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Today, I stepped out of my car and slipped on a fresh coating of ice on the ground. I tried to catch myself by grabbing the car on my way down, but unfortunately, I was trying to grab with the hand that was holding my car keys. I key-scratched my own car. FML
Okay, let me explain it. The OP started to slip on ice, and tried to prevent herself from falling by grabbing the car. Unfortunately, the hand that was grabbing the car had the car keys in that. This means that the OP, when making grabbing motions, effectively scratched her car with the keys, causing a "keyed car" effect.
OP fell and damaged her paint job.
And other hemispheres have winter at different times than others, so it's possible for the OP to be somewhere snowy.
This person lives in Iowa, NOT the southern hemisphere. Look at the bottom of the story, near where her name is. There is no ice on the ground in Iowa in May. I live in Iowa, and there was no ice at all during May. Nor was there ice anywhere else in Iowa. So either this is fake, or the OP was talking about a story that happened months ago, in which case it's not "Today."
Speak your mind, but please try and be respectful.
Friday 12 December 2014