Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked,...

By Anonymous - 15/09/2011 23:54 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 971

You deserved it 26 604

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

Quick, hide!

By Mattyboy - 24/08/2009 09:57 - United States

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend at her house. When things started heating up, I heard the front door open and my girlfriend said that it must be her Dad. She handed me my clothes, pushed me out the window, and told me to knock at the front door. Her Dad answered, holding my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 929

You deserved it 18 640

All kinds of wrong

By Anonymous - 10/04/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I had my girlfriend over after my wife went to work. She looked so sexy in her outfit, I couldn’t resist. I ripped her clothes off and began to do her on my couch… until I heard my daughter’s voice asking, “Dad, who’s that?” Apparently, she was home sick from school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72

You deserved it 1 019

By unbelievable208 - 05/08/2009 05:28 - United States

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it, I whispered in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I then heard behind me, "I am." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 641

You deserved it 86 671

By policeopenup - 11/07/2009 19:38 - United States

Today, my girlfriend threw me on the couch as I walked in the door. I butt dialed my mom in the process. My girlfriend took off my pants and we got to business. After about 30 seconds of hearing what was going on, my mom thought something was wrong and called the cops to my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 377

You deserved it 8 733

By mal - 08/05/2012 20:46 - United Kingdom - Chelmsford

Today, I brought my girlfriend home while my parents were at work, and things got a little heated. We lost track of time, because the next thing we knew, my dad burst into the living room. He doubled over laughing and asked how much I paid her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 160

You deserved it 6 257

By Anonymous - 01/10/2009 14:06 - Canada

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I was on their bed having sex with their daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 905

You deserved it 39 500

Back to reality

By Anonymous - 24/12/2012 18:02 - United Kingdom - Saint Neots

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 948

You deserved it 28 264

Kinky

By sad_dad - 24/10/2009 17:35 - Canada

Today, I got home from work and heard the shower in my bathroom running. Thinking my wife was taking a shower, I got completely undressed and walked in. My wife wasn't in the shower. Instead, I found my daughter and her boyfriend in the shower, making out. There was an awkward moment of silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 172

You deserved it 10 310

By orcatheseapanda - 09/01/2016 05:14 - Thailand

Today, I was stretching on the balcony, when I heard my neighbor's daughter scream. She was playing in their kiddie pool and thought I was peeping on her. And now her parents think so too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 176

You deserved it 1 413

Caught in 4K

By Anonymous - 22/03/2009 13:04 - Malta

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 196 630

You deserved it 34 714

illmatic2 16

Friday 16 September 2011 8:50

Obviously a MILF.

s0m3guy2010 21

Friday 16 September 2011 9:10

I bet OP really wishes he had a moment with a Twix bar.

Comments

death_rose567 4

Tuesday 20 September 2011 2:58

That's not an fml. More like a "**** yeah bro!" you could **** her mother! Well.. If she is hot.

LilaBear 1

Tuesday 20 September 2011 4:33

Baaaaaaahahahahahahahahahaha. Sorry, but that's just hilarious.

auddylynne 0

Tuesday 20 September 2011 5:19

Hahaha! Busted lol

panvicka 16

Saturday 24 September 2011 23:54

10 000 showers wouldnt be enough....

umHeyWhatsUp 0

Tuesday 27 September 2011 7:45

Say "hell yea!" then run.

belkinbra 12

Sunday 2 October 2011 3:44

She must be attractive if you thought she was your gf. I say propose a threesome.

gurly98 13

Wednesday 12 October 2011 5:58

You totally deserved that

Mayshod 3

Saturday 29 October 2011 15:20

You're all assuming they are both hot. Fat ugly people sunbathe too. How do you know they aren't both beefalos and he's just a chubby chaser that couldn't distinguish whose fat rolls he was fondling because of the sunlight being reflected off pasty skin....eeewwwwww.