gerligrl97
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, along with my virginity, my boyfriend took my laptop, iPhone, TV, and most of the food in my fridge. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
december2009
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Gone
Today, I woke up to realize that the guy who took my virginity last night also took my flat screen TV. FML
ROLLY
United States
Today, my boyfriend stole a guy's cookie. As revenge, he stole my iPod. FML
Anonymous
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I woke up cold. The guy I had sex with last night stole my blanket. He also took everything out of my freezer, and all of my soap, shampoo, and conditioner. The number he left me was for a pizza place. FML
Shortround
Wheaton, United States
Today, I had three things stolen: my phone, my iPod, and my girlfriend. All by the same guy. FML
faded as shit
United States
Today, my parents took away my laptop, TV, Xbox, and car all because I broke up with my girlfriend. They said when I patch things up with her, I can have my stuff back. FML
Sad
United States
Today, my house got broken into. My brand new laptop was stolen, along with my flatscreen TV, digital camera, external hard drive and some clothes. Wanting to drown my sorrows in the Ben and Jerry's Phish Food ice cream in the freezer, I opened the door to find that it too had been stolen. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff
Baltimore, United States
Suspicious activity
Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML
Danielle
United States
Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML
Anonymous
Germany
Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, my boyfriend moved out and took all his things with him. He also took some things that didn't belong to him, namely my rent money. My landlord comes tomorrow. FML
Top comments
futtbuck101 1
you better get that food back
Calyx_fml 21
Yet you call him your "boyfriend".
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (352)
ryankon518 3
You got owned...
seanders 10
Your boyfriend must be good at chess. He thought many moves ahead. He knew that you would be clingy, giving yourself to him. He then considered that you'd prolly want to settle down, get married and get a home. Then you'd get bored, divorce him and take his laptop, tv, etc. He just thought "not if I do it first!" and took your shit instead. Like I said: He's a genius, and probably a good chess player!:)
seanders 10
Your boyfriend is a genius and probably a good chess player, he was several moves ahead of you. He considered that since you were his first, you'd be clingy with him. He knew this would progress to you wanting to settle, marry and probably buy a home. He knew you'd get bored though, and divorce him and thus taking his shit. He then thought "**** that, not if I strike first". He then proceeded in the preemptive strike. Thus: he's a genius!;)
seanders 10
Sorry for the double post...
xBangOut 4
Who were you dating really? Don't you want to know a man little better before you lose virginity to him? Or nowadays that doesn't mean anything at all? Too many douchebags are in this world, you were fool and there is no one to blame but yourself. Of course dude is an absolute asshole, but if you will stop being dumb, you will avoid situations like this.
BeastNerd 3
He raped you?
kathii01 20
well said 38
dj2013 6
stupid......
dj2013 6
stupid......
smurfsarwales 9
74,wtfda **** r u doin cus dats sum nasty shit. anyway ya don't look to single to me...
Epilepsy_fml 0
Smurfsarwales you have now been crowned the most annoying ass bitch on this site. Stop talking in text lingo. ohhh and Stop trying to be a hood rat.
smurfsarwales 9
at least I don't hav the fattest cat in da world AND give it beer. if u read my profile, it said dnt **** me. and don't give me bullshit about not being ****** to cus u took da time to comment...
seanders 10
87: Your are now officially the dumbest as well...
Sirin_fml 46
Can I buy a vowel?
Siji 0
"Well said" made me laugh xD
smurfsarwales 9
chill it's just fml. realax tho that might be hard for an ASSHOLE!!!
Sirin_fml 46
Chill your balls, son. Watching the pot call the kettle black was funny though. :-)
Epilepsy_fml 0
#91... I think it's time for a nap. You're a little cranky today. So... FALL BACK NIGGA!
smurfsarwales 9
that was the point of my comment. I'm glad you realized :)
EvilPotato 14
...and left?
Music_Is_Life101 0
She probably didn't make him a sandwich ;)
rrrmmmvvv 0
No #115 by took op ment he stayed there with all of her stuff.
docscientist 9
I think stealing virginity is just called rape in some parts.
DoWorkBro 4
One ghetto boyfriend
IsDazedAndConfus 0
Don't leave your stuff lying around then.
bbucaro98 0
hes a keeper!
amadais 1
the true fml wouldve been if it was anle
OCDC 9
No, the true FML is that you can't even spell "anal".
thomas357 0
nope
taytay6510 6
lost my virginity , call 1-800-single, reward - 2000$ if found
boyguydudemalema 0
thanks 200 i was wondering what he was talking about
ahhhFYL 0
she got owned in multiple ways.
mikeycolloca 0
200- forgive him, he's probably British
lotte678 0
he's probably your boyfriend
Goodnightfortoni_fml 0
Bad joke.
ImmortalKratos 0
....the Bf was black...
minecraft_fml 4
call the cops
pablothepenguin 2
Anyone else notice ops name? gerligirl97..... I'm just hoping that's not how she spells girly and that she wasn't born in 97 losing her virginity...
lilmissy18 1
and yet you still say boyfriend?
