Today, I introduced my mother to my new girlfriend. My mom made a very nasty comment about her in Spanish, not realizing that my girlfriend teaches Spanish at the local school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25382) - you deserved it (1676)
On 03/31/2012 at 11:01pm - love - by spanishsucks - United States (New Jersey)
Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like a woman's orgasm. After laughing, I realised that I'm probably too immature to be washing my own clothes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7316) - you deserved it (19416)
On 04/24/2012 at 10:03am - intimacy - by mmmtortilla (woman) - Spain (Pais Vasco)
Today, I somehow managed to hit my head on a first aid kit. I now have a cut on my forehead and my boyfriend just keeps laughing from the irony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14848) - you deserved it (3104)
On 04/18/2012 at 4:18pm - health - by 352 - United States
Today, I was taking a really big test in a class that I was failing. It was worth at least 7 grades so I studied my butt off. During the test, a girl with huge breasts sat down next to me and I couldn't stop staring. My test got confiscated because they thought I was cheating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7825) - you deserved it (43730)
On 04/05/2012 at 11:02pm - work - by tatatest (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I received a text from the guy I'm into, thanking me for helping him drunkenly stumble back to his apartment last night. He ended it with, "How long did you stay?" Apparently, he doesn't remember confessing his secret love for me, or the fantastic kiss that followed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22159) - you deserved it (2566)
On 04/26/2012 at 10:43am - love - by Aus (woman) - United States
Today, while landscaping my backyard, I was pulling a big weed out of the ground. After the last tug, the soil came free, but ended up with me punching myself full force in the nuts. I think my future children are already filing for parental abuse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16502) - you deserved it (3369)
On 04/21/2012 at 11:27pm - health - by JurassicHole (man) - United States
Today, my parents invited my Muslim boyfriend over for dinner for the first time. My mother made sure that everything including the salad had pork in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26284) - you deserved it (5059)
On 04/14/2012 at 7:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)
Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7430) - you deserved it (27814)
On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a serious conversation about our future. Somehow it turned into a 10-minute discussion about what time of day we usually take a crap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15265) - you deserved it (4594)
On 04/10/2012 at 12:41am - love - by kellie1115 - United States (West Virginia)
Today, a therapist told me that I was too depressed to attend his depression group meetings. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22452) - you deserved it (1782)
On 04/24/2012 at 7:22am - health - by Sad Sally (woman) - United States
Today, it's my 30th birthday. I was having a great night until I overheard my mother say, "I can't believe that thing made it to 30." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22073) - you deserved it (1591)
On 04/08/2012 at 9:58am - misc - by psychoticbiatch - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my husband told me to stop faking being sick, because, "morning sickness doesn't happen after noon." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22860) - you deserved it (2361)
On 04/13/2012 at 10:15am - love - by prego - United States (Michigan)
Today, I had to explain to my neighbor that black people aren't all lactose intolerant. His eyes still bulge out every time I eat cheese. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19760) - you deserved it (1497)
On 04/19/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by MI3 (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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