Today, I received a response to my perfectly straightforward online dating profile: "How about changing a dirty diaper, mommy?" FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, I posted an ad online for house cleaning services. So far, all fifteen responses have been solicitations for sex. FML
Simp
Today, an old flame reached out with some truly filthy intent. After burning with righteous indignation, I ended up sending back some embarrassingly submissive pictures. What is wrong with me? FML
Tinder surprise
Today, I accidentally sent a screenshot of my Tinder conversation to my mom, instead of my friend. Yes, it was dirty. FML
Dirty room
Today, I sent a scantily clad pic to my boyfriend, to which he responded "Nice, but please clean your room". FML
Today, I signed up for a dating site and used a photo of my mother and me at a wedding. Everyone stops responding when they find out they're talking to me and not her. FML
Today, I thought it would be hot if I sent my boyfriend kinky message. He didn't reply so I sent a few more. 10 minutes later I got a reply saying, "Honey, this is his mom and you should be a little less desperate." FML
Why do people do this?
Today, a friend showed me my husband's online dating profile, which includes photos of him with our kids. FML
No kinkshaming, but come on…
Today, after going on a blind date with a man I'd met on Facebook, we went back to his apartment. All was going good, until he took off his pants, only to reveal that he was wearing a diaper. FML
Filth
Today, my boyfriend's response to me saying, "Most women like a bit of filth in the bedroom every now and again" was to start farting in bed. Not quite what I meant. FML
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
Top comments
Mauskau 35
And that is when you pretend you didn't see the message and never reply...
iAlissa 34
That's a panty dropper for sure.
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Comments (55)
rainbowlove272 5
Gotta love infantilism.
laden_swallow09 34
You can. I don't have to.
peithecelt 28
no, I can respect that we all have different things we are into, but I absolutely can not love that particular kink.
Mirorbo 26
There are so many implications behind that question, and I'm not sure which is worse.
1two3four5six 23
I think the only implication is that the person who sent the message is into infantilism
Mauskau 35
And that is when you pretend you didn't see the message and never reply...
HersheySquirts 17
Or reply to him and say your a tranny and not only can you be mommy, you can be daddy too.
Welshite 39
Well, he /is/ a dirty boy. He might also ask you to spank him when he's been naughty.
annoth 8
Block him OP
abhi95 31
And there you go: consequences of straightforwardness in a twisted world!
dragoongirl90 34
How is this a consequence of being straightforward? This is called the insane, sick **** not even reading the profile and ignoring her straightforwardness.
iAlissa 34
How the **** would any woman find that attractive?
Panchovilla64 6
hey ma I just shit myself wanna come and clean it? does this sound better?
iAlissa 34
That's a panty dropper for sure.
Lichinamo 33
Some people are into weird shit. Personally I wouldn't be happy with that message. ... I might be the one that SENT the message, but that's totally different. As I said, women are into some weird shit.
SammyS2012 21
I was thinking that he was speaking sardonically because her profile stated she was a single mom, and he was just being a douche. thats what i interpreted from it at least
daddysgirl8 21
Some women are Dominate figures and like to have baby boys. I am a baby girl with a Daddy dom. It all depends on what you're into. Some people like BDSM, some don't for example.
_kawaii_ 10
Mommy issues perhaps?
LinkandSaria 10
Some people... Keep looking for a date OP. Good luck
Wizardo 33
Looks like an Oedipus and diaper complex, this guy needs Huggies, but don't Pampers him or his muses you don't need to Mothercare about this random Johnson and Johnson's.
arandomusernameaa 20
You are trying too hard. first ones were fine. the last few however...
HKCgrimmjow 15
Yeah shoulda stopped after pampers. But was quite entertaining up to that point!
lemontreee 11
It's Oedipus