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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
GRgoldfish's favorite FMLs
by SmittyJA24 / 05/19/2014 at 10:38pm / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous
by fat girl / 04/29/2014 at 6:58pm / United States (Alaska) / Work
Today, I decided to clean my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML
by Shiva / 03/18/2014 at 4:46am / France (Poitou-Charentes) / Animals
Today, I met my boyfriend's adoptive family. There was his mom and several brothers, one of whom tried to hit on me. They tried to convince my boyfriend to break up with me, and his mom told me I'll probably get knocked up by the brother who hit on me. FML
by Anonymous / 03/01/2014 at 1:09am / Australia (Victoria) / Love
Today, I left for work. Halfway to my car, my neighbour's son jumped out and emptied a bucket of water all over me. The little pissant screamed with laughter and ran back to his house. His mum's reaction was essentially "kids will be kids" and slamming the door on me. FML
by HeMayHaveSomeIssues / 02/28/2014 at 3:01pm / Denmark / Kids
by awkward / 02/22/2014 at 12:39am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was doing a science presentation about glucose. There was around 20 judges at the event who could've judged me, but instead I got judged by the only person in the whole entire world who doesn't know what glucose is and doesn't think it exists. FML
by anonymous / 02/20/2014 at 12:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by Twix88 / 02/19/2014 at 6:00am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML
by chinaski7628 / 02/15/2014 at 2:11am / United States (California) / Work
Today, I found out the real reason my boyfriend kept starting fights with me, and why my best friend kept telling me to break up with him. It was so they could turn their affair into a proper relationship, then twist it around to make me look like a bitch for dumping him. FML
by Anonymous / 02/12/2014 at 4:25pm / Australia / Love
Today, my house is on lockdown. I recently moved to Georgia from Rhode Island to be with my boyfriend. The state is on high alert for an ice storm. I'm stuck inside with my terrified boyfriend, who's calling it "the storm of the century". I used to walk to school in this weather. FML
by Stuck / 02/12/2014 at 1:25pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my girlfriend out to a vegetarian-friendly restaurant. She ordered shrimp fettuccine, and I asked why. She slowly explained to me that vegetarians can eat shrimp, then muttered that she now knows who has the brains in our relationship. FML
by not even getting any of her shrimp / 02/11/2014 at 4:50pm / United States (Utah) / Love
Today, at work, a customer asked me to unlock the restroom for them. I honestly couldn't figure out which gender they were, but I didn't want to be rude and ask, so I took a chance. I unlocked the wrong one. FML
by elizabethkalyn / 02/10/2014 at 3:48pm / United States (Indiana) / Work
by Anonymous / 02/06/2014 at 6:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I presented my child with the classic "Who came first, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. In return, I got a detailed lecture on how birds evolved from dinosaurs, how life was created in the sea and an explanation about evolution. I got schooled by a 9 year old. FML
by Evolution mama / 02/05/2014 at 2:52pm / Iceland (Gullbringusysla) / Kids