Love: Today, my boyfriend woke me up the same way he always does, by...

By wrongguy - 11/05/2013 23:04 - United States - Raleigh

Today, my boyfriend woke me up the same way he always does, by pulling on my hair. Just to be playful, I pulled him down on top of me and kissed him. Turns out his brother thought it would be funny to wake people up the same way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 956

You deserved it 9 701

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Same thing different taste

By SoVeryMonday - 30/11/2009 18:01 - Canada

Today, we rearranged the bedroom and my boyfriend and I switched sides of the bed. When the alarm went off, he got confused as to which side the clock was on. Instead of hitting the snooze button like he normally does, he hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 152

You deserved it 9 520

By Wow - 11/04/2013 12:52 - United States

Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while watching TV. I thought it would be cute to try to kiss him awake like they do in the movies. He farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 247

You deserved it 19 303

By Anonymous - 11/01/2015 08:44

Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 936

You deserved it 2 839

By ohfantastic - 25/01/2009 02:47 - United States

Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 675

You deserved it 2 370

How shocking!

By Anonymous - 04/03/2018 01:30

Today, my brother thought it would be hilarious to put his dog shock collar on me to wake me in lieu of my alarm. You know how those cartoon characters look when they're electrocuted? That's exactly how I woke up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 448

You deserved it 379

By RomanceFail - 02/04/2015 12:51 - United States - Crestwood

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 034

You deserved it 3 378

By Maria - 14/03/2017 15:00 - United Kingdom - York

Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 660

You deserved it 398

By Anonymous - 21/05/2011 21:29 - Denmark

Today, I woke up, rolled over, and kissed the boy who was peacefully sleeping next to me, cheerfully saying, "Good morning, baby!" That boy is my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 414

You deserved it 34 821

So hot

By bonesniffer - 16/09/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, I crawled into bed, naked, wanting to get some, and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass, and said "Oh…" then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 770

You deserved it 6 037

By Anonymous - 06/10/2011 15:23 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 876

You deserved it 11 301

abhi95 31

Sunday 12 May 2013 10:27

Talk about awkward!

EpicSquishii 21

Sunday 12 May 2013 10:29

Keep it in the family :) The royals did it for centuries, see how that worked out?

Comments

worldclassrager 39

Sunday 12 May 2013 23:14

Didn't work out as planned...well I don't think his brother will do that again...

kittenw71 5

Monday 13 May 2013 0:11

Did he kiss you back?

journeytotheend 16

Monday 13 May 2013 1:16

"Oh here's a fun fact.... You made out with your brother"

TVKill3r 15

Monday 13 May 2013 9:40

His brother not hers.

ni0ve 9

Monday 13 May 2013 6:09

good thing it was in the morning whike its bright or it would have gone further and does ur BF wake u up that way anyway??

omgawshglee 4

Monday 13 May 2013 6:40

webshammo 8

Monday 13 May 2013 18:14

Who was better?

Twinn4ever 13

Tuesday 14 May 2013 3:45

Who is the better kisser?

jackaced 7

Tuesday 14 May 2013 5:23

Hope ya weren't nekkid!!

Xotoolyxo 16

Wednesday 15 May 2013 4:10

He just wants some love too!

jtrizzle93 11

Sunday 2 June 2013 7:38

Why the hell was his brother in your bed?

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The Top

Today, I learned that dirty talk does NOT get me off. My boyfriend and I were having sex and I said, "I'm going to come" during the beginning of my orgasm. My orgasm immediately stopped right after I said that. I'd managed to turn myself off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 339

You deserved it 15 971

Today, I've finally got my mental health under control after decades of flailing. I also started showing signs of Serotonin Syndrome, which is caused by my meds and could result in seizure and death. So my choices are the swirling void of depression or possibly just the void. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 92

The Top

Today, I went bowling with some friends. After a few beers I was showing off spinning the ball around on the tip of my finger. One trip to the ER and two crushed nuts later, I've found that mixing alcohol and heavy shiny balls is not a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 358

You deserved it 51 819

Today, I let my imbecile of a brother borrow my car. The keys to his car are now jammed into the ignition of mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 008

You deserved it 4 834

Today, I received a rejection e-mail from a potential employer I interviewed with. I asked for some feedback and they said I didn't seem interested. I had showed extensive interest, even brought up some of the company's recent events, and literally said, "I'm very interested in this position." FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 432

You deserved it 437

Today, my landlord started showing my apartment, where I have lived and paid rent for over 2 years, to prospective tenants. I didn't realize that I was moving. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 993

You deserved it 3 402

Today, my dad and I had an hour-long conversation. When he was getting up to leave my room he said, "Good talk Chelsey." My sister is Chelsey. So I corrected him. He thought I was joking. My father can't tell my sister and I apart. We are not twins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 378

You deserved it 2 529

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend when I began dozing off. I was then awoken by an explosive fart. It was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 768

You deserved it 5 531

Same thing different taste

How shocking!

So hot

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