Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
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Today, my daughter came up to me crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she told me that she had a fight with her imaginary boyfriend. She's 16. I raised this child. FML
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, my 14-year-old daughter told me she's pregnant and plans on dropping out of school to live a life on the road with her boyfriend. FML
Today, my daughter was acting strange. When she wasn’t muttering in some strange language, she was talking about invisible people coming to get me. Terrified, I called my boyfriend. Turns out he taught her that as a prank. He knows I’m afraid of anything supernatural. FML
Today, I found out that my daughter not only has a boyfriend, but that they're trying for a baby. She's barely 15. FML
Today, I had to call a parent and tell them that their special needs daughter is pregnant. FML
Today, my 15-year-old daughter told me that she's pregnant. To make matters worse, she doesn't know who the father is. She told me not to worry though, because she has it narrowed down to "like, only 3 guys." FML
Today, a sixth grader complained to me about her emotionally cheating ex and her current boyfriend. I haven't had a single partner yet. A 12 year-old has a VERY EXISTENT and better love life than I do. When I said this to her she said "Well, at least your parents love you." They didn't. I need therapy. And a life. FML
Today, I finally found out my suspicions about my 12 year-old daughter were correct, and I don’t know which one is worse: She's had a boyfriend and has denied it for the last 3 months, or the fact that my partner thought it was a good idea to let it go on for this long without telling me. FML
Today, I found out that my 8-year-old daughter somehow learned how babies are made. Sort of. I found this out when we had the open house at her school where she meets her new teachers. When one teacher asked where she was from, she replied, "My daddy's balls." FML
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Top comments
Smileycloud 14
Be proud she isn't having sex with a real one!
Airman1988 9
Well her imaginary boyfriend better man up and take care of that imaginary baby. God forbid he deny it then you would have to take her on imaginary Maury and get an imaginary DNA test...
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Comments (122)
Smileycloud 14
Be proud she isn't having sex with a real one!
Mr_Satan 11
It's sad that having a sexually inactive pre-teen is actually something for a parent to be proud of these days...
4ube_fml 6
I'm more worried about what sex ed thought her...
BradyT918 9
When in the past would a parent ever be proud of having a sexually active pre-teen
emburybrett 3
There are way to many dumb people having sex now a days without thinking... I know 4 yes 4 people I've known since middle school pregnant and I'm only 16.
Dracoboxer357 35
1- More like be Relieved, as some kids are losing their virginity that young. ;p And honestly, correcting a girl who Thinks she can be pregnant with an imaginary friend, is rather easier than dealing with a girl who got pregnant with a real one. A second helping of sex ed to table one, please. :P
dontyawishyaknew 12
Am I the only one that thinks maybe her boyfriend is real and OP just thinks he's imaginary? It would be worth looking into anyway.
ihaveasushicat 24
Actually, I'm just hoping that said boyfriend is imaginary and that it's good she is still young enough to be able to use her imagination. Most kids her age are so glued to other things, such as sex, that they forget to use their imagination and creativity. It's "not cool" to go outside and play pretend at that age now.
jatinbhanot 6
or it could be some weird paranormal activity shit..
l23VIVE 17
Really? At 12? Im 16 and cant get laid... Maybe I should try a 12 year old! Im joking of course but still
soak_25 21
come on?? at the age of 12??
OneLittleAdditio 9
well at least you only have the problem of her imagining this. it can be fixed. if she were pregnant with a real bf. well thats not as easy to deal with. :/
yoyoforpeace 14
I guess I'm the only one that would be more concerned if she's having sex with the imaginary boyfriend... Then come the therapy sessions...
plum_lovin 28
Lets just hope she doesn't replace the imaginary one for a real one..
Moonfae 4
yea seriously, that was my first thought . What if her imaginary boyfriend isn't so imaginary anymore.
Bluepies 24
I can't imagine why she would think that.
NickaPLZ 26
Probably her real friends. I learned 75% of what I know about sex before the 6th grade. And most of it turned out to be correct.
crjmc13 6
I think he was trying to be punny...
One_In_Three 24
Schizophrenia is one hell of a drug!
StarThrower 17
Buy her a good age-approriate book that explains things objectively and in a clearer way. Welcome question. And for God's sake, keep her away from trying to find the answers on the Internet!
watchclock 11
Don't just pick up a random book! Read any literature you're thinking of giving her first from cover to cover! Oftentimes, literature explaining sexual matters just confuse kids even more. Be sure that the kid won't get more confused after reading it.
MyNameIsViet 15
How about a pop-up book of human anatomy?
im_joking 11
Maybe she'll have an imaginary baby?...
apax 9
Queef?
Overatedlife_fml 5
she's having imaginary sex I'm guessing
tialeanne 19
Or just masturbating!
doodlecloud 26
She's obviously not JUST masturbating - you need something from BOTH genders to get imaginary pregnant! Guess not everyone managed to make it to 'the talk'?
yeti37 16
And like most guys, he was only wearing an imaginary condom
Airman1988 9
Well her imaginary boyfriend better man up and take care of that imaginary baby. God forbid he deny it then you would have to take her on imaginary Maury and get an imaginary DNA test...
Coolaaron88 9
Let's not forget that imaginary child support!
Airman1988 9
Indeed just wait until his imaginary parents find out!
Jakespeed207 4
Seems like she'll soon be taking his imaginary paychecks.
ElementaryEdGuy 18
I would watch the crap out of that episode of Maury.
SixInchScar 8
Bubble buddy anyone? How about bubble condoms for him
SamSwebb 24
Better that than a positive pregnanxy test haha your daughter sounds sweet!
anythingmustbe 18
Pregnancy*