Poopoo peepee, Gross and Roommate: The smell test

The smell test

By sosadstudent - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Netherlands

Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 097

You deserved it 4 449

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Glade

By stinkystinky - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, after cleaning the whole house, I still couldn't get rid of the foul smell. Later, my roommate revealed his new place to "stash and dry" his socks: The ventilation ducts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 931

You deserved it 964

Night time entertainment

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I woke up next to my roommate staring in horror. She said I was singing and farting in my sleep. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 276

You deserved it 423

Close encounters

By Pinkie - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 281

You deserved it 2 715

Stranger danger

By shit - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself, "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard, "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud, or that I wasn't alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 719

You deserved it 31 733

Compacted

By RatFailure - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I looked into my sink's garbage disposal for the first time since I moved in two months ago. Apparently, the putrid smell was not the food I've been throwing down it, but instead, a now what appears to be mutilated litter of rats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 937

You deserved it 3 847

How could you?

By Ashlee - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while on a date with my boyfriend, he broke up with me. The reason why? Because I took a dump in his bathroom and "that's inappropriate for girls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 229

You deserved it 7 910

Surprising

By Anonymous - 28/11/2019 20:00

Today, my younger sister had some friends over at ours. I was in the shower but was horrified to realize my clothes and towel were gone. Figuring that she took them, I tried to make it to my room without being seen, but one of her friends came up to use the bathroom. She saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 104

You deserved it 311

Piss poor prank

By peedonme - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - New Zealand

Today, I was in the toilet. Some idiots thought it was funny to throw a water balloon into the cubicle. The balloon didn't pop, but fell in the toilet, sending my own urine onto my shorts. I had 4 hours left of school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 260

You deserved it 2 941

Tough shit

By c.m.g. - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff

Today, I was taking a dump in a porta-potty at a fair. I had the runs really bad. All I have to say is that it's tough to take a shit that seems never-ending while other people outside are bitching at you and hammering on the flimsy door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 572

You deserved it 3 914

Dude, what the…?

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I woke up to my apartment filled with smoke, fire alarms blaring. My roommate set my kitchen on fire while making hot dogs. This is the fourth time this has happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 031

You deserved it 4 741

Death_From_Above 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:45

that's a bit disturbing

chickunkey 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:49

You should expand your talents for all to see. Get your own show.

Comments

Death_From_Above 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:45

that's a bit disturbing

mars28 4

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:46

a bit?

360XBOXFTW 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:50

sarcasm FTW

eddieyes 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 10:31

shut up , if I dont get the sarcasm then it's not one

KittehGirl 3

Thursday 21 April 2011 10:33

very disturbing...

overthelimit 3

Thursday 21 April 2011 17:54

you know your roommates too well.. time for new ones :D

esu 5

Thursday 21 April 2011 23:48

that's ******..

ptxace 0

Friday 22 April 2011 10:42

Nast.

alex1502 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 5:57

I dont think that's a good thing...

cda2090 6

Sunday 24 April 2011 6:29

supa fun orgy time

chickunkey 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:49

You should expand your talents for all to see. Get your own show.

MrsLender_fml 3

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:12

She is a poop dweller!

iSitt 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:36

get a job at the colon clinic

iSitt 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:35

get a job at the colon clinic

mmmskittles 3

Thursday 21 April 2011 13:46

Scotland yard can use someone with such abilities.

racer337 2

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:50

Maybe you should get out more?

FriskyTaco 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:50

Buy some febreze or a scented candle...you obviously have a keen sense of smell..it's a gift

misssarahfina 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 13:14

Infamous_Hawk 6

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:53

The fat one? Even though they say it isn't them, it is.

briidontgive_ 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:14

Haha, that's what I was thinking

anabuddy123 10

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:57

weird...

Nimmrodel 11

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:11

It's all down to diet.

CheckMyProfile 17

Thursday 21 April 2011 15:44

Agreed!

louiseyanna 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 8:59

worst fml I have ever read.

Andrewlostnow 3

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:01

Sad..

ceddyz17 10

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:04

your mom is*

whosdatchick 0

Tuesday 19 July 2011 10:21

what's sad is your pic

ceddyz17 10

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:02

and I can tell how far away by how strong the tuna smell is

denvan 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 9:05

Wow your smell sense is like a hounds. Are you mixed or pure breed?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, after finally moving into a better neighborhood, my family and I were greeted by the elderly couple who live window to window to us. How? By hearing them have sex loudly and then praying for forgiveness even louder. Welcome to the neighborhood! FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 018

You deserved it 3 408

Today, I went looking for a childhood doll - I remembered that my mum kept her in her bedside cabinet. I could see the doll at the back, but there was stuff in the way, so I reached in and took some of it out, only to find I was holding one of my mum's toys… a big black rubber cock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 225

You deserved it 6 962

The Top

Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 669

You deserved it 35 868

Today, I was following my girlfriend up the stairs, I was pretty sure I was going to get lucky. As I was almost up the set of stairs, she lifted her skirt and revealed to me that she wasn't wearing any panties. I fell backwards down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 999

You deserved it 21 051

Today, while I was working at McDonald’s, a customer ordered the Shamrock Shake. I told him that due to supply chain issues, it was sold out. He threw a tantrum, then blamed all of us for, “Putting Sleepy Joe in office.” He stormed out, yelling, “Let’s go Brandon.” I don’t get paid enough for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 071

You deserved it 226

Today, my dear wife, an expert seamstress, took apart one shoulder of my favourite vest, looping the whole shirt through itself like a figure of eight, then stitched it back up. It took me over a full minute to realise why I suddenly couldn’t fold it flat, and she recorded me failing at it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 653

You deserved it 127

Today, while waiting for a doctors appointment, my husband started playing angry birds. Continually losing the game ended up raising his blood pressure to the point where he now has to have his medication changed. The new medication is $100 copay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 732

You deserved it 3 270

Today, my newly ex-boyfriend, who is also my co-worker, threw me under the bus about our relationship, except he claimed it was a one-sided relationship. I offered to show the consensual texts between us, but he insisted it’s “Photoshopped.” I was fired anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 080

You deserved it 164

Same thing different taste

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