PlasmaNuke 0
Was he black?
Seabeast1000 4
That's what you get for being a *****!
Seabeast1000 4
That's what you get for being a *****!
Seabeast1000 4
That's what you get for being a *****!
Kamon97 23
No sympathy here you chose to stay with him so it's your own fault. Hope by now you dumped him
Calyx_fml 21
Yet you call him your "boyfriend".
NomOnShroomz 14
Yeah, she still has a few things left to steal so he hasn't broken up with her yet.
Epilepsy_fml 0
Report theft or just shoot him. But really what's the difference.
sheethapins 13
"911, I need to report my phone, tv, food, laptop, and virginity stolen. I need to get all these things back pronto."
Epilepsy_fml 0
Everyone should just get a giant gold chain with your name and the word virginity on it at birth and that should be considered your virginity. Things would be so much better that way.
WiderWille 11
Why?
xXshadowrollerXx 6
102 - Suppose you go swimming, and must take the chain off, and somebody steals the chain from you. That's a ****** up way to "lose your virginity", don't you think?
Epilepsy_fml 0
That's the point. That way it's proven that your virginity is stupid and pointless. I honestly hate all you people because of the stupid things you hold dear. Sound bigoted and stupid? Yeah it is.
IHeartJimi02 0
Epilepsy, I agree with you in a way. Not about the gold chain but the virginity thing. It's not necessarily stupid but people take virginity way too seriously. People plan on how they will lose it and make it out to be something special and magical. Most of the time it doesn't go as planned and there is nothing magical about it.
ribbyc80 0
everybody knows the more you treat a girl/woman like shit the more they become attached.
monnanon 13
Only stupid women become more attatched if they are treated badly.
tencalories 3
girls like assholes women like confidence
Tempsey 0
There are many stupid women out there it seems.
Awahso 25
I guess it wasn't a cheap date.
volley4eva1698 0
he musta gave her a good *******
unluckydude100 7
you sure know how to pick em
sydney184829 0
And yet u have your iPhone to post an fml... strange.
futtbuck101 1
you better get that food back
jellitonoctopus 19
I agree!
changesinme 0
before they turn nasty
ariannaimelda 7
because the food's all that matters
Silenthunter 0
It was sarcasm dumbass
ariannaimelda 7
I was being sarcastic too genius
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
haha silenthunter haha
salvorican 24
Dude... The food is all that matters. U take my food I bite u -_-
Sensquared 1
no one touches my food. take my Virginity instead.
lalagurl11 6
Ya cuz that's what really matters
hiyourcute 0
I guess your sex faces are ugly?
blackxlinerxrun 0
what does that have to do with anything?
XxToriwolfxX 0
Her "sex faces" were so horrifying that he decided to move to an entirely new continent an start a new life to forget the faces, and he decided he would need food and entertainment for the trip, and he was a little short on cash, so he "borrowed" from her.
eatingpizza 0
Like your pic (not in a sexual way) (:
HeartAndSoul2011 0
u saying her sex faces are ugly when your profile picture isn't exactly the prettiest thing I've ever seen
randiZ25 0
awe looks like someones found a keeper!
eog314 0
i get it..it's clever cuz he "keeps things". damn how witty...
amadais 1
29 u mean burgerular?
meggieh815 0
^^^ no. no he doesn't.
IHeartJimi02 0
burgerular???
abcdefg123456_sg 0
"burger ruler"? lol
Re4mstr 0
a taker :3
MA_COTA 0
ur an idiot
pedobear123 0
ur nt an idit eithr ;)
chimcharx3 15
YDI o.p.
Bano360 25
Why does she deserve it? Inconsiderate jerk.
ProhibitionRose 14
because OP was like "ima let him pop my cherry and rob me!" clearly she didn't know what kind of guy he was...
FliPsliCE 3
And you had no idea he was like that? Dunbass.
BruisedGiraffe 15
I agree. OP is a dunbass
hiyourcute 0
I've dated a dunbass before. Not fun.
MissFukMyLuck 0
there are some MANIPULATIVE people out there! watch it happen to you, you'll never see it coming. don't bash the poor girl because she had to learn a lesson the hard way. asshole$
freddyisepic 2
All you dunasses are so dun...
pepper477 6
well OP is kind of a dunbass, but I mean give them a break they must feel bad enough.
pepper477 6
well OP is kind of a dunbass, but I mean give them a break they must feel bad enough.
nolaneldridge 1
spell dumbass right then we can talk about it
esther_rose 0
No, you're the *Dumbass.
FliPsliCE 3
trooooooolled.
FliPsliCE 3
and troooooolled.
Clay_K 17
I love the irony in that statement :D
jklol11 0
that's one he'll of a boyfriend then...
dreiv330 0
he'll sure was!
superfluousfrog 6
autocorrect?
jklol11 0
yeah it didn't work