By thebravelittletoaster - 20/03/2011 20:32 - United Kingdom

Today, the estranged crumbs in my toaster caught light while I was making breakfast. The toast, toaster, and my wooden bench are now little more than collateral damage. FML
I agree, your life sucks 22 357
You deserved it 9 851

Same thing different taste

Top comments

jinxthejinx 0

Looks like you relied heavily on your thesaurus to write this FML. Unless you usually speak using awkward, slightly out-of-context high school vocabulary words.

The_grumpy_bear 0

I guess for next time you will clean out your toaster more often.

Comments

NancyDeebensDPDS 0

Yeah, you must like fire, because your face is burned.

FCChelsea 3

clean the toaster with your lazy azz self

birds_fml 7

Clean out your damn toaster once in a while and this won't happen. YDI

pepelapew 0
oblio 0

right? I just can't even think what that could mean.

Two of the crumbs had a falling out. One got custody of the toaster, the other got the wooden bench.

jinxthejinx 0

Looks like you relied heavily on your thesaurus to write this FML. Unless you usually speak using awkward, slightly out-of-context high school vocabulary words.

zowieandzander77 1

ha I was going to say the same thing... put away the thesaurus and start cleaning.

This has nothing to do with OP being British. It's the written equivalent of fingernails down a blackboard in any variant of the language.

That is true. I don't care if you're British, you don't need to sound like an arrogant a prick "formulating" your FML.

chicago4star 0

Agreed. I'm British and it made me wince

boomsupersonic 0

Maybe clean the toaster out more often? I don't ever clean my toaster, though, and it hasn't lit up, so I'm thinking this may not be real. Unless someone else here has had this experience.

conman531 23

You shoulda said "The toast, toaster and wooden bench are toast.

holymolybro 0

estranged??? why were you not on speaking terms with your bread crumbs??? the fact that your toaster and bench caught on fire sucks, but I think calling it "collateral damage" is a bit of a stretch also.....

Maybe if she'd made an effort to reconcile with her bread crumbs, they wouldn't have burnt her kitchen down.