FML is the new Facebook, everyone posts their personal problems wanting attention

Good riddance

call him. if he answers just say **** you and hang up

I understand. My father would call me almost daily to scream and threaten me since I moved. I had to change my number. If you have siblings, or other family members, please call them instead to find out. That way you get what you want, without giving him the satisfaction of calling him. I'm sorry for your pain and I hope all goes well

His not around.. Enjoy your say!

so much time hoping and then when it might be it's actually worrisome

I get what other commenters are saying about you not being able to reach out... but why not call from an unrecognizable number (pay phone, someone else's phone) and hang up once you hear his voice? Alternately, you can get someone else to call and fake being a telemarketer. Either way, don't suffer more thinking about it-- he's put you through more than enough.

Sorry to say op but I think you're better off without that piece of garbage. I know he's your father but no parent should ever lay a hand on their child. Don't even bother with him. Consider it a blessing he hasn't called

you sound like a good person. not many people have a heart like that, keep it.

Well, that's family bonds for ya. My dad has been through a similar situation with his dad, but once in a while he still seems to worry about him.