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Today, I am taking a 16 hour flight. Five minutes in, the lady on one side has clipped her toenails onto me and the guy on the other side has the most horrific gas I have ever smelled. To help this problem he bought a cheese plate from the stewardess. 15 hours and 55 minutes to go. FML
Fart in your hand and sniff it. If that doesn't scare them away, start talking about how you need to take a monster shit but the bathrooms are occupied. Then suggest taking a shit in the vomit bag and make it look like you're about to actually do it.
Unless the lady has hundreds of toes, that part of the nightmare should end pretty soon. On the other hand, it should take some hours for the cheese to generate sone farts that smell like the innermost circle of Hell.
That's going to be some classic gas.
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