Intimacy: Today, my roommate demanded that I dance naked for him as a birthday... - FML

By Creeped_out_n_stuck - 05/08/2011 04:46 - United States

Spicy

Today, my roommate demanded that I dance naked for him as a birthday present. When I declined, he offered to pay me. When I declined again, he stormed off to pout in his room and played really loud depressing music. We're both guys and I have 11 months left on my lease with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 542

You deserved it 3 726

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Same thing different taste

Revenge is sweet

By Anonymous - 09/06/2015 20:52 - Ireland

Spicy

Today, my housemate got back at me for asking for her share of a bill by losing her virginity to the guy I like, very loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 690

You deserved it 2 839

Roommate from hell #457

By Theguyinthedark - 30/06/2016 13:23 - Bangladesh

Today, my roommate and I were watching TV, and he ordered a pizza. After it was delivered, I took a slice. He yelled at me for taking his food and told me to stop mooching off him. I had to cover his rent last month and he still hasn't paid me back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 153

You deserved it 1 150

Not helping

By StillUnemployed - 11/10/2021 20:00

Today, I received a call from a potential employer. I was excited, until my roommate starts loudly moaning sexually in the background. The interviewer got offended and hung up. My roommate did it because I "made her" pay my half of the rent this month. FYI, I’m unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 200

You deserved it 188

Cost of living crisis

By Jaded618 - 05/12/2010 12:48 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of eleven months broke up with me, but adamantly insisted I didn't move out of our apartment, because he can't pay the rent alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 561

You deserved it 3 934

By mackamuir - 01/04/2016 13:01 - Australia - Gold Coast

Today, my roommate played a crazy April Fool's joke on me by not paying his rent this month. Good one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 948

You deserved it 1 787

By Awkward - 04/02/2010 16:03 - France

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, claiming moving in was a bad idea and he is the type who needs his privacy. It was his idea to move in, he had to convince me. Now we are stuck, under lease together for the next 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 863

You deserved it 3 711

Gross

By Sticky floor - 27/07/2018 05:00

Today, my best friend and roommate has decided to "stop being controlled by society" while at home. This involves him walking around naked, masturbating whenever he wants, and not cleaning up his guys. I've stepped in it three times already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 862

You deserved it 384

By gutsforme - 11/08/2010 10:40 - New Zealand

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he wanted for for his birthday in a couple of days. He replied "to be single" and walked out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 380

You deserved it 4 481

By sen - 19/02/2009 21:41 - United States

Today, I was sleeping when my roommate walked in and asked me: "So… when are you leaving?" She had decided to throw a party in our apartment. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 391

You deserved it 2 634

Threesome weirdness

By Anonymous - 08/10/2020 02:01

Spicy

Today, my roommate informed me that I need to move out, due to me having sex with his boyfriend. Even though he gave us permission, and told us to use protection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 589

You deserved it 1 228

Next

Top comments

gusgus36 5

Friday 5 August 2011 11:56

Well, that will be a fun 11 months...

imustbeinsane 2

Friday 5 August 2011 12:01

how much money are we talking about?

Comments

nomnom5559922 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 3:32

Flash him and shake your hips!! XD

roobear 2

Saturday 6 August 2011 3:53

FML moderators are ******* Nazis. Peace out faggots.

BennyBear 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 4:02

So do the guy a favor. it IS his birthday after all.

meintx 9

Saturday 6 August 2011 4:54

lol. sleep with the door locked and a baseball bat close by.

iMagzzzy 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 5:05

A couple jack daniels and the rest is smooth sailing!

FailureFYL 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 5:26

Bastard! He's gay

arin2009 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 5:38

mushroom stamp his face lol

XoMxcted 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 5:38

Cpme on dude, we all know your into that, dont lie you did it for free ;)

derbylovespie 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 6:09

that made my day

Fmls4life 6

Saturday 6 August 2011 6:16

Gay faggots

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Here's the latest video from our friends at 10secondtraumas.com, enjoy! Kay Akana, co-founder of 10secondtraumas.com, is also a stand-up comedian in LA. Do go and check out her performances, she did manage to make us lot laugh! ...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 12

Today, it's our ten-year anniversary, and I thought finally we would break our 10-month dry spell with some action. My husband had dozed off and was snoring even before I could reach the bed after finishing my chores. So much for happily ever after… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 487

You deserved it 330

The Top

Today, after 3 days of insomnia, I was able to finally fall asleep, just for there to be a fire in the apartment building about 15 minutes later. My mom called me selfish for waking her up in the middle of the night to ask if I could stay with her, and told me I better not rent a hotel room with the money I owe her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 034

You deserved it 87

Today, I realized that I can recognize each member of my disgusting family by the sound and smell of their farts. I can’t wait to move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 410

You deserved it 383

Today, my professor tried to scare the hiccups out of me. Some pee came out instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 493

You deserved it 4 252

Today, my 71-year-old grandmother survived cancer for the fourth time. I'm grateful, but at the same time I find myself feeling sad that she will soon be gone. She has COPD and constantly mentions that she is going to die soon. I wish I could build a time machine and go back to before she became terminally ill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 912

You deserved it 98

Today, as I was driving to work, I witnessed a kid apparently getting jumped. Being a good citizen, I got out and started yelling at them. I ended up alongside the kid in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 876

You deserved it 4 624

Today, I went to the store to buy new blankets and a comforter. A cute guy started chatting with me and asked about the new bedroom decor. I lied and said I just had a major break up and needed new things, instead of admitting I was too lazy to dig out and wash my winter blankets from last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 842

You deserved it 3 320