alyspar2

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alyspar2

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1877
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

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alyspar2's page activity

Visits<b>MisterKnowItAll</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 7:36am<b>UnknownTracker</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 1:55pm<b>lilferrit</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 3:45am<b>JazzHandsFML</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 7:08pm<b>DaniloDanigga</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 8:56pm<b>zingline89</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 12:19am<b>markcallanan_</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 11:13am<b>laurenasabutton</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 12:43pm<b>TheKidOnFire</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 5:44pm<b>Dory123</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 2:31pm<b>theawkwardlife</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 9:34am<b>Mornai</b> - the 03/07/2012 at 6:25pm

alyspar2's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of alyspar2's badges

alyspar2's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML

by Anonymous / 03/01/2013 at 2:18am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, after nearly six weeks of seeing a nice girl, we finally decided to make it official. Two hours later, she pulled out a bridal magazine and not-so-casually asked me which wedding location I thought was the nicest. FML

by Anonymous / 02/22/2013 at 12:14pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Love

Today, my fiancé spent three hours arguing with his mom about how Scientology is a cult followed by simple-minded asshats; she shouted at him saying Xenu will come and fuck his shit up for not believing. This woman is going to be my children's grandmother. FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2012 at 3:54am / South Africa / Miscellaneous

Today, I injured myself in the geekiest way possible; I managed to crush my nipple while closing my laptop. FML

by Display / 09/27/2012 at 12:10am / Health

Today, I went for my follow-up appointment with my surgeon. He walked into the room and said, "I thought you died." FML

by Missusluv313 / 09/17/2012 at 7:25am / United States (Indiana) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my book bag was so heavy that it set off my car's passenger detection system in the front seat. I had to buckle in my textbooks. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 12:05pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I turned on the TV just in time to see my picture on the news. I have no idea what they said about me. FML

by masterman / 08/27/2012 at 2:45am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2012 at 8:20pm / United States / Love

Today, my girlfriend said that we should try something new. I got excited because I thought it would be about sex. Nope, she wanted me to start speaking with animal noises so we could build up a secret language. FML

by SwAGkiLlS / 07/15/2012 at 11:12am / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, my mom came over to me and whispered something in my ear. I didn't hear it and assumed it was a joke, so I started laughing. Turns out my aunt died. FML

by RIP / 07/15/2012 at 1:02am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my over-protective husband went into an extreme fit of jealousy at the sight of me breast-feeding our newborn baby boy. He's trying to make me bottle-feed our boy, because apparently it's "wrong" to let another guy touch my boobs. FML

by wife of a shithead / 07/06/2012 at 1:44pm / Norway (Oslo) / Love

Today, I'm going to court to give an eyewitness account of a robbery. Unfortunately, I had a wacky dream last night concerning the robbery, and no longer have any idea of what actually happened in real life. FML

by Dreamer / 07/03/2012 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to have a long and awkward meeting with my boss. It wouldn't have been too awkward though, if I didn't have to avoid staring at her exposed breast whilst she fed her 8 week old baby. FML

by Wubba87 / 06/27/2012 at 6:32am / United Kingdom (Liverpool) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2012 at 6:08pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Intimacy

Today, my boss grabbed my arm, raised it above my head, closed my other hand into a fist, and pushed it into his armpit. After staring at me for several seconds, he winked and left without saying a word. This isn't the weirdest thing he's done, and I'm actually starting to fear for my safety. FML

by thinkimquitting / 06/25/2012 at 5:49pm / Australia (Victoria) / Work