Intimacy: Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus's new music video, I...

By notguilty - 15/08/2009 23:24 - United States

Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus's new music video, I had an itch near my bikini line that I couldn't reach through my jeans. So I unzipped my pants to get to it, and that's when my boyfriend walked in on me with my hands down my pants. He thought I was getting off on the music video. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 459

You deserved it 22 947

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 01/03/2011 16:21 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 036

You deserved it 45 840

Pissed

By Matt - 13/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 175

You deserved it 501

By callie - 18/06/2011 06:08 - United States

Today, I got some really bad mosquito bites on the outside of my thighs. They itched, and my jeans prevented me from scratching them, so I unbuttoned my pants, stuck my down my leg and started scratching. My mom walked in, and won't believe I wasn't masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 948

You deserved it 6 641

By Hormones apparently - 08/12/2015 02:32 - United States - Westerville

Today, I was so inexplicably horny that I had to shuffle awkwardly and use my bag to hide the wetness of my pants as I left work for the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 972

You deserved it 3 551

By shit.... - 08/11/2012 18:25 - Malaysia - Kuala Selangor

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 632

You deserved it 31 344

By Tiana - 29/01/2012 02:34 - Canada

Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 340

You deserved it 9 264

By megaladon - 28/06/2010 08:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 869

You deserved it 37 445

By wastedlove - 23/06/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, I had sex with this guy who I like very much. As he went to leave I decided to give him one last thrill. So I reached down his pants and started to rub and stroke him. He abruptly pulled my hand out, when I asked why, he points behind me, my mom watched the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 078

You deserved it 73 888

By shaggy - 30/08/2009 21:26 - Canada

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend getting it on with the neighbour's daughter. As soon as he saw me, he started singing "It Wasn't Me" by Shaggy, completely naked, still sitting with the girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 934

You deserved it 4 889

Cheeky

By Anonymous - 29/08/2009 04:10 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini bottoms off, so I started to walk backwards to step out of it. Little did I know that I had pushed the door open. My fiancé, his family, and my family all saw me bend over naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 562

You deserved it 8 619

Lisimal 7

Sunday 16 August 2009 9:04

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!! YDI for even looking at that beaver face.

ladycoyote 0

Sunday 16 August 2009 9:12

You deserve it for voluntarily watching Miley Cyrus do anything.

Comments

katies94 0

Saturday 19 March 2011 4:09

did he ask to help?

xX_LilSammie_Xx 4

Thursday 31 March 2011 10:24

You should have thrown your head back and started moaning and squirming on your chair.

sannamm 5

Saturday 2 April 2011 12:54

YDI for watching Miley Cyrus!!!!!

Rxoxdx 0

Thursday 2 February 2012 0:16

Boy walks in Boooooooiiiiiiinnng

gymnast4life77 17

Saturday 2 March 2013 22:42

Well this is awkward,...... XD

breezyblue33 19

Thursday 4 July 2013 14:55

Nearly four years after OP's FML, I think there are actually people who fap to Miley now that she's all grown up and twerking. Hahaha.

ZeusBeDubsteppin 24

Sunday 28 December 2014 17:52

heh heh thats what you get for listening to that

nick124699 5

Wednesday 13 May 2015 9:04

Did you have to "Climb" to climax?

Keywords

Allergies Vegan Customers Work Airplanes Money Airport Transportation Technology Sports Health Embarrassing Healthy Lifestyle Gross Toilet Poopoo peepee Relatable Awkward Drugs Parenting Kids Love Grandparents Social Media Death Scary Relationship advice Lonely Miscellaneous Proposal

The Top

Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 014

You deserved it 4 088

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower. Instead, I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 219

You deserved it 10 330

The Top

Today, my boyfriend of over a year and I were discussing how neither of us is the other's usual "type". I explained that I usually go for insular asshole types and then asked him what made me different from his usual choices. He said "Oh, well, I usually go for the attractive ones." FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 864

You deserved it 11 899

Today, I arrived at the airport only to find my suitcase was lost and my 3 weeks worth of clothes and supplies gone. All I had left was my wallet and carry ons. Upon leaving the airport I was mugged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 885

You deserved it 3 572

Today, my girlfriend who was planning on waiting until marriage for sex decided to have sex with me. It's been 4 hours and she hasn't stopped crying, praying and calling me the devil's temptation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 136

You deserved it 18 027

Today, I went on the best date of my life with someone I’ve admired for a very long time. On the car ride home, she vomited all over my lap and informed me that she’s moving across the country next week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 871

You deserved it 360

Today, I'm again stuck with my colleague for another monologue off all her divorces, narcissistic mom, drunk father, sex-obsessed husband, autistic children, and her aggressive dog she had to put to sleep. I feel like I give her a 7-hour free therapy sessions, sucking all the life out of me instead of doing my real job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 963

You deserved it 131

Today, I was doing my nightly check of my daughter's phone since a recent stint in the psych hospital, and saw that she had fallen into a peaceful sleep to watching videos on a website dedicated to watching people die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 562

You deserved it 145

Same thing different taste

Pissed

Cheeky

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