed with the doctor, because I threw up. Because my face was so swollen, it didn't make it out my mouth. It went through my nose instead. I literally blew chunks. FML

Today, I received in the mail a hockey puck autographed by recent hall of fame addition Steve Yzerman. When asked, I had to explain to my 4 year old brother that someone famous had written his name on it. Later, I discovered that my brother decided it needed his name on it too. FML

#3156844
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41513) - you deserved it (4831)

On 06/23/2009 at 9:28pm - kids - by lumi (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while reading some chemistry notes I came across the term "solid water". Completely stumped, I asked myself, "What the hell is solid water?" Then I heard my little cousin say "ice." I'm a 4th year science major in university. He still checks the closet for monsters. FML

#3142518
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28440) - you deserved it (80694)

On 06/23/2009 at 10:19am - work - by uneek14 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I ran into an old student of mine at the grocery store. She didn't recognize me at first so I introduced myself as her old teacher. She looked taken aback for a moment, and then said, "Oh my God... you're still alive?" FML

#3141332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53230) - you deserved it (3980)

On 06/23/2009 at 7:31am - misc - by feelinblue (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I ran into an old student of mine at the grocery store. She didn't recognize me at first so I introduced myself as her old teacher. She looked taken aback for a moment, and then said, "Oh my God... you're still alive?" FML

#3141332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53230) - you deserved it (3980)

On 06/23/2009 at 7:31am - misc - by feelinblue (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I spent 4 hours carefully cleaning the inside and outside of my car. Fairly proud of the job I had done, I parked my car safely in my garage. Later, I opened my garage to find bird shit all over my car. Apparently birds get nervous when they get trapped in garages. FML

#3096278
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39322) - you deserved it (5056)

On 06/21/2009 at 5:41pm - animals - by FML (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. While I was at the store, an employee came up to me and said, "You're beautiful!" When I came home I told my husband what had just happened. My husband then asked, "What was wrong with him?" FML

#2999612
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50556) - you deserved it (5060)

On 06/18/2009 at 3:40pm - love - by Ann (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my left-handed boss needed PC help. I said "right-click for the menu." She said nothing happened. Three times we went through this. Eventually I went over, asking her to show me what she did. She was using her right hand on the left mouse button. She earns £10,000 more than me. FML

#2798980
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61956) - you deserved it (3264)

On 06/11/2009 at 11:21am - work - by girlfriday (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I had just a few dominoes left to complete the whole project that I've been working on for about three weeks. I pressed record on my video camera, flicked the first domino, and watched with pride. When it finished, I realized I hadn't actually pressed record. FML

#2766675
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46918) - you deserved it (30470)

On 06/10/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by DamnDominoes (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, I busted my ass to help this old lady move her stuff because she was going to a nursing home. I was told I would get paid. When I finished four hours later the lady took me to a room and told me to pick out anything in her little goody bag. I got a race car as payment. FML

#2766394
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50996) - you deserved it (9054)

On 06/10/2009 at 7:03am - work - by person (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was playing paintball when I noticed a 9 year old fat kid sitting and crying on the ground. Thinking he'd fallen and was hurt, I walked over to him. He looks up and shoots me in the face, arm, stomach, and happy sacks area from 4 feet away then runs off. He was not hurt at all, and now everything tastes like paint. FML

#2734001
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47519) - you deserved it (8249)

On 06/09/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Woody - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I woke up hungover and thirsty, I found a glass of water next to the sink, filled it up with more water, chugged it and went back to bed. I woke up an hour later to my best friend telling me she thought she lost her contacts. They were in a glass next to the sink. I ate her contacts. FML

#2711154
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30682) - you deserved it (40402)

On 06/08/2009 at 2:54am - misc - by KBO (woman) - Australia

Today, I walked to Starbucks. On the way a homeless guy asked me for change and I lied and said I had no money. On my way back, Strawberry Frappuccino in hand, the same guy recognized me. He followed me for 3 blocks, swearing and yelling at me. FML

#2695663
450 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26408) - you deserved it (57000)

On 06/07/2009 at 4:46pm - misc - by Jebus (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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