Today, after years of waiting, I finally got to meet the band whose music got me through one of the hardest times I have ever experienced. When I turned down the lead singer for sex, they told me to leave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24227) - you deserved it (8742)
On 04/15/2012 at 3:03am - intimacy - by bummed - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I entered a hotdog eating contest. I made it up to two, threw up on the rest of them, and fell over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5449) - you deserved it (16854)
On 04/27/2012 at 12:29am - health - by Weak Disposition (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I realized that both my husband and son refer to me as "the bitch." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13728) - you deserved it (17606)
On 04/22/2012 at 11:34am - misc - by stoggie96 - United States (Ohio)
Today, I found out that I've been calling my boyfriend's dad by the wrong name for the past two years. No one had told me sooner because they liked laughing at me for it when I wasn't around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16642) - you deserved it (2785)
On 04/26/2012 at 3:11am - misc - by somefamily (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I had to get stitches on my foot and was then forced to wear a plastic bag on my foot while showering. The plastic bag made me slip in the shower and had to go back and get stitches in my forehead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (94) - you deserved it (1726)
On 04/15/2012 at 7:39pm - health - by Shone - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, while at work, I found a dead dog in a freezer. Turns out it's been in there for over 3 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19673) - you deserved it (1295)
On 04/03/2012 at 11:27pm - animals - by Scarred (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my girlfriend of four years friend-zoned me while I was proposing to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34641) - you deserved it (1960)
On 04/11/2012 at 2:27pm - love - by crjsej - United States (Texas)
Today, my boss fired me because he wants to start dating my mother and apparently doesn't want it to be "awkward." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20137) - you deserved it (964)
On 04/14/2012 at 1:41am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I took a pregnancy test. I waited the longest two minutes of my life just to realize I missed the stick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6690) - you deserved it (16551)
On 04/05/2012 at 3:01pm - misc - by darkestbarbie - United States (Georgia)
Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15161) - you deserved it (14383)
Today, I woke up to shuffling noises coming from downstairs. Suspecting the worst, I jumped out of bed, and whispered over my shoulder for my girlfriend to stay quiet. Only after going downstairs and taking a swing in the dark with my bat did I figure out it was just my girlfriend foraging for snacks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7665) - you deserved it (17539)
On 04/01/2012 at 5:36pm - misc - by Zack - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I woke up for the third time in a row from a wet dream about my ex-girlfriend. I'm currently on my honeymoon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24353) - you deserved it (7690)
On 04/04/2012 at 6:53am - intimacy - by gordogs 25 - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, my wife woke me up by giving my erect penis a Chinese burn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19974) - you deserved it (2120)
On 04/28/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by poo4brains - New Zealand (Canterbury)
Monday 20 May 2013
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