Hard times
Today, I'm so strapped for cash that I smuggled toilet paper out of my mother's house. FML
Today, I'm so strapped for cash that I smuggled toilet paper out of my mother's house. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, due to "severe cuts to the budget" at work, I had to stir my coffee with a paperclip. FML
Today, my brother put pepper spray on my toilet paper. FML
Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML
Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML
Today, I woke up with the worst vaginal itching and swelling. I then find out it was brought on by my boyfriend's cheap brand of toilet paper. FML
Today, my mother gave me a bottle of stool softeners as a gift at my baby shower. FML
Today, I wanted to spend the day cleaning my room. My mom thinks that I was lying just to stay home, so she yelled at me to go to her shop. At the shop, she yelled at me for not being any help. When we got home she yelled at me for having a messy room. FML
Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML
Today, it's been two weeks since my parents went crazy with their attempts to save on the water bill. Every time I want to take a shower, I have to ask them first. Let's just say I've had to resort to taking sponge baths in public bathrooms to keep my B.O. under control. FML
Today, I found out that my neighbor's son is supposed to be giving me gas money for driving him to school each morning. He's using it to buy drugs instead. FML
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Top comments
bornaunicorn 12
Moms will always "spare a square".
cmayer 20
Sometimes you get pets before you fall on hard times.
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Comments (83)
gracehi 31
That's even worse than that time I filled my cats'litter box with dirty because I was so broke. Don't worry though, OP. One way or another, things will get better.
Infamous_Tora 12
Cats, litter box, dirt.
GuessWhatKids 13
Why would you have a cat if you were that broke?
cmayer 20
Sometimes you get pets before you fall on hard times.
iAlissa 34
I agree with 15... Don't keep a pet if you're not able to afford it. I'm not saying your a bad pet owner, but it's not responsible
soccerstar1996 18
Or you could borrow tp from the woman who raised you?
rg350dx 29
And dirt isn't going to kill the cat if it pisses or ***** in it. How do you think a cat would goto the bathroom in the wild? Dirt is a perfectly acceptable substitute for litter. It just won't absorb any smells.
picturescrazy 24
My cat prefers pooing outside in the dirt even though she has access to a litter box filled with cat litter. Using dirt instead of deodorized clay does not make her an irresponsible pet owner.
iAlissa 34
I guess you have a valid point! My apologies
gracehi 31
"cats'" because I own more than one and the litter boxes are theirs. Although I did make a few other typos. Times were hard, and I didn't foresee my financially difficulties when I got the pets. I had an unemployed husband who spent all my money on alcohol and drugs. I did the best I could with what little I was left, but feeding myself took priority over using cat litter. My cats never went hungry either, although I didn't take them to the vet as often as I should have. At one point I did try to find new homes for them, but it's nearly impossible to give cats away where I live due to an overpopulation of stray cats and the shelters always being full. I didn't want to abandon them or give them to a "kill" shelter, so I kept them all and just worked with what I could get. He's my ex husband now, and so now I'm never short on anything I or my cats need, including vet visits and litter.
gracehi 31
*financial
\ 28
Couldn't you have asked for it?? Are you trying to live on edge or something? Because if so, you're doing it wrong... Terribly wrong...
ileenefudge 29
If your talking financial wise, most parents I know don't particularly like to help their kids past 18 or even 16 sometimes. If your talking about the toilet paper itself, then the answer could go both ways, and OPs mom could say yes but wonder why or say no and tell OP to get a better job and work for everything. I unfortunately know of many parents who think that after 18 they really don't have to help their kids in any way because they are known as an adult in the eyes of the law/state and feel their kids can do everything on their own. It's sad but it's true It does happen.
ileenefudge 29
I also realize it never states OPs age but I assumed by the way it's worded that OP doesn't live with her mom and is on their own already so I assumed they Are an adult but I could be wrong
MuseFan1991 14
my mum and dad are still willing to help me even though im 22...if i needed loo roll i'd just need to ask instead of nicking some.
bornaunicorn 12
Moms will always "spare a square".
lonewolf621 17
We all have these moments, its how you deal with them that counts.
Damian95 16
On yeah? Well sometimes I don't do my homework, on purpose.
rg350dx 29
Psh. I goto neopets.com WITHOUT asking for my parents permission before going online.
iAlissa 34
#18, I dig those bad boys. Marry me.
nbandofbrothers 10
Why don't you move back in with your parents to save up some money or ask for some help.
cyanidesandwich 21
Because some people don't like selling their souls and enjoy having a social life. I personally wouldn't want to be known as the broke guy living in his mom's basement.
MlleMC_fml 19
Not everyone has that possibility, too. I'm pretty broke, but I couldn't live with my parents since my university is too far...
cyanidesandwich 21
To follow up, if you're too broke to afford toilet paper, don't worry the leaves are beginning to grow back on the tree, maybe take your pick on which to use as a replacement?
Pleonasm 35
Did you make a clean getaway or were you caught brown-handed?
Jakeymd 9
You missed a pun, 'Clean break'
iAlissa 34
#53- the pun wasnt missing anything
Hobbit79 10
Hah ! :D
iAlissa 34
I'm sure your mother would be willing to help you out! Just explain your situation. Mothers are pretty empathetic. :)
BadApple88 29
Ask your mom to loan you some money
edgarallanwoe 8
What will mother do now?