TheCerealKiller

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Offline (the 06/22/2016 at 5:31am)

TheCerealKiller

24Fucked!

TheCerealKiller
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 October 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2566
  • Number of comments : 126
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 38 posted

About TheCerealKiller : I am a serial cereal killer.

TheCerealKiller's page activity

Visits<b>JulietMarie</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 9:13pm<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 1:01am<b>wafflelover</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 5:55pm<b>sammy011</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 8:02pm<b>TheAspieDork</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 11:38am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 12:06am<b>TheOneButNotOnly</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 3:30pm<b>Wontonfon</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 1:38pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 5:56am<b>zr11990</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 1:17am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 8:11pm<b>AcidBurn84</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 12:27pm<b>dman30</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 10:02am<b>dcam13</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 4:10am<b>edmunson</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 12:50am<b>brittanyleann72</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 11:39pm<b>marshm610</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 11:38pm<b>BenHalf</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 10:49pm

Fucked!<b>wafflelover</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 3:52pm<b>TheOneButNotOnly</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 9:30pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 11:56am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 2:11am<b>dcam13</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 10:11am<b>Tenker</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 4:47am<b>nicolai44</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 4:42am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 7:12pm<b>pratikp03</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 3:45pm<b>kyle_s_97</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 1:56pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 12:50pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 12:36pm<b>JusstJef</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 11:12am<b>Envy22</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 1:32am<b>arano</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 5:04pm<b>Candygrl987</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 12:41am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 10:26pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 6:17pm

TheCerealKiller's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of TheCerealKiller's badges

TheCerealKiller's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss heard a rumor that I was in a relationship with a fellow co-worker. He assured me that inside relationships weren't against any store policy, so I confirmed it. He then fired my boyfriend anyway. FML

by thankssomuch / 12/16/2014 at 10:31pm / United States (Maine) / Work

Today, my mother took me to go and see my grandfather, who I hadn't seen since I was 4. The first thing he said to me was, "Pfwoarr, look at those tits." FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2014 at 5:34am / Australia / Intimacy

Today, I was watching TV with my mom, when a plumbing ad came on. A hot guy showed up on-screen and said "I'm here to snake your drain." My mom immediately piped up with, "Oh, I'd let him snake my drain any day." Thanks for that imagery, mom. FML

by disgusted / 10/04/2012 at 7:24pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML

by Anonymous / 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML

by Anonymous / 10/02/2012 at 1:01am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to look for the horrid stench coming from my bathroom. It turns out my roommate has been throwing away her used tampons in the "trashcan by the sink." That "trashcan" is my old antique vase. FML

by raesos91 / 09/18/2012 at 7:56am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was at work, a coworker began ranting about his theory that the government is going to create a disease that sterilises everyone, and use the antidote to control the population. I was just trying to take a crap in the stall next to him. FML

by Pooping / 08/29/2012 at 3:19pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML

by kaitlyna15 / 07/31/2012 at 9:54pm / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I paid a social visit to my grandparents. While we were watching the news, a story came on about the Queen of England. I scoffed, "How is she not dead already? How old is she, anyway?" My grandmother replied, "About my age." Oops. FML

by Anonymous / 07/08/2012 at 5:13pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend showed off her new tattoo, which is supposed to say "bad bitch" in Italian, and I had to point out that it actually says "defective female". Her response was to cuss me out and inform me that I'm no longer part of her social circle. FML

by tubby / 06/21/2012 at 4:28pm / Sweden (Blekinge Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the circus with my family. When we were looking at the animals during the break, an elephant took my purse with his trunk and ate it. It crushed my cellphone, camera, keys and wallet. After that, the circus director yelled at me for feeding poisonous stuff to his elephant. FML

by ILoveAnimals / 06/11/2012 at 3:14am / Austria (Wien) / Animals

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

by lafinesse / 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he would still love me if I became a vegetable. His response: "Well, the sex wouldn't be any different." FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 7:35am / United States / Intimacy

Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML

by gottalovefriends / 04/23/2012 at 12:04am / United States (New Hampshire) / Love

Today, my anxiety was so bad that when I was riding my bike on the side walk and two pedestrians came walking in the opposite direction, I got so nervous about having to go between them or accidentally hitting them that I fell off my bike, into a bush. FML

by sydstreet / 04/09/2012 at 1:31am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous