Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Lady Vulva
🌶️ Spicy
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML
henhouse
This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff
Brunswick East, Australia 🌶️ Spicy
Happy Valentine's Day
Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML
Anonymous
London, United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
True romantic
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. During the act, he looked deep in to my eyes before whispering, "Up the arse next time?" FML
ShouldveStayedAVirgin
Houston, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 7 years. He thrusted as fast as rabbits. I waited years for 10 seconds. FML
Anonymous
Bedford, Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
klsdhjla
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Lost in the sauce
Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Nuts
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was in a movie when my boyfriend sent out a mass text saying that he'd just lost his virginity. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Giggle loop
Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML
unsatisfied
France 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I lost my virginity. It took all of 30 seconds. FML
Top comments
IXChaosDragonXI 13
And that's why you make the bastard wait lol
raininginseattle 9
Ask him "why do all the guys yell that?"
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Comments (144)
Fuaaad1994 31
FIRST, BITCHES
IXChaosDragonXI 13
And that's why you make the bastard wait lol
vucui 21
So what you're saying is that she should've slept with someone else first, before her boyfriend so he wouldn't get the privilege? ...that make no sense at all.
TheCanucklehead 22
That's not what he said at all
CallMeMcFeelii 14
You must have some type of magical reading comprehension skills to get that idea from number one's comment. I sure as hell didn't think that's what they meant!
amayasoma 19
14 - How in the world did you come up with that?
Fuaaad1994 31
#14, you make no sense at all
luckyone365 7
It would have been funnier if this comment said "first".
Palirose 22
#45. If it did this comment would have been moderated or buried. Lol
notsofriendly 17
Super disappointed this didn't say "FIRST, BITCHES!".
fucMyLifeSoHard 18
2- If she made him wait, he probably still would have said it when they did do it.
glabberfasted 16
This comment isn't even the first. Notice it's #2. The first probably DID say first and got deleted.
vucui 21
Seriously, making him wait wouldn't have changed the outcome. And yes, I assumed (ass out of you and me, and all that jazz) that the #2 comment meant something different. Oh no. Crucify me.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Us here on fml don't crucify, we condemn.
websphere69 27
hopefully she condomed. him...
Axipiter 24
Heh heh. The devil wishes to be crucified...
vucui 21
Finally, someone gets the crucified joke.
GEBEH 14
Even if she would've made him wait another couple of years he could have still yelled out "FIRST, BITCHES!" #1 makes no sense, where that comment even if unlikely makes complete sense.
Sansa_fml 38
#48 that was exactly what I was thinking. the only time people would appreciate that.
hghrider123456 9
He's even worse than FML commenters who say that....
greeneyebeauty9 28
Is #1 gone for that reason? Ironic.
Fuaaad1994 31
I think that was meant to be mine, I wrote 'FIRST, BITCHES' in relation to this fml, but my phone thought otherwise
onlychildFTW 34
This would have been the only "FIRST" comment acceptable I think. It would have been very nice to see that.
mxij 13
Wait, did those really exist? I have only heard legends of those dark times.
pwnman 33
At least he didn't moo...
safaeita 32
haha that's op's sister haha
Ambient25 25
Considering OP knew her boyfriend for a while before she lost it (hopefully), how did she not see this "coming"?
jillytc 23
wow he's not a keeper
xDovahkiin 12
I agree with you.
beelee1988 13
So because he said something stupid (which most guys and girls do). He is all of a sudden not a "keeper"? For all we know he could be the sweetest boyfriend. Apparently that doesn't matter though.
MrsMelvin 5
hmmmmm twin you may be on to something
ThatNutellaTho 6
#107 I Agree!! maybe He's Just a Competitive Dork?
_GoodGuy 11
Technically, he CAME first.
junkman6 22
Nothin wrong with being a gold medalist! "It's a race and I always win!"
Grayness_ 26
I think he meant that he was her first.
hunts19ketchup 23
#67, you don't say?
olpally 33
Really? Cum on, he needs to grow up. Big whooptie ******* doo.
mif_fml 27
So creative using "cum" to really mean "come."
olpally 33
Back handed compliment... Not accepted.
jesustitts 20
She was being sarcastic. It's not a compliment.
fucMyLifeSoHard 18
52- What do you think a back handed compliment is?
TheOnlyMizLiv 22
52 tried to give clarification when really she needed clarification. Brilliant.
Rozay333 36
Lmao! No, but seriously that sucks
arandomusernameaa 20
Thanks for that inspiring and creative comment...
timss4 19
Thanks for that asshole comment Since when do comments have to be inspiring or creative?
raininginseattle 9
Ask him "why do all the guys yell that?"
tukies 28
And then you say it may have been my first, but it kinda sucked...