Today, my 5-year-old son thought it'd be a good idea to pee into the heat vent in the hallway of our apartment building. The whole building now smells like urine. The landlord is a 6-foot ex-convict. He wants answers. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML
Today, I found out why my bathroom has been smelling so bad. My 10-year-old son has been peeing on the radiator, thinking it's fun to watch it steam and sizzle. FML
Today, my 10-year-old brother got the bright idea to urinate in my oven to cool it off. My whole house smells like burnt piss. FML
Today, my boss told me to find the bad smell coming from the apartment we were working on. I found the bathtub about 4 inches high full of piss, and spent the next hour bailing it out into a bucket because the drain wasn't connected yet. I have pee stains in all the wrong places. FML
Today, I ran into the living room when I heard the smoke alarm going off. Turns out, my friend thought it was a good idea to melt a plastic cup on my floor heater. He also thought the best way to put it out was to urinate on it. My house smells like burnt pee. FML
Today, I came home to find my husband and our 4-year-old son simultaneously peeing off the second-floor balcony. My husband was giggling like a little girl. FML
Today, my idiot son incinerated his shoes in the oven. They were wet and he wanted to "quick-dry" them, so now the whole house smells terrible. FML
Today, I discovered my 18 year old son has been peeing on the carpet when he is too lazy to get out of bed in the morning and blaming it on the cat. FML
Today, after explaining to my four-year-old why our new puppy was peeing on things to mark his territory, my son decided to follow suit and pee all over our house. FML
Today, after taking a shower, I realised that my landlord was peeking in the whole time through broken ventilator. Once he tried to get into my room, using his keys. I couldn't tell the landlord's wife, as I didn't have any proof so I left the house, even though my rent was long due. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
jgmarines 4
Sounds like urine a lot of trouble
Black_Knight80 13
Either run as fast as you can or just play the I don't know what you're talking about card.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (54)
Black_Knight80 13
Either run as fast as you can or just play the I don't know what you're talking about card.
unjustlychicken 10
posting this on the internet may not help their case
littlem91 29
I know this website is popular but what are the odds of her landlord or even another building resident seeing this? Although, you now have me wondering if anyone has been caught out by FML.
kalinka07 5
The son might give it away by saying something. Running is the best option.
incoherentrmblr 21
This is priceless. Even more priceless if he reads this.
MAD01502 20
Lie like you've never lied before!!!
classybender321 4
173 people are liars
RenoTheRhino 30
217 people are liars.
jgmarines 4
Sounds like urine a lot of trouble
bertyogurt 7
I'm surprised that this wasn't tremendously thumbed down. lol.
DarkSaul 20
It was probably because it was original. Not like "Op is in a crappy situation" that has been posted everywhere.
bertyogurt 7
I've seen it a few other times on other urine related posts, and everyone pretty much jumped in responding with "just stop", and "quit", which I thought was pretty funny. I'll be the one that gets thumbed down, however, so **** it.
bertyogurt 7
It you type "urine" into the FML search bar and search all of the urine related posts, almost every comment section will have this comment. Just thought you'd want to see how unoriginal it actually is.
nickdunbar 8
you will never win. its either the pun is not funny, or it is. FML community has its fits
iglesia 11
Well this escalated
trueblue1010 12
XD this cracked me up oh my gosh
Helpfulman 17
R Kelly?
anythingmustbe 18
Seems like urine a spot of bother. Try to explain it to him calmly so you won't piss him off.
akballerchicity 11
Why would he/she tell that her son did it? Just lie.
MidnaLink 33
Uhh… 'cause he's only 5 and they are more easily forgiven.
mintyowlgirl 20
The puns! They burn!!!
alyant 12
Know of any good hiding spots?
Queen_bee1234 21
Seems like you are in a pissy situation! Oh yeah, I have always wanted to do this. Let the thumbs down commence.
GraceyBlueEyes 13
Thumbed down purely for mentioning being thumbed down.
184886837272837 32
Thumbed down for saying someone was going to get thumbed down for saying they were going to get thumbed down.
hashshim 23
Thumbed down for confusing me with that last one.
mariab2898 13
There are so many urine jokes and they're not even that funny.
DotDootyDot 17
Your landlord can still be a reasonable person despite being an ex-convict. Explain what happened and that you will do what is necessary to make the smell of urine go away - it's your kid, after all, so it's your responsibility to fix the problem.
184886837272837 32
Yes about 80% of convicts are in on nonviolent charges, most of them just possession of drugs. So unless your land lord went to a gladiator academy of a prison odds are he's not that bad of a guy... he's just really tall
HarrisonHarrison 4
6 feet isn't REALLY tall
False_Stupidity 41
It is if you're a dwarf.
FandomOfRandom 5
Thank you. You are actually a mature human being who realizes that people can still be nice.
DubstepMasta 18
lol he sounds so unreasonable just from op saying "He wants answers."
Soundslikeothers 15
Sounds like Urine a lot of trouble. now excuse me while I take my down votes like man.
Soundslikeothers 15
Damit someone already said it I'm too lazy to read 8 comments
Soundslikeothers 15
This editing your comments system Sucks FML staff you should be able to delete your comments
bertyogurt 7
@25- Maybe you should take the users opinion with the intention of creating a flawless app, and not insult the user. Just an insane thought. I'm sure I'll be banned after this, but **** it.
thomcmoore 23
Did you just...
ksks1234 33
I wish you guys would let us thumb you up (or down).
skipper2009 18
The FML staff can't handle being shot down. They are "sensitive".
kilullu 16
HahahaHAHAHA! I loved your reply, didi!!
AUShano 15
Don't drop the soap big homie....
Wizardo 33
Don't be a snitch, he won't like that but channel your inner con artist and blame let's say an animal for example...
chinaski7628 32
What kind of example would lying about it set for OP's 5 year old son? It may be unpleasant, but it's probably a better idea for OP to teach his son about honesty and taking responsibilities for his actions.
Wizardo 33
Yo man when it comes to potentially dangerous situations screw it. But of course OP could discipline the kid afterwards without having to feel threatened and embarrassed by a giant ass, prison hardened dude.