It's a witch!

By umm... - 30/03/2020 23:00 - Australia - Canberra

Today, I caught my boyfriend in the bathtub interrogating his penis and "drowning" it when it wouldn't answer him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 813

You deserved it 334

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/09/2012 14:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 273

You deserved it 30 179

By Pissy - 23/05/2019 06:05

Today, I thought my boyfriend wanted to be romantic by pouring a bath, getting in then calling me in. As I get comfortable, he stands up and gets out. At the same time, I notice yellow water. He'd pissed in the tub for a joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 351

You deserved it 224

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By Anonymous - 19/12/2010 05:24 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom after he had been in there a while. I found him with his pants down, looking at a pimple on his butt in the mirror. He asked me for, "Help." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 869

You deserved it 4 538

By GasAttack - 07/09/2009 13:32 - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 454

You deserved it 8 529

By anony - 27/02/2013 13:49 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 714

You deserved it 6 689

By wtfuraretard - 19/02/2010 20:18 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me over, all just to unclog his toilet. It was clogged because he put my phone in it while he was taking a dump to see if it would actually flush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 009

You deserved it 5 197

YouTubers must be stopped

By TuT - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - France

Today, I found my husband in the bathtub, which was filled with blood-red water, motionless and staring blankly at the ceiling. I started screaming and crying, and he burst into laughter at his "hilarious" prank. He only seemed regretful that his video camera hadn't been recording properly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 577

You deserved it 4 288

By pod - 25/06/2011 23:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend threw me into his pool. I had my phone and iPod in my pockets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 660

You deserved it 5 406

By Today - 07/09/2010 02:26 - United States

Today, I had to play Paper, Rock or Scissors and beat my boyfriend in order to get him to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 294

You deserved it 6 594

By Anonymous - 26/04/2018 01:30

Today, my boyfriend decided to fart in our bathtub to see if it would echo. It wasn’t a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 481

You deserved it 396

Aiden89 23

Monday 30 March 2020 23:31

I’m sorry OP, I genuinely laughed out loud. He sounds hilarious

SexAndStarbucks 12

Tuesday 31 March 2020 3:17

Quarantine day 12 be like...

Comments

Amanda Howard 9

Monday 30 March 2020 23:31

he needs therapy

Aiden89 23

Monday 30 March 2020 23:31

I’m sorry OP, I genuinely laughed out loud. He sounds hilarious

sarkycow 25

Thursday 2 April 2020 16:41

Ditto, and I laughed so loud I woke my husband up. I would still be laughing if I saw my husband doing that.

RichardPencil 30

Monday 30 March 2020 23:50

He's waterboarding his dick? The CIA might recruit him. What kind of operational intelligence did he recover from his ****? Perhaps the location and readiness of some seamen?

Wadlaen 23

Monday 30 March 2020 23:58

One of the risks of drinking before bathing...

JackWood 20

Tuesday 31 March 2020 1:11

Mmmmm wonder who's next? Run and run fast.

WistayShlaio82 13

Tuesday 31 March 2020 2:05

Maybe give him more attention so he’s not so angry?

redvibes23 14

Tuesday 31 March 2020 3:13

What was he even asking

SexAndStarbucks 12

Tuesday 31 March 2020 3:17

Quarantine day 12 be like...

sickerthanyou 13

Tuesday 31 March 2020 4:50

Wouldn’t be better if he punished his penis in you?

katydid91 31

Tuesday 31 March 2020 8:48

To each his own.

Keywords

Health Relatable Public freakouts Music Scams Geek Poopoo peepee Jewelry Awkward Bikes Cops Transportation Fight Family Kids Miscellaneous AITA Mother in law Social Media Love Relationship advice Art Work Students Animals Birds Sleep Noise Mental health Medication

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Today, I'm a graduate of a wealthy public school in So Cal. It astonishes me how many of my classmates don’t see a problem with today’s politicians, or gas, rent, and food prices. I was given shelter but had to earn everything I had growing up. I knew I wasn’t crazy though they acted like I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 345

You deserved it 96

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I agree, your life sucks 480

You deserved it 74

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I agree, your life sucks 27 964

You deserved it 8 578

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I agree, your life sucks 44 216

You deserved it 4 222

Today, I found out I've been adulting too long when I noticed that the bags at Smart & Final are shorter than the last time I was here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 549

You deserved it 152

Today, my wife called me at work to yell at me because the house is a mess. She hasn't helped me clean in over two years, and when I ask for help, there's always a new excuse, headache, tired from work, stress, etc. FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 92

Today, my boyfriend stuck his finger in my butt and I liked it, but I can’t ever tell him that or he’ll get that smug look on his face like, “I told you so, let’s have anal now.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 479

You deserved it 1 404

Today, my family and I are spending the weekend with my in-laws, and their disrespectful, disobedient asshole of a dog. He does whatever he wants, and if I scold him, my mother-in-law in turn scolds me, then tells me how something one of us did is to blame for the dog's behavior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 452

You deserved it 296

It's a witch!

Same thing different taste

Check this out

YouTubers must be stopped

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