By nofrickenway - 25/04/2012 00:08 - United States - Newport News

Today, I found out that my unemployed and very needy mother-in-law will be moving in with us soon. And during my conversation on the phone with her, she expects us to buy a house and my wife and I can "live with her." My wife agrees with all of this. FML
I agree, your life sucks 30 954
You deserved it 2 736

Same thing different taste

Top comments

You might want to go ahead and stop your mother-in-law now before you have two wives.

Comments

Well. I can see what your wife is thinking. She's paying back her parent for taking care of her by giving her shelter, food, clothing, etc. even if they didn't provide all the stuff you needed. You still grew up fineeee. So you should probably be giving back to your elders.

She is paying back? Since when does the offspring have to pay off the parent? It's the parents liability to care for them, they don't need to be repaid. Unless they decide to repay the parents, but judging from your comment, it seems manditory.

3- there's a difference between giving back and abuse.

^ Hmm, I find myself agreeing with both of you for different reasons. One, presuming the parent tried to raise the child with love and respect, I'd like to believe the child would want to return the favour when the roles are reversed and the parent needs the TLC. But pay back, as in, "You owe me, I provided for you", seems something less than love and more like using guilt to barter and leverage something you want. :p I think morally, if Op can help the mom-in-law if she actually needs a place to live, it'd be a decent thing to do, but they shouldn't feel obliged to. I know I'd help out my folks in a heartbeat if they ever needed it, but they'd never want to impose on me by asking.

8-It's a moral obligation to repay back. To rephrase what I said before. It's not necessary to pay back your parent; however, you would be stuck to face guilt. If it's the parent liability to take care of the child. The child has a liability(mortally) back toward their parent.

Not everyone has the money to buy a house, and especially not on the spot like that.

However, #3, it is the fault of the parent that they are in the situation of needing help and should "man up" and take care of herself.

thiscrazything 1

I agree with you, pelio, but it should never be demanded. Most children, if raised with love and kindness would want to care for their older parents, but there are some hateful parents whose children won't want to have anything to do with them.

I think a key point being missed here is he owes her nothing. If the wife wants to go and buy a house herself using her own money that she's making on the side (ahahahahahahaha goodluck) then by all means go ahead, but he shouldn't have to be obligated to support her mother and buy her a house. What he can do is offer for her to live with them, but that's not what's happening here, it sounds like hes getting the shaft.

This may end up being a bit racist but have you guys considered that Pelio may be a second or first generation Asian-American? I know that the ideas that he has are similar to that of some Asian cultures. Such as the idea that you should take care of your parents and elders when they reach an older age. I'm not saying this is bad but it would explain where the ideas that he has may have originated.

@jizzworld: I was just about to point that out. I'm half filipino and half mexican, but my asian side has always been taught to take care of your elders once you become stable yourself. Or even those of your spouse, such as in this case. It may just be a cultural thing. Its frowned upon to put your elders in a nursing home or anything like that.

Mommyof2_91 10

I understand her wanting to help her mother, but in no way is she obligated. Her mother brought her into the world, not the other way around. Although it would be sad and take a lack of morals to let her mother sleep on the streets, she's not responsible for her. Anyways fyl for being in the middle of this,

onlythetruth_fml 0

You're trying way too hard to sound smart.

MissCharlotte_fml 26

Yes, she should help her mother out, but that she wants them to buy a house and have them live "with her" is unacceptable. Who knows what OP's financial situation is, they might not want or be able to buy a house. I just hate how she had the nerve to tell THEM to buy a house, and then say they could live with HER.

amspawforth 4

If it bothers you so much, do something productive about it and sit down with your wife, explain that this has made you unhappy. If you approach a situation in a mature way you're more likely to reach a resolution OP.

Anyone else curious about why the 2nd double post has more thumbs up then the 1st?

RedPillSucks 31

The 2nd argument was much more persuasive than the first.

IDontKnow10101 14

maybe they like the number 10 better than 9.

YdoIhaveAchode 4

3- I hate it when people complain about the first comment.

katcot99 11

28-I hate when people complain about people complaining to the #1 comment.

nofearjenshere 12

My comment was supposed to go to the bacon one... Why is FML glitching so much lately. :(

French_Toast_fml 3

Seriously, Kayla's right. If all you have to say is some stupid, irrelevant one-liner, don't comment.

ha I love how people go crazy over what the first comment consists of. It doesn't really matter so why bother bitching about it?

It's because they're simply jealous, 102.

Well that sounds like a personal problem to me. But man up and say how you feel! Just talk to your wife to compromise the issue.

You give in to this and you are screwed. Just set some boundaries for Gods sake or she will make your life miserable. Say no

It's weird how the wife agrees to all this, they both could be planning something, you never know. Be careful man.

If its only temporary and she's just planning on stay there until she gets back on her feet, then I don't see a problem with that. But if she expects you to spoon feed her for the rest of her life, then she's messed in the head.

4everblackjack 10

I'm pretty sure the wife is agreeing because she wants a house, my mom would agree to anything if she can get a house out of it aha

116 - I think your mom just thumbed down your comment.

Wow what sort of sorcery has your mom got on your wife?

You might want to go ahead and stop your mother-in-law now before you have two wives.

Nightwing98 22

Or on your couch. :3 Green Acres reference.

sparklecherry 4

Farm living is the life for me!! Haha!!!

Tell her no way or divorce your wife...like wtf is wrong with them?

I think talking about it seems reasonable. Divorce because of small things like this without confronting them to work toward a solution is practically the reason why the divorce rate is so high in the United States.