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Today, I went to my "not so technologically advanced" grandma's house to help her out with her computer. It appears she has very interesting conversations with the man who lives in the apartment above her. FML

#15061511
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27951) - you deserved it (3368)

On 02/21/2011 at 2:46am - intimacy - by Josie (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got caught trying to steal my own cat back from my neighbor. FML

#17423512
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29239) - you deserved it (3368)

On 08/09/2011 at 11:00pm - animals - by Nekro_Kat - United States (California)

Today, I smiled at a new kid and started a conversation with him, just to be nice. He later sent me 24 messages describing how strong his love for me is. I'm scared to go to school tomorrow. FML

#20200101
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30818) - you deserved it (3368)

On 12/11/2012 at 3:39am - love - by you're just creepy. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, my boyfriend became a magician. His best trick? The disappearing act. FML

#21292946
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30471) - you deserved it (3369)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:11pm - love - by highheelcyanide (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after a nap, I went to scratch my eye and felt what I presumed to be a clump of mascara on my eyelash. I didn't wear mascara today. It was a tick. FML

#2213407
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54122) - you deserved it (3367)

On 05/23/2009 at 3:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I fell down a set of stairs while going into my basement. With a horrible pain in my left leg, I called out to my boyfriend to help me. Apparently a commercial about grass was more important. FML

#6215205
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26382) - you deserved it (3367)

On 11/08/2009 at 5:38pm - health - by Elizabeh (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my boyfriend refused to have his hair treated against lice, because "men don't have lice". FML

#14130110
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26720) - you deserved it (3367)

On 12/08/2010 at 9:56am - health - by scratchy (woman) - Israel (HaDarom)

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to a snake. Not because of the size or shape, but because a snake is not something she imagines herself ever touching. FML

#19281835
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30405) - you deserved it (3367)

On 03/15/2012 at 7:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, whilst laying in bed with my girlfriend, she received a flirty message from her ex on her phone asking if she wanted to go to the cinema. She replied, knowing I could see the screen. The messages were signed with a love heart and about 15 kisses. She claims they are still just friends. FML

#21362430
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31652) - you deserved it (3367)

On 02/24/2015 at 6:50am - love - by anonymous - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I was playing Monopoly with my extended family. When my wife came home, she kicked me out of the game and took all my money and property. When I said she couldn't do that, she said "Sure I can. It's called divorce." Everyone laughed. Now I'm bored as hell, watching everyone else play. FML

#21395300
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27821) - you deserved it (3367)

On 04/17/2015 at 4:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I went for a jog. While passing by my neighbor's house, their six year old son started throwing peanuts at me screaming, "I hope this kills you!" because I'm allergic to peanuts. FML

#4820623
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53616) - you deserved it (3366)

On 08/25/2009 at 8:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I cleaned up my dog's crap after my wife asked me. 5 minutes later she yelled at me for being lazy as she slammed the door leaving for work. My dog shit in the exact same spot apparently to make me look stupid. FML

#14952962
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34908) - you deserved it (3366)

On 02/12/2011 at 9:17pm - animals - by Username - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my husband told me that he never washes his hands after using the bathroom because he thinks it's only for "paranoid people". FML

#17140315
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28479) - you deserved it (3366)

On 07/16/2011 at 8:17pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel (Tel Aviv)



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