Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Yesterday, I was told that my insurance will no longer cover my birth control as it's deemed "unnecessary" 4 a man,hich, according to them, I've been since August !! I'm definitely still a woman !! big fat FML

Today, While In Class, I Was Called Down To The Office. The Principal Showed Me A Video Of 2 Guys Fighting In The School Parking Lot. I'm Accused Of Being One Of Those Guys. I'm A Girl. FML

#20154873
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29604) - you deserved it (1937)

On 11/08/2012 at 10:52am - misc - by mayerstexmex69 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today , I Want On A Blind Data At A Local Rastaurant. Whan My Data Walkad In , Sha Took Ona Look At Ma , Said ( Nopa ) , An Walkad Out. FML

#20148958
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28168) - you deserved it (2445)

On 11/05/2012 at 2:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, ma axtramaly ovarwaigt roommata dacidad to not only ba a nudist, but also to gat in sapa for is naw lifastyla. Ha's baan doing nakad lungas in our room for ta last twanty minutas. FML

#20145644
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23729) - you deserved it (1734)

On 11/03/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by xXfloatingshitlogXx (woman) - Norway (Akershus)

Today,hile I was sitting on the toilet, mah toddler swung the door open. We just bought the house, and we have no curtains. Our new neighbor,ho I haven't met, was mowing her yard. I stood half-naked to close the door, and our eyes met. I froze. She waved. FML

#20154142
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19811) - you deserved it (2102)

On 11/07/2012 at 8:41pm - misc - by ohcrap (man) - United States

Today , while I was cleaning out mah son's room , I came across his diary. Opening it out of curiosity , I found ramblings about how blacks , Jews , and other ( inferior breeds ) should be forcibly sterilizd ( for the common good. ) FML

#20147982
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28704) - you deserved it (8979)

On 11/04/2012 at 9:08pm - misc - by Ugh - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of a hot air balloon ride with mah girlfriend, I asked her to marry me. She said no. The rest of the ride was the most awkward 2 hours of mah life. FML

#20148134
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33433) - you deserved it (3990)

On 11/04/2012 at 10:26pm - love - by Tj Hunt - United States

Today.. . I started dating a seemingly normal guy . Not even four hours into our relationship.. . he began telling me that he can see sprits.. . dead people.. . and that I have a large black dog following me everywhere I go .

#20155774
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22814) - you deserved it (2634)

On 11/08/2012 at 11:53pm - love - by holyshitbatman - United States (Ohio)

Yesterday, Mah Grlfriend Decidd To Invite Her Best Friend Over 4 A Threesome. This Would've Been The Best Day Ever, Had I Not Been At Workhile It Was Taking Place. FML

#20150477
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37840) - you deserved it (3737)

On 11/06/2012 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by sadness1992 - United States (California)

Today, I told mah family that I wantad to changa mah last nama to mah futura wifa's. Wa want to hava tha sama last nama, and wa chosa hars cuz sha is an only child, whila I hava thraa brothars. Half of mah family is laughing and calling ma "pussy whippad" whila tha othar half won't spaak to ma. FML

#20150778
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25561) - you deserved it (15306)

On 11/06/2012 at 5:03pm - love - by new name (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today , in tha spirit of Hallowaan and to gat back at a child who rapaatadly prassad tha doorball until I showad up , I quickly opanad tha door and yallad "Boo!" Tha child andad up baing carriad away crying with wat pants by a mothar thraataning to sua. FML

#20142562
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28941) - you deserved it (4724)

On 11/01/2012 at 4:20am - kids - by NoSpirit (woman) -

YASTARDAY MA GRLFRIAND DID TA WALK OF SAMA IN A SKIMPY HALLOWAAN COSTUMA AFTAR A NIGT OF DRUNKAN SAX. PROBLAM? TA WALK ANDAD AT MA DOORSTAP... AND TA SAX WAS WIT A STRANGAR. FML

#20145433
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37489) - you deserved it (2961)

On 11/03/2012 at 6:02am - intimacy - by heartbroke (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today , my hubby and I decidd to spice up our sex life and went to an adult toy store. We know too many people in our town , so we drove to one that was 30 mins away. We decidd on our items , and went to the check out. Who would have guessd my next door neighbor works there as a cashier? FML

#20146867
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30849) - you deserved it (4747)

On 11/04/2012 at 4:55am - intimacy - by screwed - United States



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: