Health: Today, during my beloved's birthday party, I had so much to drink...

By Jigll - 13/10/2008 08:26

Today, during my beloved's birthday party, I had so much to drink that I puked all over the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 653

You deserved it 76 904

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Same thing different taste

By gingerbread - 18/12/2017 18:00 - Armenia - Yerevan

Today, I got a little too drunk at my best friend's birthday party and threw up in the pub bathroom. I wiped everything up, composed myself, and went back to the party table before promptly throwing up on myself in front of the whole pub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 987

You deserved it 3 699

By allennn - 14/03/2010 14:56 - France

Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 923

You deserved it 38 531

Hangover

By Anonymous - 10/11/2019 14:00

Today, I got really sick after drinking a lot of alcohol and started throwing up. Every time I threw up into the toilet, the water would splash back up into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 827

You deserved it 3 151

By Anonymous - 08/08/2019 20:00 - United States

Today, my drunk sister threw up on me while I was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 653

You deserved it 102

Chain reaction

By Anonymous - 03/05/2023 13:30 - Australia

Today, I got drunk and spewed all over my lounge room floor. My dog ate it up, also got drunk, and also eventually spewed on the floor too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 1 120

By hnickell93 - 09/10/2012 01:55 - United States - Visalia

Today, I was consoling my drunk husband as he violently emptied his stomach contents into our toilet. One particular retch made me nauseous, and I vomited all down his back, causing him to turn his head and vomit all over the wall. I got to clean it all up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 735

You deserved it 5 397

By Anonymous - 07/10/2010 16:39 - United States

Today, my roommate and I invited a few girls over to our dorm for a small party. We started to play a drinking game, and I attempted to chug three beers in two minutes. My stomach wouldn't have that, and I spewed up bright red chunks everywhere and on everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 071

You deserved it 44 837

By theRoomie - 02/11/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, my loser roommate got wasted. He comes to me before going to bed, tells me he loves me, tries to hug me, then explosively vomits all over my face, my hair, my clothes. Then spends the rest of the night retching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 807

You deserved it 2 832

Great date

By okthen - 10/12/2019 20:00 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I finally made a move on the guy I've been crushing on for years… by getting so drunk that I puked in his lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 942

You deserved it 1 747

By Anonymous - 19/08/2009 22:31 - Canada

Today, a completely drunk girl walked across the bar and punched me in the face because I was wearing the same dress as her, and her boyfriend had said it looked better on me. While I was screaming at her for being a stupid bitch, she puked all over me, wiped her mouth, and laughed before she passed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 105

You deserved it 4 706

ballshhhhh 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 2:53

Are you ******* retarded?! Alcoholics can suck my vodka-soaked dick.

elephantom12 9

Friday 21 October 2011 17:19

I think you forgot to put your shirt on before you took that picture.

Comments

tbeaun 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 18:10

Was the cake chocolate?

ladycyn217 5

Saturday 17 December 2011 3:33

DUMB!! hahahaa

looloothing 9

Thursday 5 July 2012 6:36

******* lamest FML ever.

inlimbo11 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 5:39

or at least learn how to tell when you're about to puke up all your booze. deserved.

SomeRussianGirl 3

Saturday 28 July 2012 9:04

You deserve it for being a pussy and not holding you're liquor.

ZH13 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 23:42

#2, what does that have to do with anything?

SadinSherman 16

Saturday 20 August 2011 16:11

They just want to know

stiles_fml 0

Sunday 26 April 2009 2:53

how many people did u hit?

24788 6

Monday 27 April 2009 21:41

HAHA, know your limits

elephantom12 9

Friday 21 October 2011 17:19

I think you forgot to put your shirt on before you took that picture.

Applelover13 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 5:44

It was no one fault but yours so dont expect to get alot of FYL's

Applelover13 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 5:44

It was no one fault but yours so dont expect to get alot of FYL's

PokeyStix 3

Monday 1 June 2009 23:55

FML? There should be a more extreme YDI button. WHAT THE HELL DID YOU EXPECT? YOU THINK YOU WERE GONNA TURN INTO POPEYE OR SOMETHING?

awsumelefants 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 2:01

... oh. my. god.

ballshhhhh 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 2:53

Are you ******* retarded?! Alcoholics can suck my vodka-soaked dick.

Boomi 38

Tuesday 13 September 2016 5:26

Besides, who gets wasted at any sort of close friend's party?

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The Top

Today, I came home from college to find my favorite silk nightie that I'd left behind being modeled by Bernie, the family dog. Nobody will admit to who put it on him. I don't know what's worse, that my family is a bunch of assholes, or that my nightie is big enough to fit a Saint Bernard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 307

You deserved it 3 970

Today, I was riding on the back of my dad's motorcycle. After a few minutes, the vibrations from the engine became way too much for me and I couldn't control myself. I had such an intense orgasm, sitting right behind my father, with my arms around his waist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 792

You deserved it 16 308

The Top

Today, I got home from work early and discovered why my 17-year-old daughter's sprained elbow isn't getting any better after weeks of treatment. She can't stop giving handjobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 433

You deserved it 8 721

Today, my grandparents took me out for dinner for my birthday. After singing, "Happy birthday dear..." they froze. I had to say my own name because they'd forgotten it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 482

You deserved it 1 978

Today, I tried to get a job at Walmart. My mom was the hiring manager. She turned me down due to lack of work experience. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 073

You deserved it 447

Today, I picked up a rock outside and put it in my pocket because it looked cool. A teacher holding the door open stopped me and sent me to the principal. I was confused and asked the teacher why the strict action. She replied that someone has been putting rocks in the toilet. I got a detention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 915

You deserved it 3 010

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 816

You deserved it 7 800

Today, I was eating chips with my father. After I finished eating a chip I felt something between my teeth, It was pubic hair. I soon realized my dad was scratching his testicles while eating chips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97 951

You deserved it 6 538

Same thing different taste

Hangover

Chain reaction

Great date

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