By haztod - 30/03/2014 21:52 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, my boyfriend made me sit in his kitchen while he Skyped his mother because he doesn't "feel ready" to tell her he has a girlfriend. He's 23, lives on a different continent and has been dating me for over 6 months. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 849
You deserved it 5 196

haztod tells us more.

haztod 19

Hi, OP here - I'm super surprised this got posted! Just to clear some things up: my boyfriend is American and studying here in the UK. I have met his sister and we get along super well, but not anyone else in his family, nor do they know he's dating someone. From what I understand, his parents - especially his dad - aren't really big on relationships, especially when studying, as they can be seen as a distraction. I know for a fact that it was his mom as they usually do voice calls and I sit quietly, but she wanted a video chat so I shifted rooms on this occasion; there's definitely not another girl in the picture! I spoke to him about it after the call and explained that it upset me a little and made me feel like he had to hide me, and he was very apologetic and felt guilty - he told me this was his first serious relationship and he wasn't really sure what the right steps were in terms of parents or when they should happen which I actually found quite sweet. This is definitely not a deal breaker - he is so wonderful I wouldn't let something like this ruin our relationship! He just Skyped his mom again tonight and told her the news, so it's no longer an issue. He has met all my family and they adore him, so no issues there!

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Top comments

Joshwarrior 39

And that's not a deal breaker for you why?

184 18
xx000o 27

An option would be to walk up to the camera in your birthday suit and tell him you missed your period the last two months.

88 4

Comments

lifesuxxxsc 5

drop his behind! if he's not proud to have you, he doesn't deserve you!

0 6
harmtouch16 11

Yeah I would strip down naked, wrap a towel around my head as if I'd just showered, and casually walk behind him (in view of the camera) eating an apple.

1 3
icepick23 12

If he won't let you be in the room, then that is not his mom he's talking to.

0 5
amisenho 11

From a past experience, I'd agree with this, if only to assume that OP isn't able to hear the conversations her boyfriend is having with his mother on Skype. My ex often locked himself in the bathroom with his iPod for hours, claiming he was chatting with his mother about family issues (I eventually found out that he was chatting with a girl from another state) and asked me not to bother him. He also closed his desktop chat windows any time I walked into his room; when I'd curiously ask who he was talking to, he'd become defensive and end up arguing with me about trusting him (I eventually found out that he was chatting and planning dinner dates with his ex, who was attending a college a few cities away). Unless OP knows, for a fact, that this person he's chatting with is his mother, he could be talking to other people behind her back, and OP would think it's just another conversation with Mom.

1 2
cwl727 32

You should have just popped in and introduced yourself.

0 3
vlalam 24

Haha... Give him some time, eventually they will have to find out on the wedding ceremony atleast

0 0
Phanny141 5

I would side with the people who say it's a cultural thing and that the minute he lets it slips hes got a live in girlfriend they are going to be pushing for marriage; either that or getting on his case about dating outside of his culture. It reminds of the time I was casually dating a mid-eastern man and he told me he wanted to talk to his parents about me then asked me how much my father would expect for a dowry...

5 0
Broscope 8

Wondering why he'd hide it... "mum, dad, I don't know how to tell you this so i'm just gonna come out and say it: I'm straight" Jks, some people just like to keep their family lives separate from their social lives. I'm like that, makes things easier. Not really an issue unless you make it one.

3 1
haztod 19

Hi, OP here - I'm super surprised this got posted! Just to clear some things up: my boyfriend is American and studying here in the UK. I have met his sister and we get along super well, but not anyone else in his family, nor do they know he's dating someone. From what I understand, his parents - especially his dad - aren't really big on relationships, especially when studying, as they can be seen as a distraction. I know for a fact that it was his mom as they usually do voice calls and I sit quietly, but she wanted a video chat so I shifted rooms on this occasion; there's definitely not another girl in the picture! I spoke to him about it after the call and explained that it upset me a little and made me feel like he had to hide me, and he was very apologetic and felt guilty - he told me this was his first serious relationship and he wasn't really sure what the right steps were in terms of parents or when they should happen which I actually found quite sweet. This is definitely not a deal breaker - he is so wonderful I wouldn't let something like this ruin our relationship! He just Skyped his mom again tonight and told her the news, so it's no longer an issue. He has met all my family and they adore him, so no issues there!

128 0
haztod 19

She got all excited and was very pleased for him, which surprised him immensely considering her past viewpoint! I will hopefully get to say hi soon. :)

58 0
Samii00 10

a serious relationship at 6 months?! and the first 'serious' relationship is at 23? that's a bit concerning....

KatzeZauber 7

Not if what the op implied is that he's been forced to focus on studies all his life instead of relationships. I find it quite normal imo

77 0
texaskitty86 25

Seriously Samii? My husband had 1 gf in high school before we started dating when we were both 23. Now it's 5 years later and we've been married for 6 months. So don't even think that having your first serious relationship at 23 means you have problems.

75 0
kissmeImawkward 17

this FML had a great end.I'm happy for you two :D

28 0
Joshwarrior 39

I am glad it's working out (: thanks for clarifying with a follow up

14 0
haztod 19

Thanks very much! This was the only issue in our relationship and now it's been solved, I couldn't be happier - and according to him, neither could he! I just wish I could have posted a clarifying follow up earlier, I get the feeling some people have missed it if they're still telling me to end the relationship... It's a shame the character limit for the FML itself isn't any longer.

31 0
damnit1989 16

Yeah. My boyfriend last gf before me was when he was ten. I was his first real relationship at 24 ( I was 22) and by six months we were already saying I love you. Now we plan to get married and move in together. I don't see any problems with the situation she was in.

9 13
JimmyHasNoHands 7

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7 26
Zeishah 26

YAyy! So happy for you op! Alls well that ends well:)

7 0
woosah 16

Is it? #78 Seems appropriate to me.

2 1
Klairem11 11

I'm so happy that you got everything cleared up

2 0
Fr0gs 15

So rush him into things and end up separate?

2 39