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BimmerDriver

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BimmerDriver
  • Town/Country : Sheffield, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 1 June 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 844
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 8 posted

About BimmerDriver : Hello, my name is Taylor and i'm 18 years young. I check FML about once or twice a day on my phone when I get bored. I love BMWs. I drive a 1995 BMW M5, a 2011 BMW 335xi, and a 2005 Land Rover Range Rover. I bought them with my own hard earned money and hope to one day own new models of both. (Although the e34 M5 is sexier than any new BMW in my opinion).

Edit:
Sadly my e34 M5 is currently replaced by an e38 740i

BimmerDriver's last visitors

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BimmerDriver's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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BimmerDriver's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my uncle's funeral. I wasn't very close with him, but I still wanted to be respectful. My boyfriend, being the jackass that he is, was singing the Spider Pig song from The Simpsons under his breath while making his fingers walk up my leg, trying to get under my skirt. FML

#20096195
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20815) - you deserved it (5895)

On 10/01/2012 at 12:23am - love - by SorryUncleTommy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my wife of four years revealed to me that she once had sex with six men at once back in college. Apparently she still fantasizes about it when we have sex. FML

#20087984
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30461) - you deserved it (3115)

On 09/25/2012 at 11:09am - intimacy - by supapimpin (man) - United States

Today, I fell asleep at work and woke up with penis sharpied on my face. I'm a kindergarten teacher. FML

#20087243
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14302) - you deserved it (27367)

On 09/24/2012 at 9:51pm - kids - by Fingkids - United States

Today, I stumbled across "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" on TV and realized that these awful freaks are going to make more money than I ever will. FML

#20070573
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23235) - you deserved it (2375)

On 09/13/2012 at 6:29pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, I found out why my District Manager won't promote me to store manager; his wife thinks he's having an affair with me. If he promotes me, she will take that as evidence of the affair, and then will threaten to divorce him. FML

#20045096
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20243) - you deserved it (1211)

On 08/27/2012 at 8:09pm - work - by Mandi (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my neighbors are moving. As we were saying our goodbyes, their 12-year-old son approached and thanked me for the times I forgot to shut the blinds and he watched me change. FML

#19945004
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15005) - you deserved it (24151)

On 07/16/2012 at 10:38am - kids - by oops123 (woman) - United States

Today, I spent the day crying, and ate McDonald's for my Christmas dinner. FML

#18613200
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37855) - you deserved it (4770)

On 12/26/2011 at 1:33am - misc - by Holly Jolly (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking to the store when I ran into one of my friends. He said he heard about my bike being stolen the day before, and that whoever took it was a heartless dick. I hadn't told anyone about the theft. FML

#17231826
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39280) - you deserved it (2677)

On 07/23/2011 at 5:27pm - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I ran into my ex's family, and found out they are going to Europe. Funnily enough, so am I. Even funnier is the fact that we are going on the same date, at the same time, on the same flights, and the tour starts on the same day in the same place. FML

#7810675
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28645) - you deserved it (2482)

On 02/02/2010 at 9:08am - misc - by jacques (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found my boyfriend making out with my mom. FML

#7490494
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61965) - you deserved it (3944)

On 01/22/2010 at 12:02am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I woke up in my boyfriend's dorm and decided to take a shower before he woke up. I used the girls bathroom on the above floor, and afterwards just threw on a towel and ran to the elevator. I forgot to press my boyfriend's floor and I was taken to the lobby in a towel. People were waiting. FML

#7344260
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4390) - you deserved it (19498)

On 01/14/2010 at 7:43pm - misc - by nude (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at the bar and my friend and I were making fun of this guy wearing a Affliction muscle tee and bedazzled Ed Hardy hat. We were saying how he was the epitome of a douche bag and that he probably likes UFC. Turns out he's an MMA fighter and I now have a broken nose. FML

#4827023
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8226) - you deserved it (57243)

On 08/26/2009 at 12:40am - misc - by brokennose (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

#4630669
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (107793) - you deserved it (8044)

On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States

Today, I found out that my brother was selling pictures of me showering. For what? World of Warcraft money. FML

#4073449
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59279) - you deserved it (3319)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:32am - misc - by Anon (woman) - Singapore



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