Miscellaneous: Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking...

By Anonymous - 30/05/2015 03:07 - United States - Salem

Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking "too close" to her plants. I was on the sidewalk. She sprayed me with her hose anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 617

You deserved it 2 117

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Same thing different taste

Piss off

By Anonymous - 02/05/2023 12:00

Today, I had to deal with my crazy new neighbour who tried to physically stop me from laying my new driveway, on my property, because she claimed she’s allergic to cement while it’s still wet. Even if that were true, piss off back to your house away from the wet cement then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 984

You deserved it 82

Walked into her trap

By yikes - 18/03/2023 10:00

Today, I learned the VERY hard way that if you’re gonna go onto your neighbor’s property, yell at them for parking on your side of the street, and threaten to call the city on them, then you should probably make sure she doesn’t have pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 154

You deserved it 1 695

Don't mind me

By Anonymous - 16/04/2012 12:38 - United States - West Palm Beach

Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 004

You deserved it 3 393

Creepy Susan

By pretty_coin - 23/10/2011 01:02 - Australia

Today, I'm hiding in my own house, because my crazy neighbor wants to "play." Yesterday when I agreed, she made me spend the whole day with her, then burst into tears when I had to leave. She's been waiting outside for over two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 313

You deserved it 3 568

By inyobeddd - 02/05/2013 08:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my crazy neighbor came up to me in the street and slapped me across the face, accusing me of leering through her restroom window while she showered. I'm gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 913

You deserved it 6 710

Cue Shaggy

By scully11 - 02/08/2011 18:36 - Canada

Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 368

You deserved it 3 349

By Cowan - 06/08/2009 12:27 - Belgium

Today, I had to come back home early from my holidays. Why? I had asked my grandmother to water my plants, some of which are illegal. Instead of doing it herself, she asked her neighbor… who is a cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 855

You deserved it 125 358

By Murphs_Law - 16/11/2016 06:37 - United States

Today, my crazy downstairs neighbor was yet again fighting with her boyfriend by slamming every door. When this didn't work, she went downstairs to fight with his grill. She wheeled it to the end of the driveway and pushed it over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 150

You deserved it 802

Avoidance issues

By ProAwkward - 18/06/2013 04:07 - United States - Grand Prairie

Today, as I was walking home, I noticed a man and a woman arguing in their driveway. To avoid an awkward situation, I crossed the street. I then had to walk past a creepy guy watering his plants in his underwear while looking directly at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 785

You deserved it 5 855

By jess - 15/02/2012 17:47 - United States

Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 000

You deserved it 2 397

FrutLoopDingus 19

Saturday 30 May 2015 19:45

You young whippersnappers shouldn't be that close anyways

thewcloner 22

Saturday 30 May 2015 19:45

Maybe they were killer plants?

Comments

vinnerator 7

Saturday 30 May 2015 23:47

At least you got a free shower

False_Stupidity 41

Sunday 31 May 2015 0:32

My first thought was that I hope the OP didn't have any hydrophobic technology in a pocket.

warrior1995 15

Sunday 31 May 2015 1:31

If I was you I would have gone over and ripped her plants out of the ground. You're already wet, the hose can't do anything more!

Madrias 36

Sunday 31 May 2015 1:36

A weed-whacker would do wonders for taking care of her plant problem...

Jade24_fml 11

Sunday 31 May 2015 1:40

I have a landlord like that!

JIMMY_THE_JEW_II 17

Sunday 31 May 2015 2:17

I would spray her with my house the second she walked out of her house

speed150mph 2

Sunday 31 May 2015 2:25

There are only 3 things you can do. You can run away and never go near her again, you can wear a swim suit under your clothes and carry an umbrella, or you can look at her, say this means war, calmly return to your house, and return fire with your garden hose...