Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Arni792

Online | Search for a member

Arni792

31Liked!

Arni792Arni792
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 7 July 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4998
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Arni792's page activity

Visits<b>EmmaRey</b> - 16 hours ago<b>Mukuro</b> - yesterday at 7:32pm<b>odessarose</b> - yesterday at 6:48pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - yesterday at 6:32pm<b>kikoma</b> - yesterday at 1:54pm<b>MattBenid</b> - yesterday at 11:57am<b>annarcheer</b> - yesterday at 8:27am<b>DestinyNiya</b> - yesterday at 2:39am<b>ETwilleatyou</b> - yesterday at 1:35am<b>latinablanca</b> - yesterday at 12:36am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - yesterday at 11:56pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 8:07pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 7:09pm<b>cookiethumper</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 7:03pm<b>kjax</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 6:04pm<b>Cloco98</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 5:49pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 9:47am<b>horrorbabe1408</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 8:05pm

Liked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - 22 hours ago<b>ETwilleatyou</b> - yesterday at 7:36am<b>kjax</b> - yesterday at 11:04pm<b>Cloco98</b> - yesterday at 10:49pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 2:47pm<b>EclipseCandy6</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 12:27am<b>awkwardeer</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 4:36am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 12:56pm<b>charrbee90</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:31am<b>EmsyyyRose13</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 10:27am<b>Ki11erRabbit</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 8:52am<b>ForeverSilent101</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 4:30am<b>juststephhere</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 1:15am<b>xninix</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 7:25am<b>iireenee</b> - the 02/13/2015 at 9:44pm<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 6:41pm<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 4:38pm<b>ashleyyeah</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 6:46am

Arni792's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Arni792's badges

Arni792's favorite FMLs

Today, I faced my social anxiety and went to a chip shop on my own. I tried to have a conversation with the owner, but his thick accent made it difficult. He now knows where I live, what college I go to and I'm pretty sure I agreed to go to India with him. FML

#21096939
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37878) - you deserved it (7633)

On 03/26/2014 at 2:06pm - misc - by sociallyawkward (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

#21095689
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48109) - you deserved it (12245)

On 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm - misc - by dani (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I ripped my old, worn underwear while trying to pick a wedgie in public. Half ended up in my hand. FML

#21095019
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31698) - you deserved it (19947)

On 03/24/2014 at 8:39am - misc - by pantyripper (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my dad decided to shave his beard. I told him I wanted him to keep it, so he took the shavings, put them in a jar, and left it in my room. FML

#21093737
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35271) - you deserved it (12180)

On 03/22/2014 at 7:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was walking through the main lobby at school and I saw someone waving at me, so I waved back. Turns out she was just cleaning a glass door. I heard laughter behind me. FML

#21085559
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39254) - you deserved it (5921)

On 03/13/2014 at 7:59am - misc - by Crochocinco85 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out what a lightweight my girlfriend is. After having a couple of drinks, she began flirting, then grabbed my ass. She felt around a bit before freaking out and asking where my penis was. FML

#21067583
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49345) - you deserved it (5691)

On 02/21/2014 at 12:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I went on a blind date. At the end of the night, I told him I had a surprisingly great time. He replied, "Yeah, that was fun. You're really funny and smart. If you were pretty, I'd totally go out with you again." FML

#21064082
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54488) - you deserved it (4851)

On 02/18/2014 at 12:45am - love - by fiercehawk (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after 3 months of no orgasms, I was in the shower, working to rectify that. As I was seconds away from coming, my dad loudly knocked on the door and demanded to know how much longer I was going to take. Probably another 3 months now, dad. FML

#21039460
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52393) - you deserved it (8862)

On 01/25/2014 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by sally - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. After a while, he started staring at my lady parts, and said my "vag looks like a mockingjay". He then stretched the lips apart like wings and made little "CA-CAW CA-CAW!" sounds. FML

#21033383
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58493) - you deserved it (9409)

On 01/19/2014 at 10:59pm - intimacy - by Goodyear (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49122) - you deserved it (6466)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I announced my pregnancy to my husband. He responded with, "Well shit, when do these faucets turn on?" and started honking my boobs. FML

#21006112
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37443) - you deserved it (5216)

On 12/26/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, a kid from my school called me, saying he's going on vacation to Japan soon and that since I was born there, I could teach him the language. His exact words at the start of the call were: "Hey man, you speak Asian, right?" I have to be around this shithead 5 days a week. FML

#20992530
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43362) - you deserved it (3560)

On 12/14/2013 at 5:39pm - misc - by bnc (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I saw a psychiatrist for the first time. After telling her everything I'm going through, she looked at me and said "You know... every five years or so I get a case completely beyond my ability to help." I guess it's been five years. FML

#20963305
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45632) - you deserved it (2988)

On 11/19/2013 at 12:31pm - health - by elle (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend of three years sent me a text message saying "It's over!". I sent him maybe a thousand texts saying "Why?", "What do you mean?!" After an hour of crying and whatnot, I realized he had driver's education today and that he was saying the class was over. FML

#20959504
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30355) - you deserved it (45462)

On 11/16/2013 at 5:06am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend's response to me saying "Most women like a bit of filth in the bedroom every now and again" was to start farting in bed. Not quite what I meant. FML

#20946422
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44379) - you deserved it (10703)

On 11/05/2013 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by roughsexgonewrong (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: