Love: Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend, but in fact, it wasn’t... - FML

By Anonymous - 13/10/2008 08:25

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend, but in fact, it wasn’t her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 295

You deserved it 268

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Top comments

shuyin14 0

Wednesday 4 March 2009 18:00

lol, you shouldn't drink/do drugs/be an idiot

watson_fml 0

Tuesday 24 March 2009 9:21

Don't get yourself into that situation? You have no one to blame but yourself.

Comments

HunterFalls13 0

Friday 19 June 2009 0:00

Oh that was you?

stilwaitin4mybus 0

Tuesday 30 June 2009 14:15

how do you wake up with your girlfriend if it's not her?

Chanelle1 0

Monday 6 July 2009 23:25

reply to #24 because he was probably drunk and had sex with a random girl.

bigraws23 0

Sunday 12 July 2009 6:55

Hope it wasn't a dude

helpmeiamblind 0

Saturday 18 July 2009 0:17

Your girlfriend didn't find out did she?

mylifeisFedUP 0

Monday 3 August 2009 11:33

f your girlfriend's life :(

pulpfiction_fml 3

Thursday 20 August 2009 2:53

Why are we supposed to feel sorry for you? Stop being such a whiny cheating little **** and lay off the vodka man

Shit4Luk 0

Friday 13 November 2009 15:09

Omg, how many of these replies are from 12 year olds and overzealous Christians losers? "It kills brain cells". Brain cells die over time anyways, and as long as you dont do it all day every day, you wont cause significant damage. And "lay off the vodka?". I knew a guy that downed a bottle or two of 180 proof a day, and he never complained about waking up in bed with a woman. And stop bashing women. Dont consider yourself above them. You spend about half your life catering to their every need because they make you horny.

h8mylifesomuch 4

Monday 24 August 2009 18:05

WTF? Then who'd u wake up next to? lol

36damien 0

Tuesday 22 September 2009 0:26

Sounds sweet to me

Ruin11thHour 0

Monday 19 October 2009 5:37

This is the solution: DON'T GO OUT DRINKING! You were obvisously drunk if you slept with this woman. Or, you have sex in the dark. Not smart. FYL

TheButler 0

Wednesday 4 November 2009 17:14

lol it was an accident from him sheesh he's obviously annoyed

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The Top

Today, I was at the grocery store when I bumped into my ex. Trying to be polite, I asked how she was doing, only for her to reply, "Great, thanks! I'm actually getting married next month." Meanwhile, I was standing there in a Garfield t-shirt clutching a carton of Ben & Jerry's and a bottle of cheap wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 192

Today, I found a wallet on the train. I called the owner, who said he would come around and pick it up. When he finally did, he looked inside and screamed that his money was missing, and that I was a dirty thief. I never took a cent. He's filing theft charges against me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 429

You deserved it 4 436

The Top

Today, I was so tired that I thought the item I'd ordered a few months ago had been delivered then stolen, so I emailed the company about it. When I checked back on the website, I realized it hadn't actually been delivered yet and I read the invoice wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 475

Today, I went to the park with my friend and we decided to swing. While we were swinging, we decided to jump off backwards. All would have worked out fine if my pants hadn't gotten caught on the metal of the swing, leaving my bare butt exposed. The man who was in the park with his daughter left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 226

You deserved it 23 604

Today, after having been constipated for ages, I finally forced out a week's worth of build-up. The excruciating pain reduced me to tears, and my boyfriend refused to drive me to the hospital, because according to him, I must have had anal sex with someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 805

You deserved it 3 067

Today, I was stuck in traffic on the highway and decided it was the perfect time to pick a humongous booger out of my nose. While carefully examing and admiring it, I failed to notice that the owner of my company was staring at me from the left lane in complete and utter revulsion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 170

You deserved it 49 917

Today, I realized that my cat has been laid more times than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 154

You deserved it 6 044

Today, I looked into my fiance's Twitter to see he follows tons of "nipslips" and adult/porn pages, even though we've had numerous fights with him making excuses as to how/why I've been "misunderstanding" past issues. At this point I've pretty much bet my life on this guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 975

You deserved it 881