Today, my friend asked to borrow my new laptop to email his college professor. When he returned it, it had a virus on it, and I had to fish out two pubic hairs that were sticking out between the keys. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was interviewing a cute guy for my journalism class, and he asked to borrow my laptop to check his email quickly. After the interview, I realized that the last thing I had searched for on my browser's Google box was "ingrown pubic hairs," and it was still up there. FML
Today, I managed to infect a clean computer with a virus while looking up info on how to rid my other computer of the same virus. FML
Today, I got my laptop back after lending it to my friend. It wouldn't boot, and after investigating I found out it'd been stripped of its hard drive and all its memory. When I confronted my "friend", he accused me of lying and trying to ruin his reputation. FML
Today, I let my friend use my computer to download some music. Now, my computer has 6 viruses and 4 songs, all of which I hate. FML
Today, I got two viruses on my laptop. One was a fake anti-spyware program that cluttered the screen with pop-ups. The other opened the browser repeatedly, each time to a generic porn site. This all conveniently happened at work, on a projector and during a meeting. FML
Today, my dad was sat on my laptop in the living room trying to learn how to do some rewiring around the house when he, and I quote, ”clicked on the thing.” My laptop is now riddled with so many viruses it’s basically a house brick. FML
Today, the new office IT guy figured the best way to get the virus off my computer was to wipe my entire hard drive. He was kind enough to back my data up and restore everything from the backups. Including the virus. FML
Today, my roomate took the toilet paper out of my bathroom. I went into his room to look for it, only to find a large wad of it balled up near his laptop and mouse. FML
Today, my mom borrowed my computer without my permission and downloaded a virus. I came home to a blue screen of death. She refuses to admit fault and pay for a new computer. FML
Today, my coworker asked to borrow my nail clippers so he could take care of a hangnail. He went to the bathroom, which I thought was polite, but when he got back to his desk and returned my clippers, there were little curly hairs stuck inside. He's bald. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
TorisaurusRexxx 10
I would tell you to install parental controls and site blocks, but that can't even keep 11-year-olds off of those sites.
Jonny_Blaze0017 26
At least their were no sticky keys ;)
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (107)
TorisaurusRexxx 10
I would tell you to install parental controls and site blocks, but that can't even keep 11-year-olds off of those sites.
lilhellian 26
It really depends on the program and the tech snarts of the person.. I have personally seen some lil kids getting past good securiry..
green2go 14
Tec snarts. Some one doesn't have auto correct
lilhellian 26
Don't throw stones in a glass house.. It's tech..
Sir_ND_Pity 35
42 - I prefer to follow the philosophy of not throwing stones at people regardless of housing situation :)
Wimoweh 10
Not to be that guy, but don't throw stones in a glass house...he said house, not people.
fdupagain 11
Don't throw stones while in a glass house. Throwing stones. At people. They throw them back. Shatter glass house. Its an old saying, I can't believe it has to be explained. For the ignorant, it means to not insult someone when you are guilty as well. Any questions?
MDTeddy 13
It is only a virus. Just run a an anti virus program in safe mode and take out the virus. Free ones don't work well so don't bother. Also, never let anyone borrow your laptop unless you trust them. Also, there are safe **** websites. I guess Op's friend doesn't know one.
WillTay 8
How do you know the hairs were pubic?
dunebro 15
Do you mean sites about how to shave your balls?
MsSoulReaper 27
Email his professor what? A picture of his hairy penis? >.< that's just nasty
MsSoulReaper 27
For clarification, I know what OP's friend actually used the laptop for. Still very nasty and inappropriate if you ask me.
allskollfukurmom 2
Cleveland voice
Jonny_Blaze0017 26
At least their were no sticky keys ;)
laden_swallow09 34
*there
jojimugo 20
Which is worse , stickiness or public hair?
hellobobismyname 24
36, sticky public pubic hairs are the worst.
SammyS2012 21
So... sticky keys werent enabled?
asherm 15
Yeah, sanitize that!!
Serisent 26
Well, balls to that then.
alwayswinning123 7
Well looks like someone was watching ****
friedchickenpie 14
My god, I think we've found Sherlock Holmes!
Cupcake040 17
Thanks tips!!!!! Never woulda figured that one out I'm sure we would all be stumped without your help!!!
rattusrattus 18
Nah, he was emailing his college professor. He just didn't say what *kind* of email he was sending...
potatosareawesom 7
he could of just downloaded a virus doing something else and it could of been a hair from somewhere else or from op
sacmaster 11
55- *have Sorry. The of/have confusion bugs the shit out of me.
Rababco 29
@16 If #6 is Sherlock Holmes then who's John Watson?
Dean3000 6
never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever lend your laptop to anyone, even a friend. Treat it like your car!
insertnameherr 11
Or you could just lend your stuff to more respectful and responsible people.
xr0517 10
sometime it's just hard to see what someone is like
heinous966 15
Maybe his "professor" was the star of a student-teacher type porno? Either way, he should have at least cleaned up his pubes.
Darkasnight1717 8
Yeah but at least now he knows not to let that friend borrow his laptop ever again
zandalee 19
I think he gave the computer a STD.
fdupagain 11
He should sell the friend the computer, for a lot of money, and buy a new [untainted] computer.
Mirailecious 23
This is why we can't do nice things. :(
hashshim 23
*have. This is why we can't HAVE nice things. That comment was so close to perfect.
Zen_Mei 17
Eww!! Sanitize your laptop ASAP
challan 19
Well, that's the best class ever.