Love: Today, the girl I like sent me a Facebook message telling me...

By 713 - 29/08/2010 01:36 - United States

Today, the girl I like sent me a Facebook message telling me how the message I left on her phone was one of the funniest drunk dials she's ever gotten. I'm debating whether or not I should tell her that I don't drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 503

You deserved it 4 189

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Assumptions

By FreeTacos_ - 28/10/2015 05:23 - United States - Pueblo

Today, I told my crush that I liked her a lot. She told me not to message her when I'm drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 525

You deserved it 2 731

Boring

By Anonymous - 24/10/2009 14:58 - Canada

Today, after drunk texting a girl the night before, I sent her a message saying I was sorry for everything I said. All she could say back? "Those were some of the most normal drunk texts I have ever read. I'd hate to see how boring you'd be sober." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 439

You deserved it 7 606

Party animal

By Anonymous - 23/11/2021 16:58

Today, I got this beautiful girl's number at a bar. After the night was over, I was pretty drunk and sent too many drunk Snapchats. When I'd sobered up, I deleted them. She asked why I deleted them, so I said because I was drunk and didn't remember what I sent. She hasn't messaged me back since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 263

You deserved it 1 288

By badluckryan - 25/09/2012 13:38 - United States - Uxbridge

Today, I received a drunken prank call from a girl I didn't know around 1am. I don't know what's sadder, that I carried out the conversation for 30 minutes, or that this was the first girl to call me in over a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 523

You deserved it 2 952

Let down

By MoxyR12 - 24/06/2009 15:33 - United States

Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 802

You deserved it 5 707

By sober - 12/02/2009 02:09 - United States

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 79 376

You deserved it 4 325

Who'll tell him?

By Anonymous - 03/03/2023 12:00 - Japan

Today, the girl I like said she was out drinking with a friend. I'm pretty sure she has been lying about all the times she has "fallen asleep" and could not talk, and is actually seeing other people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 784

The hangover from hell

By jeannie - 20/09/2023 14:00 - Canada - Montréal

Today, slightly drunk from a head-frazzle of a night out from hell, I sent a text meant for my friend recounting the terrible date I'd just been on… to the date himself. He replied with, "I know, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 870

By drunkdial - 06/01/2010 05:53 - France

Today, I realized that the only time my girlfriend ever calls me is when she's drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 343

You deserved it 4 608

By Andrew - 02/01/2014 23:49 - Portugal - Lisbon

Today, I sent a message on Facebook to a girl I really like. She replied, "..." It took me three hours to realize she'd actually written it. I thought it was just Facebook telling me she was typing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 098

You deserved it 8 569

ks0300 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:03

that is ******* hilarious. You just made my day

Golden_massimo 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:08

just think how funny you are drunk

Comments

Golden_massimo 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:08

just think how funny you are drunk

hahaiseeyou 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:11

19- he's not gonna get anything out of it though, she obviously doesn't like him if she thinks that

Unbannedban 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:11

:) I moderated this, that makes me Boss GUESS WHAT BOSS? I'M WEARING GUCCI!!

xxjoseph1543xx 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:19

Tell her you don't drink but your friends dared you that one time

I_have_no_clue 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 15:13

Just like it shows how "week" you are at spelling?

far_east 6

Sunday 29 August 2010 16:13

grammar nazi.. not everyones 100% in engrish phaggot

perdix 29

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:25

Tell her you had a stroke. That worked for the person in the previous FML ;)

Hikarishimizu 13

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:26

..What the hell did you say, man?

Jessi_the_sexii 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:27

tell her you weren't drinking you were just eating beer battered fish(:

iron_chefITALY 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 11:21

^^this right herr made me laught

fmlfailz 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:28

fail

surrender1123 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:29

sounds like a bitch find someone else

spiderbesideher 0

Sunday 29 August 2010 9:34

tell someone who gives a shit

Keywords

Awkward Love Work Relatable Students Racism Pregnancy Relationship advice Health Cheating Teenagers Friends Intimacy Sex Embarrassing Food Revenge Boredom Animals Cats Management Kids Parenting Sexism Parents Weird Miscellaneous Job interview Facebook Social Media

The Top

Today, I'd thought I was somewhat friends with a girl, the only person I actually talked to outside of school, but after overhearing a discussion I think she may actually have restricted me on Instagram, because I've "always pissed me off anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 92

Today, someone left a used condom under the windshield wiper of my car. I didn't notice it until I was driving. And it was raining. It was even tied, so the contents couldn't leak out. I'm not planning artificial insemination anytime soon, but thanks for the thought. Man, I love college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 787

You deserved it 3 097

The Top

Today, my husband got home from hospital following a suicide attempt that was a hair's breadth from being successful, and told me he did it because he can’t handle being married, being a father, having responsibilities, then he moved out and refuses to come home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 325

You deserved it 169

Today, a little kid accidentally ran into me at the pool. He apologized by biting my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 291

You deserved it 3 220

Today, I came home from a nine-hour shift and all I want is to sit down with a glass of Baileys. I can't find the key to the liquor cabinet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 971

You deserved it 449

Today, I got a call about a job interview, saying I was hired. I was ecstatic, until they called me back and said they'd called the wrong applicant. They called again later, saying there'd been a mistake and I really was hired. When I went in to confirm it, they said they'd never heard of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 628

You deserved it 3 077

Today, while having a break up fight with my fiancée, she informed me that the paternity of our unborn child was in question because one of the other guys couldn't remember if he got off or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 476

You deserved it 262

Today, I was working when my boss left briefly, leaving me with her elderly, senile mother. Not only did I have to chase her when she ran after a stranger on the road, I turned my back for 5 seconds to do my actual job and she walked off. When my boss returned, I had to tell her I lost her mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 045

You deserved it 1 103