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September 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML

#21250726
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48671) - you deserved it (2458)

On 09/02/2014 at 7:38pm - misc - by SadAndDeaf -

Today, after years of wonderful flying experiences, I boarded a flight and took my seat only to find a baby sitting in front of me, behind me, and to the right of me, and across the aisle from me. All of whom decided to cry in unison. It was a 9-hour flight. FML

#21249416
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46745) - you deserved it (3538)

On 09/01/2014 at 12:34am - misc - by MLeguillon - United States (Missouri)

Today, I got a call about a job interview, saying I was hired. I was ecstatic, until they called me back and said they'd called the wrong applicant. They called again later, saying there'd been a mistake and I really was hired. When I went in to confirm it, they said they'd never heard of me. FML

#21252552
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44795) - you deserved it (2481)

On 09/05/2014 at 6:02pm - work - by almost governmental (woman) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, I went out with my best friend to McDonald's for a late night snack. Turns out she lied to me and just used me to pick up the boy she likes so they could go stargazing. I'm now laying beside them as they look at the stars and make out. I just want fries. FML

#21249351
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43427) - you deserved it (4354)

On 08/31/2014 at 10:55pm - love - by emilyparker - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

#21252700
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43067) - you deserved it (2590)

On 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm - work - by crop circle galore - United States

Today, my mother yelled at me for not doing all of my homework. She got so mad, she tore up a drawing I'd spent over a week working on. That was my art homework. FML

#21253019
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42606) - you deserved it (3074)

On 09/06/2014 at 1:25pm - misc - by StillPissedOffAtIrony (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with a ring from Kay Jewelers. She saw the box, started giggling, whispered, "'Kay", and then started laughing so hard at her joke she had to excuse herself. FML

#21250887
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42531) - you deserved it (5214)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by very punny (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

#21251632
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41897) - you deserved it (3162)

On 09/04/2014 at 2:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I invited my deadbeat dad over for dinner, hoping we could resolve our issues and build a proper relationship. Just minutes after he arrived, I caught him stealing money from my purse. He actually said I owe him for raising me. He ditched my mom and me when I was 5. FML

#21255044
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41877) - you deserved it (3360)

On 09/09/2014 at 12:47pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I saw my teacher using her phone in the middle of class, so to joke around with her, seeing as we're on pretty good terms, I said: "Using your phone in class? For shame." She looks me in the eyes and says, "Would it be ok if I told you I'm arranging my father's funeral?" FML

#21256116
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41221) - you deserved it (14868)

On 09/11/2014 at 2:33am - misc - by lolwut - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend again told me how he wants to have an open relationship. Of course, this means he can do what he likes with anyone, but if I so much as kiss someone else, I'm a cheating slut. FML

#21252587
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41211) - you deserved it (6050)

On 09/05/2014 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by onlywantuanyway -

Today, some assface hacked my recently deceased friend's Facebook account. The person changed my friend's location to "Hell", then posted a status saying how hot the weather was, and replied "I wish :'(" to someone who'd said my friend was in a better place now. FML

#21257037
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40993) - you deserved it (2685)

On 09/12/2014 at 5:11pm - misc - by he's not the one going to hell (man) - Australia

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40649) - you deserved it (7756)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)



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