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Don't know how he managed it, I had been trying for 10 mins before I gave up completely and started masturbating.

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Well, Alan is my wife, but we haven't yet consummated our marriage. When the day comes, I'll let her take the hazmat suit off.

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Seeing Alan and Sirin comment makes me feel alot better about the site. I never see them comment. Except when they're shutting an FML down and closing comments.

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8- holy shit. How many more grammatical and spelling errors can you make? This reminds me of proof-reading this incredibly stupid kid's english paper back in like 5th grade.

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Fun fact: If you have breast implants you're more likely to sink if you're drowning than a person without breast implants!

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