Miscellaneous: Today, the estranged crumbs in my toaster caught light while...

By thebravelittletoaster - 20/03/2011 20:32 - United Kingdom

Today, the estranged crumbs in my toaster caught light while I was making breakfast. The toast, toaster, and my wooden bench are now little more than collateral damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 357

You deserved it 9 851

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

Student life

By gofixmyhead - 30/08/2011 14:53 - United Kingdom

Today, in the flat I share with four students, I broke our toaster. The night before, they'd successfully managed to toast chicken soup-covered crumpets in it whilst drunk. I tried to toast a teacake, and the whole thing exploded in flames and smoke. Our toaster got taken out by a raisin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 132

You deserved it 3 998

Shocking!

By Toasted - 29/04/2019 20:00

Today, in an attempt to be frugal, I tried to repair my own sometimes-faulty toaster. Turns out I unplugged the wrong kitchen appliance, which I only discovered by electrocuting myself while pulling it apart. Now it's definitely broken, will need replacing, and I have a burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 856

You deserved it 2 561

By im_a_mocker - 28/01/2009 23:35 - United States

Today, I decided to make a toaster scramble. I thought it was bad enough when the pastry fell through the grate in the toaster over. Then it burst into flames. After 5 minutes of fanning the smoke away from the smoke detector, it still went off. Now my entire dorm building is outside in a snowstorm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 294

You deserved it 5 899

By Anonymous - 23/01/2012 22:07 - United States

Today, my kids tried to make grilled cheese by turning the toaster sideways. When all was done, it all flew out onto the kitchen floor. Both my kids and my husband left the mess there for me to clean up when I got home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 385

You deserved it 3 261

By Anonymous - 07/04/2014 17:02 - Canada

Today, I noticed something written on the top of my toaster, so I used a finger to clear away some of the crumbs, burning my finger in the process. The writing? "CAUTION: Hot surface!" Thanks, toaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 002

You deserved it 48 787

Masterchef

By Uh-SLEEP - 11/12/2020 03:01 - United States - Litchfield Park

Today, our stove broke. Now, we have to cook using a toaster oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 604

You deserved it 75

Bad day?

By Anonymous - 16/02/2021 11:01

Today, after waking up to a spilled bottle of juice on my clothes, I heard my ex died. Whilst baking cookies to distract myself, I melted my work laptop on the toaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 929

You deserved it 291

My home hates me

By Anonymous - 24/07/2015 02:13 - United States - San Francisco

Today, over the course of three hours, I was burned by our toaster oven, hit in the head by a fridge door, hit my toes on a chair, clipped my hip on a table edge, and had both the washer and dryer lids slam on the same hand. I'm not sure what hurts more, my body or the shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 243

You deserved it 4 315

It's toast

By Crying - 16/04/2017 02:00

Today, I no longer have a toaster. My younger sister put it in the bath because apparently it looked dirty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 766

You deserved it 363

By thatchick3333 - 08/03/2012 07:13 - United States

Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 480

You deserved it 6 937

jinxthejinx 0

Monday 21 March 2011 0:57

Looks like you relied heavily on your thesaurus to write this FML. Unless you usually speak using awkward, slightly out-of-context high school vocabulary words.

The_grumpy_bear 0

Sunday 20 March 2011 23:33

I guess for next time you will clean out your toaster more often.

Comments

creedaddict 9

Monday 21 March 2011 3:36

clean ur stuff man

EmoGiana 0

Monday 21 March 2011 3:42

No your mom you adorable puppy! XD

nerdwithagun 0

Monday 21 March 2011 3:53

That's true, but has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

sweetonsno 1

Monday 21 March 2011 4:19

Whether the toaster is clean or not, you should keep an eye on it. Smell smoke? Cancel it. No fire will spread that fast, unless you poured vodka on it. Watch cooking food!