Intimacy: Today, my pregnant wife was crying, so I let her sit on my lap...

By anonymous - 09/09/2013 20:16 - United States - Round Rock

Today, my pregnant wife was crying, so I let her sit on my lap so I could comfort her. She quickly started laughing in embarrassment as she peed on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 873

You deserved it 6 860

May weddings: Love and blunders
Weddings are supposed to be perfect, but our stories show that perfection can sometimes be... surprising! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

The bed is lava

By for better or for farts - 06/08/2020 23:01

Today, my very pregnant wife woke up in bed, grabbing her stomach and writhing in pain. Worried that the baby might be in distress, I asked her what was wrong. She gasped then let out what can only be described as a river of hot liquid shit all over herself and my legs. We both cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 394

You deserved it 198

By levi Glasscock - 15/04/2011 13:52 - United States

Today, my mom called me and said, "I made your sister laugh so hard she peed her pants." I got home and noticed she also peed on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 128

You deserved it 2 981

By queen_lol - 10/05/2016 17:14 - United States

Today, I was at a party at my boyfriend's house. As I was walking past him, he pulled me onto his lap and started introducing me to a childhood friend. I sneezed and accidently peed on him. I'm 6 months pregnant and can't control my bladder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 508

You deserved it 2 180

By Nurse - 31/08/2018 15:00

Today, a pregnant woman asked me to give her a demonstration on how to push when having a baby. I agreed and pushed, but I may have pushed a little too hard because I shat myself. The pregnant woman laughed and said she was hoping that would happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 874

You deserved it 750

By bootyislife - 03/02/2015 04:36 - United States - Seattle

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to give me a naked massage. She straddled my back and started rubbing, then she sneezed and peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 248

You deserved it 4 984

By Anonymous - 15/09/2014 18:48 - United Kingdom - Liverpool

Today, I took a shit of biblical proportions. I flushed and opened a window, but my pregnant wife went in straight after me. Her morning sickness kicked in and she quickly ran out, vomit dripping from her mouth. She's pissed and thinks I planned the whole thing as a prank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 177

You deserved it 4 385

Hello from the other side

By losthusband - 11/10/2020 20:01 - United States

Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 153

You deserved it 197

By Username - 05/11/2010 22:02 - France

Today, I was reading to a child during nap time because she woke up crying. She calmed down right after I began reading, but soon started crying again. I was confused until I felt something warm and wet on my leg. She peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 027

You deserved it 3 628

I'm in a hurry

By Anonymous - 20/01/2020 20:00

Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 535

You deserved it 142

By amburrr - 03/08/2009 00:59 - United States

I agree, your life sucks 57 875

You deserved it 2 661

vrossie_ 15

Tuesday 10 September 2013 0:03

Well, at least you made her laugh! Right?

slooby_fml 25

Tuesday 10 September 2013 0:03

She's just preparing you for what a child will be like

Comments

jessBeAqueen 13

Tuesday 10 September 2013 0:18

hopefully you continued to comfort. it was a very sweet gesture. I'm sure she appreciated it.

Fiakealii 1

Tuesday 10 September 2013 0:23

Um, you try not peeing randomly when your bladder is being smooshed to 1/4 its normal size :p

clh3031 6

Tuesday 10 September 2013 1:00

Yep, watch out for sneezes and coughs as well, OP.

Korra_fml 23

Tuesday 10 September 2013 0:30

awh thats so kind of u to comfort her. of course she was embarrassed... just be glad it was only a little pee, rather than having her water break on u. theres SO much more when that happens. pregnancy tends to be FULL of embarrassing moments, made worse when they are completely unexpected. trust me, if u had a baby bouncing on ur bladder, u'd accidentally pee too... even if somehow u didnt feel the need. don't know how far she is into the pregnancy, but other places will leak too (boobs)... so be prepared for that as well.

HockeyGirlLover 7

Tuesday 10 September 2013 0:30

Well look at the bright side at least it was your wife that you love that peed on you and not a rhino :p congregations to you and your wife on the baby though :)

DLT_fml 20

Tuesday 10 September 2013 1:57

Yes, many congregations! Especially after the baby is born and your family members wish to meet the little one. ;)

More_Leg 14

Tuesday 10 September 2013 0:38

Sorry OP, it happens. And laughing is a way to cope with embarrassment. Just shake it off and pretend you don't mind even though it sucks. It'll all be worth it when you hold that baby in your arms the first time :) good luck!